Help for a "casual Christian"

[gridiron]

For most of my life, I have believed in Christ and still do so today. My mother is a Catholic and my dad believes in Christianity, but not one particular sect, but neither ever were or are very passionate or spiritual about God or Christ. There were a couple of years where we went to church on a regular basis, but it did not last and since I was fairly young at the time, I don't know how much I really got out of it.

 

The trouble is that I want to believe deeply and passionately, and at this time, I can't really say that my faith is that strong. I do not pray or think about Jesus daily. I do not go to church. I pray on occasion, when I really want God's help with something. This does not feel like the true faith I want to have. I feel like I am using it only when it is convenient.

 

There are a few roadblocks I have run into in the past. First of all, I approach everything in life with a scientific and unbiased mind. I don't want to change that. But I think sometimes it has blocked me from pursuing a deeper relationship, such as wondering if anyone truly hears me when I pray. Second of all, some of the friends and acquaintances in my life who call themselves Christians do not seem to follow many of His teachings that closely. And they do not seem very passionate or spiritual to me either. Thirdly, I consider myself a conservative and a moderate Republicans, but get turned off by a few politicians and those representing the more fanatical religious right who want to dictate how all Christians and everyone should act and believe. Fourthly, I believe if something is worth doing, it is worth doing all the way, and when I have read the Bible or other sources on how a Christian should live, I think there is no way I can do everything that is asked of a Christian. I realize that maybe I don't need to be perfect, but wouldn't it be wrong to know a certain teaching, such as no premarital sex, and knowingly go against it?

 

The things that have furthered my faith, or at least my desire to do so, have been viewing the Passion of the Christ, reading The Purpose Driven Life, reading Les Miserables, and talking to fellow Christians who have a deep faith in the Lord, but respects others as well. The Passion was a reminder of why I truly love Christ. Many of the characters in Les Mis, though fictional, depict the type of Christian I want to be. I have read most of the Purpose Driven Life and was impressed by the sound reasoning and beliefs espused in the book (which I will re-read when I have some more time). I have read all of the New Testament at one time or another, but it has been a while since I sat down and really read it and tried to comprehend its teachings.

 

The reason I am posting here is because I have seen several posts by those who do have a deeply spiritual belief in Christ. I have read some of the beliefs they have and advice they have given and really admire what they have to say. One of my New Year's resolutions is to deepen my relationship with Christ, and I am looking for any suggestions anyone may have or any comments. I plan on re-reading the Purpose Driven Life and the Bible when I get a chance. Is it important for me to choose a sect or church? If so, are there any good resources that have a fairly simple breakdown of the differences that will allow me to choose which church to go to?

[Moose]

What you're experiencing is fantastic!!! You've a long road ahead of you. Sounds to me that you're facing the regular problems, and doubts that many new Christians struggle with.

 

The only advice that I see myself giving you is for you to remember, you're stomping on dangerous grounds, and you're very vulnerable. Your scientific and unbiased mind is the chink in your armour that Satan will use to get to you. You're a young child when it comes to your Spiritualism, and very weak. Once you study and allow the Truth to take root in your soul, Satan will have a tougher job in swaying you away from God. Once you accept Christ as you Saviour, then you'll have the most powerful ally known to man, and the job gets a lot easier.

 

As far as looking on other Christians and modeling yourself after them, that's a huge mistake. Never worry about how your brethren are walking. Worry about you. Just because my Pastor says one thing, doesn't neccessarily mean that I have to believe excactly the same way. Your Spiritualism should be a personal experience. Continue praying and ask for guidance......not neccessarily from others, but from God Himself. You're hearing the knock at the door.....all you have to do is let Him in.

 

When you do, it'll be a lot easier for you see where God wants you to go to Church, and how He would like to see you live your life.

 

Good luck to ya, and I hope to call you my brother some day soon!

[RowanRavyn]

There is a very cool little book called

 

More than a Carpenter By Josh McDowell.

 

Here is a link to his website:

http://www.josh.org/

 

It might be a good place to start. He is a man who went on a search to prove Christ was a fake, and proved to himself that he was real.

