Tamera Posted January 23, 2001 Share Posted January 23, 2001 For those of you in love... please describe to me what you feel and WHY you love your partners. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 23, 2001 Share Posted January 23, 2001 Boy, am I waiting to see this!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Yumi Posted January 23, 2001 Share Posted January 23, 2001 That's not exactly an easy question to answer... if you're really in love I don't think you really have a concrete reason. I mean what am I supposed to say, "I love my boyfriend because he makes a lot of money and has pretty eyes?" If anyone would answer like that it's not love... When you're in love, the world looks different... and if you haven't been there it's hard to describe it to you... I don't know if you're asking because you're NOT in love and want to know how it feels, or if you want to know if what you feel is the same as everyone else, or for some kind of statistic! It's probably different for everyone, but for me, my heart feels like singing, seeing other couples together doesn't give me a feeling of hurt or wistfulness but one of happiness, everytime I think of the future I naturally include my boyfriend in my dreams and plans... unless something changes that, I see us being together forever... to me I guess that's love, although words are so inadequate to express it!!! I can't say why I love my baby either.... I feel safe when I'm with him. He makes me feel beautiful, sexy, and vute. He inspires me to be a better person. I love to watch him play with babies. If we're together, doing absolutely nothing is still fun... but it's more than that. I'm sorry but I don't think anyone can realyl answer this question adequately because of the restrictions of language... love isn't just about being happy or having good sex or even seeing a future with someone... it's sometihng that goes beyond... ^_^ Link to post Share on other sites
Yumi Posted January 23, 2001 Share Posted January 23, 2001 That's not exactly an easy question to answer... if you're really in love I don't think you really have a concrete reason. I mean what am I supposed to say, "I love my boyfriend because he makes a lot of money and has pretty eyes?" If anyone would answer like that it's not love... When you're in love, the world looks different... and if you haven't been there it's hard to describe it to you... I don't know if you're asking because you're NOT in love and want to know how it feels, or if you want to know if what you feel is the same as everyone else, or for some kind of statistic! It's probably different for everyone, but for me, my heart feels like singing, seeing other couples together doesn't give me a feeling of hurt or wistfulness but one of happiness, everytime I think of the future I naturally include my boyfriend in my dreams and plans... unless something changes that, I see us being together forever... to me I guess that's love, although words are so inadequate to express it!!! I can't say why I love my baby either.... I feel safe when I'm with him. He makes me feel beautiful, sexy, and cute. He inspires me to be a better person. I love to watch him play with babies. If we're together, doing absolutely nothing is still fun... but it's more than that. I'm sorry but I don't think anyone can realyl answer this question adequately because of the restrictions of language... love isn't just about being happy or having good sex or even seeing a future with someone... it's sometihng that goes beyond... ^_^ Link to post Share on other sites
Curious Posted January 23, 2001 Share Posted January 23, 2001 For those of you in love... please describe to me what you feel and WHY you love your partners. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 The feeling IS the reason for being in love. That's the bottom line. It cannot be described. The closest thing is a feeling of euphoria, of incredible well-being, a heaviness of heart, a longing to be with the beloved. It's simply the greatest feeling there could be. The very sad part of it is that there is no human or scientific way that the person we love can ever understand fully how we fell. No matter how much we tell the beloved that we love them, they will never know. They can never feel what we feel precisely...maybe not even close. Therefore, there must be a mutual love in order for the union to be complete. That way, both people have a similar feeling, inside themselves that they themselves produce because of their thoughts about the beloved. It really does get complicated but love is actually one of the most selfish emotions we feel. When we love someone, we are loving the feeling mostly. The person can be a real a**h***...but love, being blind, will cause us to overlook that fact entirely. Love is selfish because we seek to retain that feeling at all costs, often to the detriment of the beloved...who may not share those kinds of feelings. We seek to selfishly keep them around and in our lives because WE want to continue feeling those euphoric feelings that we, ourselves, have produced. OK Link to post Share on other sites
Tam Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 Okay, Yep, I got the whole feeling thing...... but, why do you love your partner. What do they do that makes you think that you love them. I want to know WHY you love them....why could you not love someone walking past your car...or in the supermarket... Does anyone get what Im saying......? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 Love is basically a decision we make based on the data we consider. We love another person primarilly because of the way we feel when we are around them or when we think of them. I think you sometimes fall in love with someone when they possess qualities that you seek out subconsciously. Freud called it your ego ideal. This person you love may be the very wrong person for you. They could be highly abusive...but if your subconscious is programmed that love comes through abuse, you have found your love. Or they could resemble someone you loved in the past. Or they could possess some qualities you have dreamed of finding in someone...even though other aspects of them could be a nightmare. There is no logical explanation for why we would love one person and not another. But I can absolutely tell you we are able to love many people in our lifetimes, romantically, if we allow ourselves. Without making this real complicated, we fall in love with someone because of the way they make us feel when we are around them. If we feel important, cared for, loved in return, excited, stimulated, etc., etc., all the ingredients will be there for us to fall in love. And when we no longer have those feelings...when we no longer get great feelings when we are around a person...when they treat us poorly or dishonor us in some way...we lose that love. Many times we continue being with someone out of fear of being alone, laziness, for financial considerations, etc. even though they make us feel like crap. That's not love at all. Link to post Share on other sites
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