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Is my ex so sketchy because he has feelings?


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This guy and I dated a little over 4 years ago. It was very short lived, but he was my "first love," and I've always had a soft spot for him since.

About two years ago, my first year in college, things were going south with my mom's health and with my boyfriend. We were "on a break" (I should've broken up with him), and that Christmas, my ex and I reconciled. Where my boyfriend went days without talking to me, the ex would show me affection and invite me over every day to spend time with him. He told me that he'd still always loved me and knew he could treat me better than what I had. He even let "I love you" slip a few times. At the time, I was confused and decided it'd be best to stay with the boyfriend I'd known for 2 years rather than break away and get back with my ex that I'd only dated for a few months. So when my boyfriend decided he wanted to be with me, I dropped my ex like a hotcake. Pretty cruddy of me, right? The boyfriend and I ended up breaking up a few months after that anyways.

 

So present day, my ex will message me to see what's up every now and then, but after a few messages are exchanged, he disappears. This past weekend, we were messaging back and forth, joking about how young and immature we were when we dated (feels like we reminisce often), and I said, "I know you've always been a little distant with me ever since I led you on a while back, and I never got to apologize for that. I'm sorry, and if I could go back and do it again, I'd do it differently. I was immature." He responded with, "I was immature too. It's okay. Everything's good now." It was sort of a nostalgic conversation, like he opened up a little, but I fell asleep, and when I responded the next day, he went right back to no response again.

 

I joked to my best friend that "maybe he hates me," but she replied that if that were true, I wouldn't hear from him to start with. My only theory on that is that maybe he's scared if he forms a bond with me, I'll lead him on again like I did before, and he'll get hurt. I'm not trying to start a relationship with him, but his behavior just has me confused.

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