Has anyone overcome jealousy in a relationship?

[JBlackstone]

I'm just curious if anyone out there struggling with jealousy and insecurities has actually overcome it. This is something I have dealt with in all my relationships, especially my current one since it is my longest and most important. I am in therapy and while I have moments of freedom from these emotions, the road ahead seems really long. I'm hoping someone out there can offer some positive inspiration!!

[liloldlady]

I bear in mind: it is not attractive to my lover...

[jphcbpa]

Yes...a work in progress. I too was in therapy from time to time for this issue....it comes and goes.

 

Here is what I did/do beyond therapy:

 

1) SLAA...several meetings per week if possible

 

2) Men's Fellowship dinner every week.

 

3) A handful of men that I trust explicitly. I call them and tell them the crazy thoughts in my head. I put it out there to them only. NEVER to her.

 

4) I have a crazy thought journal. At the top, I write out the crazy thought(s). At the bottom I write out reality and what is really going on. It might take a few days to fill in those reality blanks once the full story has been understood and your thoughts become clear.

 

5) Sometimes(very rarely) I will tell my g/f that I am feeling a little insecure in order to take her off the hook. She always will ask "is there something I can do". Her saying that is all she needs to do since it has nothing to do with her. I comment.."no baby, thank you".

 

6) Keep a gratitude journal/prayer journal.

 

7) Read books and meditation books ect.

 

8) pray/meditate/breath/work out/run

 

9) remember the good things about your partner, focus on that, channel your energy

 

10) remind yourself that no matter what you are loved and lovable and that person can come or go..you will be just fine.

 

11) keep your hear full of love

 

12) make your relationship a "partial overlap" and get loved interdependently.