vlg560 Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Hi All, I just need your opinions on this please. My ex-gf of 2 years went through GIGS and dumped me for another guy 3 years ago. I have had totally no contact with her ever since. The thing is, since last year she has been keeping in touch with my mom through texting. On occasions like Christmas, birthdays and such she'd text my mom greetings and stuff. And just a month ago my mom told me that my ex was asking about me and how I've been doing. It has not affected me at all, the only thing I'm wondering about is why does she keep doing that? She also tried contacting my best friend through Instagram. What do you guys think is going through her mind? I am still on NC and will never break NC. All I'm curious about is why she's doing this. Link to post Share on other sites
elbe Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Congratulations you've found a class 5 stalker. Does she want you back? Maybe. Maybe she just doesn't want you to ever move on with another girl. Link to post Share on other sites
Author vlg560 Posted December 4, 2013 Author Share Posted December 4, 2013 Thanks for your opinion elbe...do you think its just an indirect way of her trying to check on me, and if I've already found another girl? Its kinda weird because after that GIGS experience she put me through, until now I still don't have much interest in having a relationship. I'm kinda fearful of the same thing happening again with another girl. Link to post Share on other sites
CptSaveAho Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 tell your mom to change her number i get these attempts as well... same boat/timeframe etc as for the relationship thing, i agree 100%... mine was may 2011... have/had 0 desire to even date let alone think about a relationship Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Thanks for your opinion elbe...do you think its just an indirect way of her trying to check on me, and if I've already found another girl? Its kinda weird because after that GIGS experience she put me through, until now I still don't have much interest in having a relationship. I'm kinda fearful of the same thing happening again with another girl. Your ex sounds really selfish and if she's talking to your mom it's because she wants something from her. I wouldn't worry too much about her motives if I were you. It's not about you anyhow. Here's an article on how to spot a selfish person. It's sad that she mistreated you but not every person is selfish. She is though. How to Stop Selfish People from Hurting You - Lovepanky Link to post Share on other sites
ynabna Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Hi All, I just need your opinions on this please. My ex-gf of 2 years went through GIGS and dumped me for another guy 3 years ago. I have had totally no contact with her ever since. The thing is, since last year she has been keeping in touch with my mom through texting. On occasions like Christmas, birthdays and such she'd text my mom greetings and stuff. And just a month ago my mom told me that my ex was asking about me and how I've been doing. It has not affected me at all, the only thing I'm wondering about is why does she keep doing that? She also tried contacting my best friend through Instagram. What do you guys think is going through her mind? I am still on NC and will never break NC. All I'm curious about is why she's doing this. Hello, um it could be just literally F***** with you like people above me saying, but she might want you to be back or she found out how much you really cared about her. However, that doesn't justify her wrongdoing. Its all up to you but she might contact you b/c she regrets, misses, and wants you back. It's just another guess. Link to post Share on other sites
CC12 Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 You dated for two years. Three years ago, you broke up. One year ago, she started chatting with your mother. One month ago, she asked your mother how you were doing. Is that right? If so, then I don't think this has anything to do with you. She probably just likes your mom as a person and enjoys casually chatting with her and wishing her well on her birthday. I honestly don't think she's doing anything wrong. I mean, she waited two years before contacting your mom. That seems like a very appropriate amount of time. She probably thought you were over it by now. Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 I'm kinda fearful of the same thing happening again with another girl. vlg: This is what I would be concerned about, not the actions of an ex. Your ex wants to keep tabs on you in case her dream guy doesn't come around and she needs someone to settle down with later. She is keeping you in the loop thinking you will be available to her later. Ask your mom to ignore her. Don't let the actions of one silly girl make you fearful of pursuing a relationship. If you do this, you are letting her live in your head rent free and she wins in the end because you are still single and available to her if/when she changes her mind about settling with you. Ask a girl out and start living your life again without letting emotional baggage determine your future. Best, Grumps Link to post Share on other sites
Author vlg560 Posted December 4, 2013 Author Share Posted December 4, 2013 CptSaveAho, yeah being here on LS has been a great help in teaching me how to cope and learn to put myself first, keep busy and keep myself occupied to the point that like yourself, I really have no desire to be in a relationship...I've also learned to accept and take whatever life has in store for me and make the most of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author vlg560 Posted December 4, 2013 Author Share Posted December 4, 2013 amaysngrace, you're right she was a selfish person. Thanks for the link to the article. It was a very good read. During the course of our relationship I really didn't see her as being a selfish person. I saw her as a sweet, down-to-earth soft-spoken girl, and that was what I really found attractive about her. I would have never expected her to do what she did to me, and later on that was when I realized how extremely selfish she was. Link to post Share on other sites
Author vlg560 Posted December 4, 2013 Author Share Posted December 4, 2013 ynabna, thanks for your response...yup your guess is as good as mine, I really don't know if she still thinks about me or wants me back or what, but at this point I really don't care. I just keep thinking that if she didn't give a crap about my feelings when she dumped me, why should I even consider taking her back if she ever contacted me again? I've learned to love myself first, do what makes me happy, and keep NC for as long as it takes. Link to post Share on other sites
Author vlg560 Posted December 4, 2013 Author Share Posted December 4, 2013 CC12, that's right...actually my mom knows the whole story and everything about the breakup, GIGS etc... but in spite of that, she just responds cordially whenever my ex texts her and doesn't comment or voice out any opinions about the breakup. She just plays along whenever my ex contacts her and just tries to be nice to her. I've just been curious as to the reason why my ex keeps doing this, but I couldn't care less. Link to post Share on other sites
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