VirginiaBob Posted December 21, 2004 Share Posted December 21, 2004 Is it just me or do any of you also have a history of getting dumped at a time where you need your mind to be extra sharp? My last 3 major relationships, I was dumped the week before finals in undergrad college, dumped the day before the GRE (admission test for grad school) and dumped the day before finals in graduate school. I'm starting to think it is on purpose and it happened in the last 2 cases because I told them about the previous times. Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 YES!!!!!!! Both times I have been broken up with (by the same person) has been right before finals. Last semester he dumped me right before finals and this semester...YEP once again right before finals. Really does make ya wonder..... Well....if it is that's a pretty sh*tty thing for them to do. Kinda vindictive, isn't it? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony Posted December 22, 2004 Senior Moderators Share Posted December 22, 2004 Most people who get dumped just before finals have it happen because their reaction to the stress of impending exams, final papers due, etc. is so overwhelming their behavior becomes inappropriate and alienates others around them. Most people don't realize just how they are. People are in relationships to feel good, not to be treated harshly. Whether somebody is going through final exam stress or not, if they're treating their SO with lack of consideration, respect, harshness, etc., they can expect to get booted. A person's reaction to exams is akin to their reaction to many other stressful life situations, such as pregnancy, financial problems, moving, unemployment, etc. People don't want life partners who handle that stress by exhibiting caustic behavior or taking it out on them. And people don't just get dumped before finals. They get dumped every hour of every day for all kinds of reasons. Their are cheapskapes who dump their SO before Christmas to keep from having to buy them a present. Go figure..... Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 I never sweated during finals. Never got anxious or angry or wanting out of a relationship. Then again I was a drunk. Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Tony...YES I thought of that...(the cheapskates) Funny how my ex dumped me before Christmas last year, this year, and has always dumped me before my birthday... wow... what a cheap-o. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 I was dumped just before a thesis defense. I wasn't wretched to him at all - but I couldn't spend time with him because I was so busy working so, rather than wait for me, he found entertainment elsewhere. Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 moimeme, That is just AWFUL. What an a**!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
MissingHerBad Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 I feel that...I threw away the whole semester this year Weak..... I cant beleive I let someone do tht to me... Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Glad I am not the only one.... Its near impossible to really focus on school work when you are going through crap like this. I barely passed my most important class this semester because of all this turmoil. It makes me mad too that I woudl let someone get to me like that but I would bet its hard to find someone who could do their studies really well after having a brutal breakup. Even one of my professors said that when he was in grad school, he couldn't do ANYTHING for a whole week and just layed in bed when he had important things to do....and then his ceiling caved in on him... ahh..when it rains it pours... At least the professor was able to laugh and joke about it..that makes me feel better. Link to post Share on other sites
an'ka Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 YES!!! I'm not alone!!! Last year's Fall semester-break up 4 days before the final week Spring semester-break up 6 days before the final week all by the same person This year I'm not in relationship with this person anymore, but guess what? 2 weeks before finals he decides that he wants to get back with me and gives a Loooooooooot of things to think about!!! Gives me a looooooooooot of headache! And guess what? I fail my final!!!! I'm so pissed!!! How selfish! How inconsiderate!!! Wow!!! I'm premed and I really need to keep my grades as perfect as possible! For the past 3 semesters I've been crawling out of my skin not to f*** my grades up. It's so stressful! Wow. Should we start a compaign and lobby the congress in order for them to pass a law that "BREAKING UP BEFORE FINALS OR ANY KIND OF TEST IS ILLEGAL!!!"? You work so hard to get the grades in order to make your future better, and one thing just ruins everything! ok, I'll stop this now thanks for reading Link to post Share on other sites
munkeygirl Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 But I agree with Tony. People going through finals thake out their crap on their partners... I know I did, even after he helped me with flashcards and putting together final projects. It was so hard to concentrate, but you have to put yourself first and use your anger to make yourself study harder and succeed, which is as we all the THE BEST REVENGE EVER. =) Link to post Share on other sites
Author VirginiaBob Posted December 22, 2004 Author Share Posted December 22, 2004 I would disagree with Tony in my case, due to the women I was involved with. I didn't backlash at any of them due to stress - if anything, I stayed away from them too much during that time so that I could study more, but you think they would be understanding of that. I do think it has been malicious though because I specifically told each of them during the relationship that if we ever do break up, let's make a point of waiting the extra couple of weeks until finals/or other life changing exam before we end it. But the opposite happened, they wait until right before finals. Luckily, I still ended up doing well on my finals this time anyways - all A's. Another thing is that I made a loud and specific point with my most recent ex-fiance, that she should not say yes to the proposal and we should not start making weddiing plans until she is sure. But, of course, she left me with $12,000 in wedding expenses and a broken heart, on Dec 3 (right before finals, which my last one was due on Dec. 9), and told me specifically that the reason she left me was because she never really loved me. The wedding was to take place on Jan. 1st. Link to post Share on other sites
Gottabestrong Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 I got dumped twice on the eve before my studies started. The fist time the day before I started studying for my B.A. And now 3 months ago the day before I started studying for my MA. What's up with that? Those were two different guys and I dont think I told the second about the timing of the previous breakup. And just as a side remark, I was never stressed or unattentive before I started my studies. I was looking forward to them and felt happy and excited about it. Somehow I think they chose that time so I had something else to focus on and would be distracted. Not that it was true. If I ever go for my Ph.D. I better be single first, or I wont dare. I hate this getting dumped at the beginning of my studies. Really ruins all the semester start fun for me. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 I've seen it often here that some people need a lot of attention so if for some reason you can't lavish attention on them (like you're supposed to be working), they go look for someone else who will. Link to post Share on other sites
MissingHerBad Posted December 22, 2004 Share Posted December 22, 2004 Originally posted by YX32Nemesis Glad I am not the only one.... Its near impossible to really focus on school work when you are going through crap like this. I barely passed my most important class this semester because of all this turmoil. It makes me mad too that I woudl let someone get to me like that but I would bet its hard to find someone who could do their studies really well after having a brutal breakup. Even one of my professors said that when he was in grad school, he couldn't do ANYTHING for a whole week and just layed in bed when he had important things to do....and then his ceiling caved in on him... ahh..when it rains it pours... At least the professor was able to laugh and joke about it..that makes me feel better. When it rains it pours...So true....Not only did I lose my girlfriend, but my job, my friends and just yesterday my truck got stolen and I found out my cousin has cancer....Holy **** when it rains it pours especially in Vancouver Link to post Share on other sites
Puma Posted December 23, 2004 Share Posted December 23, 2004 wow!! i didnt think about it until readin this thread but yeah i did too...ithink the stress that gets to someone durin such events as finals plays a big part on a decision as lettin one go..for both the dumper and the dumpee. dumper feels less stress asthe relationship is not there anymore...and the dumpee feels like crap andhas to balance so many thing now..its hard. and i admit also that it has affected me and this semester just went down the drain because of all the drama that went down not only with my ending of the relationship...i think it is true that wehn it rains it pours, lets put out our umbrellas now people!! stop it from hittin us Link to post Share on other sites
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