What the hell?

[Lou]

I have been in a relationship with a girl for 2 months, and yesterday we were chatting on AOL instant messenger, and we got into the topic of sex and previous partners. So she tells me that she had a boyfriend, and then she tells me all the places they had sex in : including public bathroom, public parking, forest, roof, staircase....I could not believe my eyes. Either she has no brains that she tells me that or I am crazy that I am blowing this out of proportion....She was only 16 for God's sake. Now I don't know what to do, I wish she never told me that...

 

ANyone has any opinion about it?

 

Thanks

[Tony T]

You didn't say how old she was now...but she still has the mentality of a 16-year-old. Sex should be a pretty private thing. Further, I think it's highly inappropriate to tell a boyfriend the kinds of things she disclosed on AOL.

 

Now, in a court of law she would be found completely acquitted of any wrongdoing because it could not be proven that she was actually the one typing the Instant Messages. So, on that basis you have to consider her technically not guilty.

 

If it was her, she is very immature and some of the things she said may have had the effect of turning you off to her for a long time to come.

 

Further, I would have a difficult time believing she had sex in some of these locations. Maybe she's crazy. Normal people who have been raised properly don't break the law like this (having sex in public settings is against the law in every municipality in the country). People with common sense and decency don't have sex all over the place like an animal.

 

We all have to learn that actions have consequences...and it looks like she'll be learning that sooner than later.

 

Maybe you just ought to tell her how inappropriate she was and how this has affected you so she won't make the same mistake again. Perhaps you can give her another chance. That's entirely up to you. She really sounds like a baby.

[WGirl]

Well, I don't see why she told you all of those things.

 

I don't like to discuss my past sexual encounters with current boyfriends. Considering my age and everything, I think I'm grossly inexperienced in comparison with others in my age group. I believe that type of information should be kept private also. I don't even tell my girlfriends everything.

 

I feel very uncomfortable discussing it. Maybe they were testing me to see what type of girl was. A couple seemed pretty interested in my previous sexual encounters. I think you need to ask as far as stds go but as far as revealing some of the details she disclosed, that is a little too much information. Maybe she thought you would somehow be impressed.

 

I have had the same the experiences with men telling me too much about their past sex lives. It is a major turn-off. I don't really know why they told me the things that they did. Maybe they thought I would think they were studs or something. I couldn't look at some of them the same way again after some of the things I had heard.

You didn't say how old she was now...but she still has the mentality of a 16-year-old. Sex should be a pretty private thing. Further, I think it's highly inappropriate to tell a boyfriend the kinds of things she disclosed on AOL. Now, in a court of law she would be found completely acquitted of any wrongdoing because it could not be proven that she was actually the one typing the Instant Messages. So, on that basis you have to consider her technically not guilty.

 

If it was her, she is very immature and some of the things she said may have had the effect of turning you off to her for a long time to come.

 

Further, I would have a difficult time believing she had sex in some of these locations. Maybe she's crazy. Normal people who have been raised properly don't break the law like this (having sex in public settings is against the law in every municipality in the country). People with common sense and decency don't have sex all over the place like an animal. We all have to learn that actions have consequences...and it looks like she'll be learning that sooner than later. Maybe you just ought to tell her how inappropriate she was and how this has affected you so she won't make the same mistake again. Perhaps you can give her another chance. That's entirely up to you. She really sounds like a baby.