Gemini47 Posted November 25, 2013 Share Posted November 25, 2013 Hello all (first time poster), Let me say that I'm not trying to unfairly group or type cast any number of people. I'm only saying 'hipster' so I can get as specific as possible for the sake of this post. Let me start off by giving a bit of a background on myself... When I do go on dates I typically do well (disclaimer:this sounds lame and is probably turning people against me as they read this.. However, I only say this to provide some perspective) I'm in sales as a profession so talking to people, and making them feel comfortable, is generally something I'm good at. I'm polite, funny, and good at getting to know someone. Typically, subsequent dates will happen from the majority of first dates that I go on. However, this amount of luck (if you will) doesn't happen with hipster girls. The first date with a hipster girl that didn't go well was after I met her at a large music fest. We jammed out, talked a bit, ran around the place, danced, and even went back to my buddys place and hung out. We then went on a date a few nights later and I never heard from her again. I attributed this to dressing a bit too nice or like a frat douche (I had nice jeans, and a black button down shirt). I figured my image had to be what was repelling her... During the date we talked about many topics, and I think we got to know eachother well- there was never a dull moment in the conversation. We even went to a cool lounge/bar afterwards that played awesome chilled out music that I'm now obsessed with. There was no reason to believe that I wouldn't hear from her again. I chalked this up to most likely being very different than the typical crowd she normally hangs with... My most recent hipster date was a few weeks ago (as you might expect from the pervious paragraph, I'm prepared to go into detail).... We met up for beers and I could tell when she arrived that she was a little shy and probably wondering what she had gotten herself into. We got into a conversation regarding her trip to europe and I shared my travel experiences as well. We shared common ground on many areas including a love for old horror flicks. We ended up sharing a good 4 hours at this place and we spoke on many topics and many laughs were had. She ended up coming back to my place (I figured things were going well), and we watched a movie and even got food afterwards and we still came back to my place. The night finished with us making out (nothing more ) and it was a very good make out too Ever since that date she's been aloof. She's very brief doesn't do anything to continue the conversation and she hasn't returned my last text inviting her over to watch this cool documentary we spoke about on our first date. I can't tell if I'm being judged by my looks or the way I dress. I actually tried to dress down for the date so i didn't seem like a pretentious d-bag. I figured good laughs and conversations built on common ground were supposed to ensure, if anything, that another date would occur. PS. In both scenarios I didn't do any 'creepy' stuff to warrant no future communucation i.e. too much texting, calling, etc. Feel free to shoot me any questions. You can add your 2 cents or provide your own stories. Or you can respond and say whatever the heck you want. I guess I'm just destined to not be with hipster girls Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted November 25, 2013 Share Posted November 25, 2013 have not a clue.......i woudl like you to define hipster and what that is.....do they wear those jeans slung low with apple bottom jeans boots with the fur.....crap have to listen to the song now... or sunglasses at night woot woot dance it....... I Wear My Sunglasses at Night with Lyrics - YouTube ...........deb 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gemini47 Posted November 25, 2013 Author Share Posted November 25, 2013 Here's a definition I pulled that actually seems pretty spot on: Hipsters are a subculture of men and women typically in their 20's and 30's that value independent thinking, counter-culture, progressive politics, an appreciation of art and indie-rock, creativity, intelligence, and witty banter. The greatest concentrations of hipsters can be found living in the Williamsburg, Wicker Park, and Mission District neighborhoods of major cosmopolitan centers such as New York, Chicago, and San Francisco respectively. Although "hipsterism" is really a state of mind,it is also often intertwined with distinct fashion sensibilities. Hipsters reject the culturally-ignorant attitudes of mainstream consumers, and are often be seen wearing vintage and thrift store inspired fashions, tight-fitting jeans, old-school sneakers, and sometimes thick rimmed glasses. Both hipster men and women sport similar androgynous hair styles that include combinations of messy shag cuts and asymmetric side-swept bangs. Such styles are often associated with the work of creative stylists at urban salons, and are usually too "edgy" for the culturally-sheltered mainstream consumer. The "effortless cool" urban bohemian look of a hipster is exemplified in Urban Outfitters and American Apparel ads which cater towards the hipster demographic. Despite misconceptions based on their aesthetic tastes, hipsters tend to be well educated and often have liberal arts degrees, or degrees in maths and sciences, which also require certain creative analytical thinking abilities. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted November 25, 2013 Share Posted November 25, 2013 (edited) heres what i think as a free thinking spirit....you are too into the def of what hipster is.......you find it cool ....hipsters dont find themselves cool they just are......they are not doing it to rebel against consumerism they do it because they like the fashion they like the hairstyles the music the bohemian life.........its just them......they have money but they prefer to go to an op shop and pick up a bargain.....they dont have a particular style or fit any mold....thats my def of hipster...went to a commune on the equinoxe they were all hipsters with uni degrees.......i didnt even know that was what hipster was......honestly i didnt care what they wore i preferred when they didnt strip off and jump around naked though......felt a little uncomfortable then.....i fit in to any group because i dont judge people on where they shop or how their hair sits.....or what type they are or box they fit......i dont have boxes..... do you have distinct rigidity honestly do you feel you have distinct style.....deb Edited November 25, 2013 by todreaminblue 3 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted November 25, 2013 Share Posted November 25, 2013 I can't tell if I'm being judged by my looks or the way I dress. I actually tried to dress down for the date so i didn't seem like a pretentious d-bag. I figured good laughs and conversations built on common ground were supposed to ensure, if anything, that another date would occur. Good laughs and conversation usually IS enough to ensure that another date will occur. Well, that + attraction. If she was making out with you, she was attracted to you. So it has to be something you DID. I don't believe a black shirt would scare someone off. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