 

I would also suggest anything by Max Lucado. He has a gift for making the life and teachings of Christ real and practical. He has many books (my favorite is Applause of Heaven), as well as an inspirational study bible, and a series of bible studies.

 

Good luck on your journey.

 

My one personal bit of advise:

 

Your relationship with Christ is a PERSONAL thing. It should not be dictated by the forced teachings of others. This is your journey and no one elses. If you really wish to do this, put aside looking at "fake Christians" (these friends that you say aren't following the teachings of Christ), or people that you discern to be doing less than a good job at it, and focus on YOU.

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by gridiron

First of all, I approach everything in life with a scientific and unbiased mind. I don't want to change that. But I think sometimes it has blocked me from pursuing a deeper relationship, such as wondering if anyone truly hears me when I pray.

A lot of people suffer from the misconception that religion and science are enemies. They are not. Plenty of great minds were Christian, and a lot of intellectuals did work on applying the scientific method to religious study. I think you should look less at the more abstract forms of Christianity that encourage ignorance, and apply the rigor you apply towards life towards your faith as well.

 

Additionally, doubt is not an imposition to faith. If you're doubtless, your faith is just a statement of naivete. The fact that you can maintain faith in the face of doubt is a testament to the strength of it.

Thirdly, I consider myself a conservative and a moderate Republican

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, but that I can't help you with. All I can say is that we should love you for who you are, and that it's possible that it's genetic or something.

Fourthly, I believe if something is worth doing, it is worth doing all the way, and when I have read the Bible or other sources on how a Christian should live, I think there is no way I can do everything that is asked of a Christian. I realize that maybe I don't need to be perfect, but wouldn't it be wrong to know a certain teaching, such as no premarital sex, and knowingly go against it?

Barter with God.

 

Change the world with love and kindness. Become an example of Christ's teachings. Find an injustice, and fight it.

 

If you're busy fixing God's problems on Earth, I think he'll let the sex slide?

Is it important for me to choose a sect or church?

I think having a religious community is helpful. However, often times you limit yourself when you choose a sect. Many of the newer forms of Christianity are designed to interpret the Bible for you, which can be dangerous if their interpretation conflicts with what you know in your heart to be right.

 

I hope to see more of you.

[quankanne]

Is it important for me to choose a sect or church? If so, are there any good resources that have a fairly simple breakdown of the differences that will allow me to choose which church to go to?

 

I've spoken with many Catholic converts throughout the decade I've written for a church paper, and one thing I heard over and over was that coming into the Church was "like coming home." they felt accepted, they felt everything they ever believed but didn't know how to put into words or thoughts come together. Finding a church home – whether Catholic or Protestant (also Christian, just not Catholic) – that you feel comfortable in, where your intrinsic beliefs are shared, is very important. It pretty much feels like home, so to speak.

 

don't know if any of the Protestant churches do something similar, but the Catholic church offers something called RCIA (rite of Christian initiation for adults), which is a year-long program where inquirers learn more about Christianity and how the Catholic church exhibits that belief. Pretty much an "everything you ever wanted to know about the Church" kind of program. I know I've seen publicized in the local papers different seminars at different churches, seminars that address morality, spirituality, church history, etc. Keep your eyes open for something that appeals to you -- or even do a websearch of a particular church (Methodist, Episcopalian) and do a little research on their faith formation or religious education programs. Every church has some kind of Sunday school, where someone teaches a class about the particulars of their faith.

 

other good reading material? read about the lives of the saints, biographies about religious leaders, by theologians, even by Christian authors like GK Chesterton or CS Lewis .... even JRR Tolkien incorporated spirituality in his LOTR trilogy, and there is a book of letters he'd written that talks not only about his writings, but their spiritual basis. I don't recommend the guys who wrote the "Left Behind" series because while their goal is noble, they fall short by trying to scare people into relationships with God, and that's not how to form a Christian. Thomas Merton, who wrote "the new seeds of contemplation" is a title that comes to mind; St. Therese of Lisieux, even Mother Teresa (sorry if most of my suggestions are Catholic, they are the ones I'm most familiar with). I've heard from several people that Billy Graham, the evangelist, also does a bang-up job in presenting Christianity to others.

