He cannot make it on my birthday

[HeavenOrHell]

Sorry to hear things didn't work out, LDR's can be one hell of a rollercoaster, most people wouldn't be able to cope with it, or enter an LDR in the first place.

Love isn't always enough unfortunately, in fact you can love someone so much that it hurts too much to stay in the LDR as you miss them too much, but if you can't bridge the distance, or it's too early in the r/ship to close the distance and break up over it it doesn't mean the love wasn't strong enough. People can be in love and still break up if it's too painful to stay in it.

 

My reply to your original post was going to be; I've missed most birthdays and xmas's and every new year with my partner for the past 3 1/2 years because of his work basically, I would have been upset if he didn't have a valid reason to not share birthdays etc together, but he doesn't get much choice in the matter because of work, so if he was choosing to not spend my birthday together when he could if he wanted then that would upset me and I think justifiably so, and I would have to tell him how I felt.

 

 

 

To everyone, we already broke up. And it hurts like hell. We really loved each other but I guess we cannot make it through the distance. We still love each other but we're tired of the emotional rollercoaster.

 

Thank you for each one of you who tried to help me out.

 

I just updated this maybe to have a clear end for myself.

 

It really hurts. It was true love. But maybe it's true that love is not enough. :'(

[old]

What does he plan to do after he finishes traveling? Does he have a job to go back to?

 

Missing your birthday should be no big deal. Birthdays are movable! Just celebrate it on a different date.

[Spectre]

To everyone, we already broke up. And it hurts like hell. We really loved each other but I guess we cannot make it through the distance. We still love each other but we're tired of the emotional rollercoaster.

 

Thank you for each one of you who tried to help me out.

 

I just updated this maybe to have a clear end for myself.

 

It really hurts. It was true love. But maybe it's true that love is not enough. :'(

 

Why did you break up specifically? Was the birthday thing a big part of it? Who initiated the breakup?

 

Look, I know you are hurting, but if it is truly "true love" for you,then I think you should fight for it. You're only really going to get one "true love" in life. You need to decide if this guy really is..and if he is you need to decide if you really want to not be with him.

 

How would guys you date in the future feel knowing some other man is your true love?

[justwhoiam]

Fact #1: I met this guy in my travels. We really had so much fun traveling hardcore together for 3 months. He visited me after 5 months of LDR and we spent 6 weeks together. He left by the start of October.

 

Fact #2: My boyfriend will be coming over again 3 to 4 weeks from now and will stay for a week or two.

 

Fact #3: My birthday will be in the last week of November so he already said he cannot make it for my birthday.

 

My Dilemma: I feel sad that he cannot make it on my birthday.

 

I questioned him about this decision and he told me he just cannot make it on time. He's just traveling in nearby countries right now and he has no other commitments whatsoever. I don't understand why he can't just make some efforts to make it on time. He told me he cannot just do everything as I wish while I'm waiting in the comforts of my home doing nothing.

...

I don't know the right question to ask you guys. Just tell me your opinion please.

My opinion: your demand was stupid, stupid, stupid. He had plans about his travel to other countries before thinking of visiting you. You made him feel as if you snap your fingers and he does whatever you want like a good puppy. Very wrong. He needs to be free to make decisions, and that is double rewarding, because anything comes from the heart and not because you asked. It was all about yourself and your birthday. I would have had my birthday celebrated on one of the days he had to be with me. So very simple! It was going to be a few days away from the real date anyway.

 

To everyone, we already broke up. And it hurts like hell. We really loved each other but I guess we cannot make it through the distance. We still love each other but we're tired of the emotional rollercoaster.

...

It really hurts. It was true love. But maybe it's true that love is not enough. :'(

You seemed to be unable to enjoy things, and blessings, like him visiting you... also, you were in the early stages of falling in love, and need to let the other person free to feel the way they feel and learn from that. I don't buy the "it was true love but we were tired". When it's true love, you can't live without the one you love, out of their life (unless death took them away).

 

How come no one to ask you about your boyfriend didn't you say in your original post that you have a boyfriend and he'll be coming staying for a 1 to 2 weeks. You women are something else..?

Isn't he the same person??