melell Posted November 25, 2013 Share Posted November 25, 2013 I would think that being counter-culture would mean rejecting ideals about dress. Ie- not judging someone by how they dress at all. Bring back punks, these alternatives today never go the full mile. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gemini47 Posted November 25, 2013 Author Share Posted November 25, 2013 i apologize if i am wrong, but i'm getting the sense that you are older than these 'hipsters' & somewhat square in your fashion by comparison. I'm 27 so I don't think age had anything to do with it. I'm not completely devoid of fashion I just never shop (hate it!). I think I just don't dress similar to the people they hang around with- so perhaps its perceived that I'm not one of 'them'?. Although, in full disclosure I did dress kind of hipster on this most recent date (thinking I would not make the same mistake twice). Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted November 25, 2013 Share Posted November 25, 2013 I'm 27 so I don't think age had anything to do with it. I'm not completely devoid of fashion I just never shop (hate it!). I think I just don't dress similar to the people they hang around with- so perhaps its perceived that I'm not one of 'them'?. Although, in full disclosure I did dress kind of hipster on this most recent date (thinking I would not make the same mistake twice). you have to be comfortable in the skin you are in so maybe you dressing the part put you off be yourself....you actually probably rock more that way.....i would sense a guy was uncomfortable.......it would make me a bit skittish......deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gemini47 Posted November 25, 2013 Author Share Posted November 25, 2013 you have to be comfortable in the skin you are in so maybe you dressing the part put you off be yourself....you actually probably rock more that way.....i would sense a guy was uncomfortable.......it would make me a bit skittish......deb ok, well that's certainly a fair assumption based on what I said, although I don't believe that was the case. I didn't walk into urban outfitters and have them pick out an outfit or anything... I just dressed purposefully more casual than I would on a first date- if anything I felt more comfortable. I wore a grey shirt with zip up knitted hoodie which i wore under a pea coat (my usual coat during winter). Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted November 26, 2013 Share Posted November 26, 2013 the only class we are in are - the human class. Never can grasp the mindset of casting ones' self into a particular classification such as "yuppie", "geek","dork" "player" etc. It does no good. At the end of the day, your blood flows and your breathing softens...beyond that you are no different. Why box yourself in with a label of a culture? When you are older you'll get that these "type" castings are mirages, and the thing that matters is you made it this far. Personally the characteristics of a hipster sounds amazingly intriguing. Someone who goes to the beat of their own drum....Sounds independent SOme folks just enjoy the present moment and pay no mind to future goals...maybe this person simply enjoyed you for the moment....and that is a compliment if you think about it 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gemini47 Posted November 26, 2013 Author Share Posted November 26, 2013 SOme folks just enjoy the present moment and pay no mind to future goals...maybe this person simply enjoyed you for the moment....and that is a compliment if you think about it I'm completely blown away by your post. I honestly read it probably 20 times- especially the part above. For some reason i had an eerie feeling as i was reading it like you know more than you're letting on. I think you're spot on accurate with your prognosis, in fact reading it gave me chills- and not bc its like 20 degrees out! I do want to say that i don't look and label people. I also give everyone a fair chance as i would expect the favor to be returned. I've kind of gotten sick of most people that i know bc i feel everyone in this society is trying to be something that they're not and individuality seems sadly lost. I guess for this reason ive been more attracted to women that lead alternative lifestyles (dare i say hipster?) so to speak. I also feel that I'm a very unique person as well that holds much more than meets the eye. Hmmmm it looks like im gonna have a lot to think about as i lay in bed tonight... Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted November 26, 2013 Share Posted November 26, 2013 Why would anybody actually want to date a hipster besides a hipster themself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 Why would anybody actually want to date a hipster besides a hipster themself. Woggle- you come from the theory that like attracts like? OR should only date in their own "social cast?" Thank goodness most healthy relations are built on the ability to be different in character, it balances... Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 I'm completely blown away by your post. I honestly read it probably 20 times- especially the part above. For some reason i had an eerie feeling as i was reading it like you know more than you're letting on. I think you're spot on accurate with your prognosis, in fact reading it gave me chills- and not bc its like 20 degrees out! I do want to say that i don't look and label people. I also give everyone a fair chance as i would expect the favor to be returned. I've kind of gotten sick of most people that i know bc i feel everyone in this society is trying to be something that they're not and individuality seems sadly lost. I guess for this reason ive been more attracted to women that lead alternative lifestyles (dare i say hipster?) so to speak. I also feel that I'm a very unique person as well that holds much more than meets the eye. Hmmmm it looks like im gonna have a lot to think about as i lay in bed tonight... It sounds like you are level headed. You will find your taste (attractions) may change in time...yet its the rite of passage to find such that meets your lifestyle choice. Best to you ! Link to post Share on other sites
