crazimonkey Posted January 2, 2005 Share Posted January 2, 2005 Ok last year my ex b/f forced me into his house 2x the first time he just pushed me in and successfully raped me. He tried it a second time but pulled a knife to my neck he wasn't successful the 2nd time b/c I knee'd him and ran. I didn't tell anybody until it was too late. But last night i was hanging out with my b/f, my b/f's sister, her b/f, my brother, his girlfriend, and the rest of his "family" (he was adopted). Well they started talking about my ex, but nobody except for my brother and boyfriend knew what happened to me. My boyfriend knew that i was already mentally unstable about it. Well they started talking about him but i got flashbacks so i said "can we please stop talking about him" and they didn't listen. I started getting really bad... and this past September to like November i was suicidal and cutting myself... well i'm really trying not to go back to doing that and that really didn't help... I don't know how to handle what he's done, I obviously can't change the past. Does anybody have any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted January 2, 2005 Share Posted January 2, 2005 First, you need to get counselling. You may be suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress and you can't just fix that by yourself. Secondly, it's not to late to have him charged and jailed. He might use his knife on the next woman if he's not stopped. Link to post Share on other sites
Pendawn Posted January 3, 2005 Share Posted January 3, 2005 You definitely need to seek some help. Go and see your doctor and tell him/her about your cutting and suicide and they will be able to find some great understanding speciliasts to help you through this. Unless the guy is dead it's not too late to do something about it, report him to the police, and even IF you can't get him arrested for this horrific crime (though i am sure you will be), at the very least please tell your fmaily and friends. You have nothing to be ashamed about, and I'm sure they would feel bad knowing they are hurting you by bringing him up. They can't help you if they don't know. Also the more people that eventually know about this, the more likely it is that you could save the life of some other poor woman who dates him. Please get help you shouldn't have to deal with something as horrible as this on your own. Link to post Share on other sites
GirlDown Posted January 3, 2005 Share Posted January 3, 2005 what if you just say "hey guys, he's my ex for a reason and i really don't want to talk about him, ok?" if they don't stop, walk away. i had to do the same thing before. i am sorry about your situation. Link to post Share on other sites
Author crazimonkey Posted January 3, 2005 Author Share Posted January 3, 2005 ok now it's not only rape i'm handling my b/f was just forced to break up w/ me, my brother and dad are screaming at each other, and i'm getting worse as the day goes on! Link to post Share on other sites
Barby Posted January 3, 2005 Share Posted January 3, 2005 Originally posted by crazimonkey ok now it's not only rape i'm handling my b/f was just forced to break up w/ me, my brother and dad are screaming at each other, and i'm getting worse as the day goes on! Why was your Boyfriend "forced" to break up with you??? Link to post Share on other sites
Author crazimonkey Posted January 3, 2005 Author Share Posted January 3, 2005 b/c my problems are going to become the families problems according to his mother. When even if we aren't going out he's still there for me! Link to post Share on other sites
Barby Posted January 3, 2005 Share Posted January 3, 2005 Maybe I'm dumb or just not getting "it" but why in the world would your problems become the family's problems? And how old are the two of you, why would he let his family tell him who he can and can't date? Link to post Share on other sites
Author crazimonkey Posted January 3, 2005 Author Share Posted January 3, 2005 i am really not sure! Link to post Share on other sites
Barby Posted January 3, 2005 Share Posted January 3, 2005 You didn't really answer my questions and since you're basically being so vague it's pretty hard how to advise you. That's okay though, I'll make do.... With what you've experienced in the past with your ex and being unable to talk about it and getting irrate when anyone mentions him...you're probably better off without a relationship right now. You need to take some time to get some help/therapy with dealing with your feelings about what happened to you...if you feel guilt/anger/sadness/rage/fear....whatever it is you're feeling needs to be expressed and you need help to work through it. No matter how long it's been you still have the right to go to someone about it, if you don't wish to get him in trouble that's okay too..just worry about you and making yourself heal inside...until you deal with this and heal yourself you won't be whole again and it will be difficult for you most likely in future relationships as well. Good luck! ~Barby Link to post Share on other sites
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