 

you might also arrange to meet with ministers or priests from different local churches to find out how to learn more about their churches.

 

good luck, and don't give up in your spiritual quest. It might take awhile to find what you've been looking for, but along the way, you'll learn much.

[RowanRavyn]

Oh yes, Billy Graham is amazing.

 

If you seek you will find.

[gridiron]

When I referred to some of the more spiritual posters on this board I really respect, I had all of you and a few others in mind, so I am not surprised that you guys are the ones that want to help me out, and it is greatly appreciated.

 

What you're experiencing is fantastic!!! You've a long road ahead of you.

Yes, I know, I have put it off for too long. I have to start somewhere, and I hope I have the patience and willpower to stay on this trek.

 

As far as looking on other Christians and modeling yourself after them, that's a huge mistake. Never worry about how your brethren are walking.

I think you are right. I have too often looked at others instead of looking at just myself.

 

There is a very cool little book called

 

More than a Carpenter By Josh McDowell.

 

Here is a link to his website:

http://www.josh.org/

 

It might be a good place to start. He is a man who went on a search to prove Christ was a fake, and proved to himself that he was real.

Thanks, I will add him and Max to my list of suggested reading, and hopefully will get to it soon. I really like Rick Warren's book too and want to finish that first. So much reading to do! But the descriptions of both of these authors and books sounds like what I am looking for.

 

This is your journey and no one elses. If you really wish to do this, put aside looking at "fake Christians" (these friends that you say aren't following the teachings of Christ), or people that you discern to be doing less than a good job at it, and focus on YOU.

Good point. When I look at some people who talk about Christianity and have a holier-than-thou attitude, I sometimes think, if that's an example of a good Christian, then that is not what I want, as I believe my morals and beliefs are stronger than theirs, even without supposedly knowing Christ as well as they do. But then I look at other Christians who I think do live their lives in accordance to His teachings, and it drives me to want a deeper and more spiritual understanding of Him. When I think about it, you guys are right, I definitely should stop looking at other Christians deciding on what I want to do based a very random sampling of a small number of Christians.

 

The fact that you can maintain faith in the face of doubt is a testament to the strength of it.

Well said, that hit home and makes sense.

 

it's possible that it's genetic or something.

Very nice. Actually, my parents are Democrats, so I don't think that's it.

 

I've spoken with many Catholic converts throughout the decade I've written for a church paper, and one thing I heard over and over was that coming into the Church was "like coming home."

That's something to think about, thanks for all the other helpful info. The Catholic program you mentioned sounds like it would be very helpful. I do think I want to do some reading first and really find what beliefs I do have and see how they fit in with the different churches. But yes, eventually, I do want to find a church and a home for myself.

 

--

 

Whew, so much helpful advice, you guys are awesome. The last thing I thought I would get here when I first signed up was help on my spiritual life, but having taken several spins around this place, I found that there are many here who can help me with this. I guess when I thought about loveshack, I was thinking love between girlfriend-boyfriend and betweens spouses, but the greatest love of all was that which Jesus showed to all of us when he went to the cross.

 

I am not on here much and mostly lurk anyway, but I appreciate the helpful advice and will not hesitate to come here if I need some more guidance and direction along the way. I hope my faith will be as strong as everyone's here and I can "pay it forward" and help someone else find the path someday in the future.

[7on]

I would also like to say that reading the bible is fantastic. I try and read one chapter a day. Very good insight about everything. Also what I feel is good is to pray everynight before sleeping. It's mostly closing my eyes and saying the prayer mentally. Sometimes I speak when I'm very passionate about what I'm praying about. It also may help, if you want to get out of the habit of treating prayer like you're asking for stuff, if you pray about other people's well being. I know it makes me feel better knowing I care enough about that person to be including them in my prayers.