KatZee Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 (edited) Woggle- you come from the theory that like attracts like? OR should only date in their own "social cast?" Thank goodness most healthy relations are built on the ability to be different in character, it balances... See the thing about hipsters though, at least from the one's I've experienced in Brooklyn, NYC... they are VERY pretentious. Most aren't even true hipsters, they're posers. They thing being "indie" is the cool thing to do, so they all follow around on this bandwagon trend and a lot of them are super obnoxious. They look down on you or talk down to you if you listen to Top 40 on the radio or look and appear "mainstream." Being around them, I felt like they were sucking my soul out. They have this way of making you feel really inadequate and lame. That's what I think Woggle is getting at when he says, "why would you want to date one unless you are one." Edited November 27, 2013 by KatZee 1 Link to post Share on other sites
theothersully Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 Seriously, these hipsters (if in Brooklyn or something) are not as open minded and free as their image leads you to believe. They closely follow a recipe for being "cool" which means they are not free thinkers. They are conformists trying to fit in to a sub culture. Girls typically join these types of sun cultures, at least initially, because they find hipster guys cute. So, it is quite possible that your career and nice clothes are indeed turning off these closed minded conformists. I guarantee if you show up in Williamsburg with a nice wall street suit on, you get no play from the ladies there. So... either confirm to the sub culture yourself, or forget the hipsters and go with girls who like sales guys. If sticking with hipsters, grow an ironic beard, get dirty and wear some rags. And next time bring a case of PBR 1 Link to post Share on other sites
theothersully Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 See the thing about hipsters though, at least from the one's I've experienced in Brooklyn, NYC... they are VERY pretentious. Most aren't even true hipsters, they're posers. They thing being "indie" is the cool thing to do, so they all follow around on this bandwagon trend and a lot of them are super obnoxious. They look down on you or talk down to you if you listen to Top 40 on the radio or look and appear "mainstream." Being around them, I felt like they were sucking my soul out. They have this way of making you feel really inadequate and lame. That's what I think Woggle is getting at when he says, "why would you want to date one unless you are one." jinx! lol Link to post Share on other sites
KatZee Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 jinx! lol Lmao! My post went through first!!! Seriously though, with how "indie" they all claim their lives are, they would never be caught dead with anyone who was "mainstream." 1 Link to post Share on other sites
theothersully Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 A funny book I had about 10 years ago.... the hipster handbook on Tumblr The Hipster Handbook Link to post Share on other sites
KatZee Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 A funny book I had about 10 years ago.... the hipster handbook on Tumblr The Hipster Handbook Ugh, I just rolled my eyes about 35 times since opening that link. I seriously cannot handle those people. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 Woggle- you come from the theory that like attracts like? OR should only date in their own "social cast?" Thank goodness most healthy relations are built on the ability to be different in character, it balances... I just find them annoying. I wouldn't want to be called a mainstream sheep because my favorite band sold more than ten records. I actually like a lot of obscure stuff but I would not hate it if it became mainstream. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gemini47 Posted November 27, 2013 Author Share Posted November 27, 2013 Seriously, these hipsters (if in Brooklyn or something) are not as open minded and free as their image leads you to believe. They closely follow a recipe for being "cool" which means they are not free thinkers. They are conformists trying to fit in to a sub culture. Yea, my thoughts exactly... But darn are some of these hipster girls, cuuuuuute... I like the image for sure and their mind (at least some of them that I've had the pleasure to know). But yea there's still a hint of me being attracted to an "image", which is not good- shame on me. So, it is quite possible that your career and nice clothes are indeed turning off these closed minded conformists. I guarantee if you show up in Williamsburg with a nice wall street suit on, you get no play from the ladies there. Ha, quite possibly we went back to my nice 3 bdrm house with vaulted ceilings, big tvs, nice leather couches, tons of electronic and music production equipment... So... either confirm to the sub culture yourself, or forget the hipsters and go with girls who like sales guys. If sticking with hipsters, grow an ironic beard, get dirty and wear some rags. And next time bring a case of PBR I actually do have a beard (have had it for a while). I also don't define myself as a "sales" guy. I hate my job and only do it bc It affords me my living. All in all I just need to go out more and meet more people. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jimloveslips Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 how about un-hip girls… although I guess they'd bring your "credibility" to an all time low... Link to post Share on other sites
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