in love with married woman. Ugh.

[RightThere]

I love her very much. And yeah, she is hot and sexy and I love ****in' her. Love it. And I love her. Everything about her is amazing. It's not just sex it's real. If it was just booty I'd just tap that for dayzzz and move on to the next one. I love her and I want to give it a go.

 

As long as her kids aren't there full time.

 

You're in love with the image, not the woman. Move on.

[MasonJarTeaDrinker]

Dang I feel you I have a GF and I'm in love with another girl that has a GF also and she's so damn hot the sex is great, we talk and laugh, hug have fun and IDK what to do I feel stuck, so good luck man hopefully you figure it out soon.

[whichwayisup]

Yeah, we both feel the same way. She is figuring it all out with how to divorce and get custody of the kids- she doesn't want to be a part time mom. And I would never ask her to choose between me and her kids. But she's tired of her marriage and they've been separated for about 3 weeks. Problem is, is that we still have to have our relationship in the shadows, like we're some criminal ninjas or something. It's tiring. I love her. I want to scream it. Not continue to feel like I'm her dirty little secret.

 

Why on earth is she wanting to screw her husband out of shared custody? WTF.

 

Does he know about you and the affair? You sure they are 'separated'? Or is that a line.

[whichwayisup]

I've been cheated on in the past. I know that it's not ethically sound to be doing this. But it started with pretty clear boundaries. She was hot. I'm hot. She wanted to bang and we did. But then it just kinda took off I guess.

 

I have no doubt that I'm a major problem for their "marriage" but it's not all my fault. Her hubby is a jerk and abussive to her. So.... Yeah, I'm not really gonna shed a tear on his behalf.

 

That's got to be the biggest line of bullcrap that BOTH MM and MW tell their AP's, that they are being abused at home by their spouse. If she was being abused, why hasn't she left yet? Taken the kids OUT of that abusive household years ago? Gone to a shelter? Divorce? Nope, she goes and cheats, has an affair instead. A real way of making a so-called abusive situation home even better (being sarcastic there).. If he is that abusive, having an affair only puts herself and the kids lives in danger!

 

Good luck man, you're gonna get your heart broken when you find out this all has been just an affair and an escape on her end.

[RickFox]

Hmmmm... you face a similar situation that most single affair partners face.

 

1. The MW has to make a decision that you are more important to her than being a full time mom to her kids. She won't get full custody. As difficult as that decision is for married men I think it is way more difficult for women. The weight of that decision is the reason so many single OW/OM get strung along for so long. It is much easier to have the AP on the side than to make such a life altering decision.

 

Here is the tricky part. If she does end up making that decision it can't be because of you. If it is because of you you might as well run to the tattoo parlor the very next day and get a tattoo across your forehead that reads, "This Will Never Work!" Your best bet is to leave her alone completely until her divorce is finalized. That way she can make her decisions outside of the affair fog with clear head. Otherwise when she starts questioning her decision when she is missing this or that holiday or event or whatever with her kids resentment will start growing towards you, especially after the 'honeymoon is over.'

 

2. You don't really know each other. You know each other within the affair bubble, but that is nowhere close to reality. You both get to see all of the good and very little of the bad. At your age you probably barely know yourself. Are you really ready to be a stepfather to two kids and all that entails? They may resent you for breaking up their family. Then what?

 

I'm just going to put it bluntly. No matter how hot she is you are taking your free-caring/free-wheeling/fun-loving young life and placing yourself into a very treacherous position that will most likely end very very poorly. All for what, because you love her and she is hot? Too much baggage that you do not need to deal with at this point in your life.

Truer words could not have been said. I'll even go further and say when the chips are down she will NOT choose you and you'll be left standing around with nothing but a dumb look on your face. she will not choose you over her children or the stability of her oh so abusive home life...... which is a crock. you are the excitement to a mundane life, nothing more.

[c0nfusedm98]

Thanks for all your advice and comments.

 

I am contemplating slowing it down a bit until she is divorced. Lately when her hubby has her kids, she stay's with me. Maybe we shouldn't do that just so soon.

 

I don't know how I can really "slow it down" but I might give it a try.

 

Thanks.