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in the new dream


chickenlegs

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In the new dream she does not want to come back to me. She came back to me in the dreams I had of her after the break up, back in May. In these new dreams, I either get a letter or she calls or she shows up and my door and apologizes. She says she is sorry that things didn't work out, and that she never meant to say the things she did, and she is ashamed because she never thought she would be able to treat someone who meant something to her with such venom.

 

I don't know where I am going with this. I don't think I am asking for advice. She's just been in my head for 7 months. There is never an absolution.

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I had a dream that my ex called me up and told me to meet him in a hotel in New York. I was in another country. I traveled by ship, plane and train and finally ended up in New York City. I went to the pay phone in the lobby of the hotel to call him and he was nowhere to be found. Nobody picked up the phone in his room. I put the received down and walked away. I don't even remember being mad. I just thought........hmm, that was an interesting journey. The end.

 

Dreams are strange. That was the first dream I have had about my ex that I remember in a long time. Oh except for two nights before we moved in together. I had a dream that he walked away from me with another girl who looked like me. A week later my ex and I were broken up and he started dating another girl (who resembled me). That was a very vivid dream, though. True to life.

 

I wonder how often dreams are true?

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this summer I kept having recurring dreams of my ex cheating on me and laughing when I found out. laughing so hard tears were streaming down his face. I could hear his voice, and it sounded so real in my dream, saying "you actually believed I loved you?!" I would see him walking down a sunny alleyway holding hands with a girl, looking back at me with a grin on his face. this was all occurring when we were still together. I often woke up with tears streaming down my face.

 

since breaking up I have dreamed of me preparing frantically in the last hour before our wedding, rushing to get into my dress and makeup. I have had several other wedding-themed dreams involving him but few others that I have remembered upon waking up.

 

I often dream of seeing someone I haven't seen in a long time and then run into them or see their name somewhere a few days later.

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Night before last, I had a dream that my best friend was maliciously telling me that she was in love with my ex boyfriend and that he felt the same toward her, and that I deserved it (which, I think I do). I woke up in a cold sweat at 4am and laid there awake until the sun rose, at which point I had to get up because I knew I'd never be able to fall asleep. One of the worst nightmares I've had in a while.

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