My mother is too controlling and it's making me depressed

[Ethereal]

I'm 24 years old and still living with my parents. My mother has always been controlling and over protective since I was a teenager but I thought this would stop as I grew older. It hasn't.

 

I told her I wanted my hair cut into a long bob. I used to have lovely thick long hair when I was younger but over the years after using heating products on it, it has become thin and frazzled. I think a good cut would do it good, and bobs can still look just as feminine as long hair. Also I've just gone through a break up and they always say a girl needs to cut her hair after a break up.

 

When I told her this she went mad. She said a bob wouldn't suit me, and that I'd regret it. She was saying I need to use hair repair products instead. At the end of the day I don't want to spend my money on expensive products and be fussing over my hair in the mirror for ages. I just want healthy low-maintenance hair. I've told her all this but she won't listen. My dad won't help either as he's scared of her and always stays on her side.

 

How do I handle this? I feel it's not normal to be controlled at the age of 24. Maybe when I was 16, yeah. But not now!

[Arabella]

Hair repair products don't really do anything long-term, especially for heat-damaged hair. At best, they 'fix' it temporarily so it appears healthier, but it never recovers completely.

 

How do you handle this? You go and get your haircut and if she says something, just respond with "It's my hair, and I like it this way." End of story.

 

The only way she's going to stop controlling you is if you show her that you can and will stand up for yourself. This is a perfect opportunity to begin doing so.

 

-A

[pteromom]

Stop telling her what you want to do, and instead just go out and DO what you want to do.

 

Don't give her any control over your life.

 

Don't make her issues your issues.

 

Don't engage in arguments with her.

[starzarebrite37]

You are no longer a child. You my dear, are a woman. Go get the hair you want. In order for her to stop being controlling, you must stop seeking her approval. Do what you want.

[d0nnivain]

You're 24 . . . move out. If you don't live with your mother, she can't control you.