I need Help!

[Ryan43]

I have fallen in love with a woman I work with. I think about her all the time. She is an absolutely wonderful person, who I love spending time with, and talking to. I want to persue a deeper relationship with her, something beyond work. However, I don't know how to. I would love to just ask her out, but I can't. If for some reason she does not feel the same way I do, or is not interested in me, I'm afraid it would make our working situation awkward. I don't want her to be uncomfortable around me, but I can't stand not being around her. I think about her all the time, and would give anything to have a relationship with her. Please help me. What should I do.

[Rachel]

In life, you only get what you ask for.

 

Ask, and you will receive.

 

What do you have to lose, a bit of embarassment?

 

Embarassment or a lifetime of happiness, hmmmmmmmm.........

[Tony T]

Getting involved with people at work is a very difficult proposition. Two very mature people can pull it off OK but that's a rarity. It does get awkward if there's a break up...and also when people at work start to find out two people from their work are dating...and they always find out and start spreading gossip and making fun.

 

Just like anywhere else, you're going to have to risk rejection. There's just no way around it. You might ask somebody who knows her if she's seeing someone right now. If she's not, you must have an idea from your contact with her if she's sort of iterested in you or not.

 

If you have absolutely no facts or feelings about her whatsoever, just take some time during a break, lunch or in the parking lot after work to approach her. Start some small talk. Use your good judgement from there. If you have a good feeling about the intial part of the encounter, just ask her out. If she says NO, you won't have to worry about this ever again.

 

If she's interested, she'll go out of her way to make some time available to see you.

 

Hey, this love stuff isn't easy. You gotta do what you gotta do. My best feeling is this lady has been waiting for you to approach her and ask her out. Don't waste anymore time.

 

If for some reason she says no, you may be disappointed but you will feel a new freedom that you can move on and concentrate on someone who will be interested in you. You win either way!!!

[Ryan43]

You're right. I know I should just ask her, but it's not the rejection that worries me so much, its the idea that she would feel uncomfortable around me. I guess I'm just over analyzing the situation. I appreciate your advice.

Getting involved with people at work is a very difficult proposition. Two very mature people can pull it off OK but that's a rarity. It does get awkward if there's a break up...and also when people at work start to find out two people from their work are dating...and they always find out and start spreading gossip and making fun. Just like anywhere else, you're going to have to risk rejection. There's just no way around it. You might ask somebody who knows her if she's seeing someone right now. If she's not, you must have an idea from your contact with her if she's sort of iterested in you or not. If you have absolutely no facts or feelings about her whatsoever, just take some time during a break, lunch or in the parking lot after work to approach her. Start some small talk. Use your good judgement from there. If you have a good feeling about the intial part of the encounter, just ask her out. If she says NO, you won't have to worry about this ever again. If she's interested, she'll go out of her way to make some time available to see you. Hey, this love stuff isn't easy. You gotta do what you gotta do. My best feeling is this lady has been waiting for you to approach her and ask her out. Don't waste anymore time. If for some reason she says no, you may be disappointed but you will feel a new freedom that you can move on and concentrate on someone who will be interested in you. You win either way!!!