How to Kill Shyness, Develop Sense of Humor and have a better social life?

[sarbunoemi]

When I was little, I was the typical extravert girl who wasn't afraid to share her opinion and stood up for herself etc.

When I gone to school, in all those 4 years, the teacher was very cruel to me, she yelled at me very much, even beat me because "I had the longest hair in the class" just because she used to drink very much and whenever she got the chance, she would yell at me with no apparent reason or sometimes she used to pull my hair, slap me etc.

After my first 4 years of primary school, I have become anti social, shy, anxious etc.

In 5th to 8th grade, my classmates bullied me because of my religion and my nationality. Because of that, I started to make solitary activities like learning a new language and working out. I was proud of myself because I lost 10 kgs in 5 months (I was fat back when I was in primary school).

I enjoyed doing things by myself because there was no one to judge me or criticize me.

In high school, my perspective changed. I wanted to have friends.

I have read many articles about how to be popular, sociable, interesting etc.

I love to meet new people now. I find very easy to start a convo with a stranger , boy or girl, whatever the case - I apply all those necessary tool in maintaining a good convo: eye contact, smile, being interested, share opinions, confidence etc.

In front of my classmates, i can't seem to act confident because I always were labeled as "shy", "antisocial" and it would be weird to be sociable with them in a few days...

What should I do? How can I change my behavior towards my classmates? We are together since 3th grade and I find it really difficult to open up because they always knew me as the "shy", "introvert" person.

[jeremy2125]

Use what you learned on them. They will see a great change that you have made to yourself. Think of what you can be if you started to open up to them. They all probably think you're the mysterious person in the corner and that will make them more curious. Your classmates have not approached you probably because you seem unapproachable. Perhaps you throw an unresponsive behavior? That definitely scares people away. If I saw an unresponsive person ,I would be deathly afraid of approaching them. I wouldn't know what to expect if I did. Im pretty sure want to get to know you but have perhaps given up on the idea. Talk to them!!!

[d0nnivain]

Join a group called ToastMasters or take a series of classes at the Dale Carnegie institute.

[sarbunoemi]

I invited my classmate shopping and since then that classmate even invited me to her birthday party. I was so happy.

Well, my classmates see that I am afraid regarding any interaction with them so probably they don't approach me.

 

Thank you for your advice!

[BOREDouttaMymind]

some people are annoying and have no filter and say whatever they want.

 

you have too much of a filter. you have a huge hepa filter in your head. you have to turn some of it off.

 

im sure when youre in a crowd, someone says something and you want to respond, but you catch yourself and say nothing, right?

 

next time, tryyyyyyyyyyyyy to say something. anything. start small.