Monodare1 Posted November 4, 2013 Share Posted November 4, 2013 Hi there Coming up to the 5 month point now,today I had an overwhelming feeling of worthlessness and loneliness. Feel stuck. Can only afford to live with my dad at the minute, only are my son once a week, feel lonely. Also feel like I need some female company but can't get out of this funk to make me seem more happy and attractive again. How do you shake this feeling? Link to post Share on other sites
Sheri Posted November 4, 2013 Share Posted November 4, 2013 I wish I knew the answer to that. I am coming up on 6 months tomorrow since my husband left me for someone else after 27 years of marriage. Everyone tells me to get over it but it is not that easy. I try and tell myself time will heal all wounds, it works about 10% of the time. I will tell you what I try and do, hang in there it will be ok. Link to post Share on other sites
RightThere Posted November 4, 2013 Share Posted November 4, 2013 Hi there Coming up to the 5 month point now,today I had an overwhelming feeling of worthlessness and loneliness. Feel stuck. Can only afford to live with my dad at the minute, only are my son once a week, feel lonely. Also feel like I need some female company but can't get out of this funk to make me seem more happy and attractive again. How do you shake this feeling? I'm getting pressure to move back home with my parents as well. I'd bet that has a lot to do with feeling low. Do you have a time frame as to when you're going to get your own place? Focus on that as a goal and it should help you to feel better as you know the current situation is only temporary. Also make sure you just get out on your own where people are. Hit they gym, even find a support group for divorce. I figure even grocery shopping I just try to smile at people. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Monodare1 Posted November 4, 2013 Author Share Posted November 4, 2013 I'm planning to save for a deposit for a flat, but I'm still not off the mortgage with my stbxw. So even if I get a deposit, I can't be on 2 mortgages. I'm also not looking to get into a serious relationship just now but I do feel that I need a confidence booster, maybe a date or two but with no heavy commitments. Just don't want to do online dating as that's how I met the stbxw in the first place. Link to post Share on other sites
Heartbroken Eagle Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Same boat as well. 8 months back at my Mother's. My main goal is to move to a flat in 2014. Also I'm missing the female companionship without wanting to be in a full blown relationship just yet. Would like to get the smile back on my face permanantly again... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Monodare1 Posted November 5, 2013 Author Share Posted November 5, 2013 I just miss the fun and flirting etc. also I miss the obvious as well, although that's not the be all and end all (although it would be nice lol) Just so much on my plate and it would be unfair to get involved in a long term relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Misadventure Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Hi there Coming up to the 5 month point now,today I had an overwhelming feeling of worthlessness and loneliness. Feel stuck. Can only afford to live with my dad at the minute, only are my son once a week, feel lonely. Also feel like I need some female company but can't get out of this funk to make me seem more happy and attractive again. How do you shake this feeling? You are not worthless...remember that. This is a transition period. It hurts, it sucks, and we have to go through it. When you feel like this, go to the gym, a bike ride, a walk, read a book, go make a friend, do something. Mono.. as far as the whole wanting to feel attractive thing, I totally get it. Just start going out either by yourself or with friends or even acquaintances, just get out. You don't have to "start" anything but it gets you moving again and talking to the opposite sex. It's weird at first but just talk, flirt, stretch yourself a little past your comfort zone. I have been talking alot to many when I am out but when they want my number or want to go on a date, I just can't do that yet. So I guess I am just boosting my own self esteem by soaking in attention...but at least I know why and I am aware lol. Would be nice to be able to get to that point where I am emotionally able to date. Heck even some ripping clothing throw-down would be nice but I have said no everytime... (SMH!). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dienstag Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Practical suggestion - friday night, some bar with music, a few drinks (not too many) and a bit of flirting with opposite sex, does not have to be a proper date where you have to talk and be "attractive" as you put it, the louder the music the less you have to talk. Being around people that are having fun can make you feel a bit better, flirting with opposite sex works wonders (pls note i am not suggesting dating ) and gives you hope that maybe one day ....you will be one of them again - careless, happy , looking for fun? Love? Life? Link to post Share on other sites
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