catalina287 Posted November 24, 2013 Share Posted November 24, 2013 I've been in a wonderful relationship for about 7 years. We had our few conflicts like any regular couple and worked them out using them to strengthen our relationship. Since September, I've had this weird feeling…either my boyfriend has a crush on my cousin or they both got involved and are too obvious. My cousin was in a relationship with my boyfriend's best friend…they got married and were together for 8-9 years ….they recently got separated and moved out. It was around their separation…I noticed my boyfriend began seeking contact with my cousin. He kept saying I want to give her advice and let her know that "not all guys are bad." " I just want her to be happy." He would always let me know when they would talk or if she needed help he would offer and let me know if i wanted to join. I never had a problem because I knew my cousin would never do anything to betray me. Recently at a halloween event, my cousin came drunk and althrough out the whole night, i noticed her flirtatious glances at my BF..she even kissed him on the cheek which she never did in all these years. At the bathroom, she cried and confessed how much my bf reminded her of her ex. I told this information to my bf to ask him to keep his distance from her so she could heal and because I was worried maybe through her drunkness …something would happen between my bf and her. After this conversion, I kept finding out that my bf still keep in contact with her…always asking her… who she was with?…why she had moved on so fast after her breakup…. it would be long paragraphs. Just last night, my sister informed me that my bf followed my cousin and the man she is seeing ! he texted her long paragraphs about how disappointed he was in her so getting over her ex so fast. I am now angry and hurt and confused because: does my bf have a crush on my cousin? could something have happened between them? My bf and his reactions and all his attention to my cousin is worrying me and I don't know what to do. I have already spoken to him twice asking him to keep his distance from her and he didn't listen… I will be speaking to him tonight about last night's conflict because he does not even know that my sister told me. …. what should I do? Am I right in being worried about my bf 's crazy obsession and all his attention on my cousin? why is he doing it … if in all these years being together he never paid attention to her ….it was only after my cousin and his bf split up that he began seeking my cousin" to see if she was alright" Link to post Share on other sites
Toddbt12y1 Posted November 24, 2013 Share Posted November 24, 2013 He needs to be dumped. Probably not what you want to hear, but hear me out. Your b/f is stalking your cousin, and that is just way over-the-top. Whether they did something together or not, is awfully hard to tell. It could have happened, and not happened. She was drunk, gave him a kiss on the cheek, but, we have nothing else to show she did anything. Seems like he is trying hard to get her attention; maybe to get her to do something with him. She must be being resistant to such bizarre advances. She has a b/f now, and this creep of a boyfriend of yours, is following her/them around, constantly texting long paragraphs to her. Even though you plainly told him to stop, and keep his distance. This guy is nuts. Perhaps he has an obsession, but it is insane. He is in every way disrespecting her and YOU. Instead of telling him a hundred times over, and getting the same results, end it. Be cautious. ...If he would stalk her, he will you. No telling what he might do. But this is not right. ..for either of you. Link to post Share on other sites
Oldspiceywolf Posted November 24, 2013 Share Posted November 24, 2013 Dude is shady no doubt! This sounds ridiculous but if you can't break up with him right now and just want to get his attention try telling him everything and if he gets either defensive or aggressive take the same stance: "your action disgust me, I know what I noticed and I'm not paranoid, in fact I had a lot of trust in you, gave you plenty of space to do what you thought was right and you repaid me like this... I need some time to see if I can even do this anymore!" If he cares he'll get his act together if he doesn't car the. You know what you need to do. Just be honest about how you feel and only accept what you want. It's your life don't waste it not getting back what you put in. Link to post Share on other sites
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