Devildog Posted December 29, 2004 Share Posted December 29, 2004 Then by all means ask about more often sessions. I go once a week myself. I know how much it helps. I know the feeling of anticipation. It just seems like since my sessions are on Tuesdays, most things happen to me on Wednesday or Thursday and I have to wait all that time to talk about most of it. I am glad you are accepting of your faults for the affair and the problems in your marriage. Since you have checked out Marriage Builders I am sure you also realize it isn't all you. But you can only work on your issues. I think it helps to keep busy with trying to find answers and help during these hard times. It is also good to know that if things don't work out, you gave it everything you could. Link to post Share on other sites
Ladyjane14 Posted December 29, 2004 Share Posted December 29, 2004 I'm glad you're going to talk to your OB about depression, Grace. I'm not a doctor and I can't diagnose you. That's why I like to see people who are under the kind of stress that you dealing with go ahead and get checked out. I do know that when a person is experiencing prolonged feelings of sadness and the mental stress associated with loss, that the chemical balance of the brain can become effected. Physical stresses can cause it too, such as prolonged illness, or pregnancy related and post-partum changes. Not necessarily in all cases, but it's best to monitor a little more closely at these times, wouldn't you agree? I'm also glad you're checking out MB. But don't try to rush it. You can only control your own actions....no one else's. Just like you can only make your own decisions.....no one else's. Originally posted by Devildog... There is a lot of damage and hurt that only time will fix. It can't be a quick fix. You have to be patient and let things play out in their own time. You're doing everything that you can do, Sweetie. Just remember not to push. Be patient. Hope for the best, and prepare for the worst. This may not go your way, but it won't be because you didn't try. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Saving Grace Posted December 29, 2004 Author Share Posted December 29, 2004 Well I just signed my answer and counterclaim to the petition for divorce. I admitted to all the paragraphs that were stated except for the paragraph that states "marriage is irretrievably broken" . I believe that not to be true. I also didn't state that I request DIVORCE but rather legal separation and stated why. I do not want the judge to think I agree with this divorce or ending our marriage. This is what I wrote. Legal Separation because...although we have alot of issues, we never tried to work them out together, when he tried I didn't and now I'm trying and he isn't. I am now in individual therapy as well. we never tried or had marriage counseling either. I would rather see it end with both of us trying then to not have tried at all, at least marriage counseling. The self help center stated that because he requested it doesn't mean I have to and by writing the above statement does not necessarily mean that I would prolong the case. So we can have it both ways. What is the really weird is there are little things that are happening that I see as some type of sign. When I went to the bookstore to buy the Divorcebusters book and some other things the check total I wrote was exactly the same as our address. The very next day I wrote another check and the amount was exactly the same as the last four digits of my cell number which in reverse is the last four digits of our home number. And now writing this to you I am looking down at the answer and response form and it's dated yesterday December 28th, the day we found out my H and I were pregnant with our first child, December 28th, 2000. I see these as important signs that I am in a direction I am supposed to be in I guess. Like how I said before when I still think my dad is up there looking out for me. The more and more I think about the depression issue, I believe it's quite possible. And I'm sure will be more relevant after the baby is born. I din't really have any post par-tum issues with our first but with everything going on it's better to be prepared. Thanks for the advice. Busy Day~Gotta Run Grace Link to post Share on other sites
Ladyjane14 Posted December 30, 2004 Share Posted December 30, 2004 I wish I had some advice for you that would be handy concerning divorce agreements, but I don't know a whole lot about it. We'll have to yield to greater minds on that one! I'm glad you're finding resources though. You should think about a career in information research! Hang in there, hon. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Saving Grace Posted January 6, 2005 Author Share Posted January 6, 2005 Just wanted to let you all know that I went to the doctor today and the baby is breech but could still turn on his/her own. If not C section then, buts thats ok because I had regular birth 1st time around. OB also put me on Lexapro (depression meds). Gonna see how they work. I think I'll sleep well tonight......Thanks for the advice LJ Sorry I haven't posted much. Business is very busy and I think I was getting wrapped up in other people's problems a little bit. I need to step back and concentrate on mine. SG Link to post Share on other sites
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