Mother and Daughter Relationships

[napy666]

My mom and I never get along much and she is always pissing me off. It's like I am nice to everyone else even my dad but my mom pisses me off the most. I guess I dislike her because she complains over everything and she's over protective and I don't know what the real reason could be really.

 

Do you guys get along with your mom?

[elbe]

Happy Thanksgiving! When I was younger I might have killed my mom if I had the chance but now that we are all getting old the trivial arguing has ceased. I wonder what your mom's problem is.. what does she complain about?

[napy666]

Happy Thanksgiving! When I was younger I might have killed my mom if I had the chance but now that we are all getting old the trivial arguing has ceased. I wonder what your mom's problem is.. what does she complain about?

 

Everything, how I don't work, don't drive, don't do stuff around the house even though I do have my own set of chores but it isn't good enough to her. It's just I don't know why we don't get along really but we do and don't at times.

[elbe]

Everything, how I don't work, don't drive, don't do stuff around the house even though I do have my own set of chores but it isn't good enough to her. It's just I don't know why we don't get along really but we do and don't at times.

 

Sounds like she feels you aren't pulling your weight. How old are you? Is there a reason you aren't working? If you are over 18 you should consider how you might act if your mother was a roomate (and not your mother).

 

i.e. a roomate would not ever do your laundry for you.

[napy666]

I'm 26, and I have been looking and applying for work. But since I got little experience no one will take me they take my friends tho. Trust me I applied to the same places my friends had but they got the jobs and not me.

[elbe]

I'm 26, and I have been looking and applying for work. But since I got little experience no one will take me they take my friends tho. Trust me I applied to the same places my friends had but they got the jobs and not me.

 

Getting a job is tough.. but helping around the house is the least you can do. When I was unemployed i found it hard to get motivated even to do housework due to depression. Wake up early, get showered and dress well. Do 25% more housework than you are now and try not to engage your mother.

[Kizza]

you are 26 and you don't work or drive. Who supports you?

 

What are your set chores around the house?

 

Why are you still living with your parents?

 

Have you considered going to school or classes and getting some skills to get a job?

[amaysngrace]

I don't mean to sound judgmental but if you were my daughter I'd be pissed off at you for not working, not driving, living at home at 26 and having a bad attitude towards me for being pissed off at you.

 

And writing tho instead of though would kind of piss me off too....

[Outsider77]

She's probably worried because she thinks you need to be independent at your age and able to take care of yourself. I think that if you made some steps towards independence she would be a lot happier.

[napy666]

Both my parents support me. I am living at home with my parents because I can't afford to get a apartment due to me not working.

 

Around the house I feed our pets, clean their dishes, pick up their poop, take out the small trashes and large trashes, re-fill the pet's food and water bowls, vacum and dust, wash the clothes, bedding, pick up the mail, re-organize the food cabinets, wash the dishes.

[elbe]

Both my parents support me. I am living at home with my parents because I can't afford to get a apartment due to me not working.

 

Around the house I feed our pets, clean their dishes, pick up their poop, take out the small trashes and large trashes, re-fill the pet's food and water bowls, vacum and dust, wash the clothes, bedding, pick up the mail, re-organize the food cabinets, wash the dishes.

 

You might need to have a crucial conversation with your mother when you are getting along and just ask, "What can I do to help out more around the house?". You might also want to take the opportunity to thank her for supporting you through tough times...

[napy666]

Yeah you're right. I think I'm not doing too badly really.

[DaisyLeigh1967]

You should be job hunting every day and doing all cooking and cleaning to pay for your room and board.

[napy666]

I don't like cooking and I have been job hunting online. Most stores say apply online a lot of the time I walk into the stores.

[Absinthe]

I don't get along with my mum either, and tbh I don't know why other posters are giving you a hard time here...

 

I am 25, I moved out at 18 and now that I live on another continent 7,000 odd miles away I am about as moved out as you can get...but I still don't get on with my mother. I visit home as often as I can, and still my mother manages to wind me up about trivial things. I am home for two weeks right now, and she hasn't spoken to me for the past 4 days thanks to a small argument we had about Facebook of all things.

 

My parents have done a lot for me, I always thank them and have shown my appreciation by being as independent as possible (a favour from my mother is a loaded gun so asking for one is unwise), never needing to be bailed out, taking them out for dinner when I see them and generally doing the best I can...I know that they are proud of me but BOY do parents have a special knack for making you feel like the worst, most selfish, ungrateful child there is.

[napy666]

I don't get along with my mum either, and tbh I don't know why other posters are giving you a hard time here...

 

I am 25, I moved out at 18 and now that I live on another continent 7,000 odd miles away I am about as moved out as you can get...but I still don't get on with my mother. I visit home as often as I can, and still my mother manages to wind me up about trivial things. I am home for two weeks right now, and she hasn't spoken to me for the past 4 days thanks to a small argument we had about Facebook of all things.

 

My parents have done a lot for me, I always thank them and have shown my appreciation by being as independent as possible (a favour from my mother is a loaded gun so asking for one is unwise), never needing to be bailed out, taking them out for dinner when I see them and generally doing the best I can...I know that they are proud of me but BOY do parents have a special knack for making you feel like the worst, most selfish, ungrateful child there is.

 

It's like we try our best but it's still not good enough. :/

[ThatsJustHowIRoll]

DO I like my mother? Nope. But then again, her and her second husband used to physically abuse me as a teenager, so that kinda messed up that relationship.

 

We talk now. She thinks Im a great daughter and pretends like nothing ever happened. My kids love her, so I am cautious but have contact.

 

I'll never forgive her, and I don't like spending time with her either. She complains I never call her, but meh, not my problem. She made her bed.

[nescafe1982]

I don't like cooking and I have been job hunting online. Most stores say apply online a lot of the time I walk into the stores.

 

I agree with the general tone of the posters here. You are 26 and living at home, rent free. I don't think your mother is off in resenting your attitude, and if you were my child, I'd be asking you for rent money.

 

If you don't like cooking, that's tough. You should be approaching this question as "what more can I be doing to help?" and instead you sound like "why won't she stop asking me to help?"

 

Take the wake-up call. Keep looking for work, daily. And in the meantime, understand that your parents decision to let you stay with them is a blessing, not an entitlement.