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Talking to her


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I know this one is a pretty common problem...I'm going to try to make it as general as possible.

 

There's a good female friend of mine who I really like, as more than a friend. She's currently single, but I know she isn't interested in me in the same way. Still, I feel like I really need to tell her how I feel, even if it hurts our friendship, because I'll go insane otherwise.

 

What's the easiest way to talk to her about it, that won't make her too uncomfortable, and won't make me seem too pathetic?

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You wouldn't want to tell her so much unless you had some crazy outside hope that if you did she might respond. You say there's no way she's interested -- and yet you'll die unless she knows.

 

So -- tell her. Realize this might impact the friendship. It's going to leave you feeling vulnerable. And, when she turns you down (if, as you say, that's inevitable), rejected. You'll need to pull back on the contact until this doesn't hurt so much. You'll have to work on accepting the "no."

 

She may or may not handle it well. In my experience, most people put a little more distance up or ignore the knowledge altogether. I think it's likely that that's the worst you can expect. I hope so, anyway, because I've been where you're at.

 

But, sometimes you just have to take a chance, even when it's a crazy outside one. That's love.

 

Good luck --

 

uriel

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