Amelia81 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 I am not really an OW, my married boss drunkenly kissed me a few weeks ago, but fortunately he's not pursued anything and on the surface appears forgotten about but I've been an OW before and the situation has stressed me out a bit as I can't understand it. I'm afraid to admit I did have a nosey at his W FB page, to see what she looked like mainly. I'm not friends with him on FB or anyone at work for that matter. I only saw two pics though, one was of just her, a professional one she had done and he had liked it, which made me think he is attracted to her still. But then you read into it how you want because then i flip it and say to myself, 'but that was six months ago and I wasn't working with him then!' to try and make myself feel better. I have a 'friend' on FB who from first few weeks of dating someone had been gushing about her new fella day after day after day and he rarely liked her status about him, so I was expecting it to crash and burn but a year down the line it's still the same and they are still together so whilst we try to find 'meaning' behind what they do on FB I guess it really doesn't mean anything. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HollyGolightlly Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 My MM had put a photo of him and his wife and kids up a few days before he got me pregnant. Looking back now...what..was I thinking? Sigh...idiot. I don't even look at what he does now online. His wife cyber stalks me to the max, though and it's borderline funny and partially sad. Facebook doesn't mean anything- I used to get along with my boyfriend on FB when all the while we would be going through bad times. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted December 19, 2013 Author Share Posted December 19, 2013 My MM had put a photo of him and his wife and kids up a few days before he got me pregnant. Looking back now...what..was I thinking? Sigh...idiot. I don't even look at what he does now online. His wife cyber stalks me to the max, though and it's borderline funny and partially sad. Facebook doesn't mean anything- I used to get along with my boyfriend on FB when all the while we would be going through bad times. Wow. I think you've just convinced me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted December 21, 2013 Author Share Posted December 21, 2013 My friend just texted me this and I have never talked to her about this! LOL http://imageshack.us/a/img689/1542/mye5.png Link to post Share on other sites
angie2443 Posted December 21, 2013 Share Posted December 21, 2013 This whole idea of using facebook to judge the state of a MM's (ex boyfriend's or whatever) relationship seems like high school mentality to me. The idea of checking to see if the couple "like" each others posts on facebook also seems silly. Maybe I've just never been that into facebook. I rarely "like" my husband's facebook posts. I don't need to. I talk to him on a regular basis and we share our ideas, thoughts, opinions often. I would guess that most healthy, happy people don't use facebook to put on a big show of how perfect their life is, or, to talk smack about their partners. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Amelia81 Posted December 21, 2013 Share Posted December 21, 2013 My friend just texted me this and I have never talked to her about this! LOL http://imageshack.us/a/img689/1542/mye5.png Haha I love this! It is so going on my facebook wall. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GreySkyMorning Posted December 22, 2013 Share Posted December 22, 2013 It makes no difference. My xmm posted on his wife's fb page about what an understanding great wife he had about two weeks before he was coming on to me on Facebook. And the whole time we were together, he never commented or liked her page, while telling me he loved me and wanted to be with me , but in the end, he still stayed married to her after dday. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted December 22, 2013 Author Share Posted December 22, 2013 This whole idea of using facebook to judge the state of a MM's (ex boyfriend's or whatever) relationship seems like high school mentality to me. The idea of checking to see if the couple "like" each others posts on facebook also seems silly. Maybe I've just never been that into facebook. I rarely "like" my husband's facebook posts. I don't need to. I talk to him on a regular basis and we share our ideas, thoughts, opinions often. I would guess that most healthy, happy people don't use facebook to put on a big show of how perfect their life is, or, to talk smack about their partners. The couple I questioned is really into facebook. Both of them. Link to post Share on other sites
Cocochai Posted December 23, 2013 Share Posted December 23, 2013 Thanks. Yeah I'm not on there much, but from the little I've seen, this is how most married couples act with each other on there to me. I was just wondering what the norm was. A lot of it is to impress and show the friends and family how "Great" their marriage maybe. I use to be FB friends with my MM and it was horrible seeing how fake it was from him in a way. Sure I know he loves his wife and family but, on the flip side you can clearly see him living a double life. The wife setup his FB page.. Needless to say that's how we actually connected. Anyway, a year leater he told me she found evidence that he was cheating and they were having arguments back and forth but... Of course she posts everything great except that she think he's cheating on her. (why would she though)?? In the end I eventually kicked him off my FB page because it was too much. He told me he has to make it look good because the friends and the family are on there and that we should have never been friends on there. Naturally I wouldn't go by peoples relationships on FB. Folks who post everything on FB just love the attention and bragging rights most of the time. I mean it's okay to show the world you love your family of course but I truly believe it was a way for his BS to keep her head in the sand. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
hayleym Posted December 23, 2013 Share Posted December 23, 2013 My AP and I text a lot. Sometimes all day and night, but other weeks its almost silent where we don't text much at all. I used to really wonder about that, but ended up finding out he will often go weeks without texting his wife at all, even when she's texting him and actually texts me more than her. I never even considered that. Just assumed that he was using the pull back to hint to me he needed a break.. I'm not saying that means they have a horrible relationship, it's just texting, but it made more sense why he goes silent sometimes. He was honest when he said he just hates texting and social media. I just thought that was a cop out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted December 23, 2013 Author Share Posted December 23, 2013 A lot of it is to impress and show the friends and family how "Great" their marriage maybe. I use to be FB friends with my MM and it was horrible seeing how fake it was from him in a way. Sure I know he loves his wife and family but, on the flip side you can clearly see him living a double life. The wife setup his FB page.. Needless to say that's how we actually connected. Anyway, a year leater he told me she found evidence that he was cheating and they were having arguments back and forth but... Of course she posts everything great except that she think he's cheating on her. (why would she though)?? In the end I eventually kicked him off my FB page because it was too much. He told me he has to make it look good because the friends and the family are on there and that we should have never been friends on there. Naturally I wouldn't go by peoples relationships on FB. Folks who post everything on FB just love the attention and bragging rights most of the time. I mean it's okay to show the world you love your family of course but I truly believe it was a way for his BS to keep her head in the sand. What kinds of things would she post? Did he ever "like" her posts? Link to post Share on other sites
BrokenPrincess Posted December 23, 2013 Share Posted December 23, 2013 My xMM has a fb but hasn't posted or commented on anything in a few years, although he lurks regularly & likes pictures posted by friends & fam. He'd had the same family pic as his profile for at least a year. He'd never added a cover photo but finally did during our A, one that I picked out that had a funny meaning to us. A few months after he ended it, he changed his profile pic to a happy one of just him & W on vacation and his cover photo to the whole group at dinner. I don't know if I was reading too much into it, but I took that as a sign to me that he was in love with his W and family and was over me and completely done with us. Link to post Share on other sites
Cocochai Posted December 23, 2013 Share Posted December 23, 2013 What kinds of things would she post? Did he ever "like" her posts? Everything from her announcing he needed icy hot to her wanting to kick his a$$ for saying her new hairstyle was just okay lol Yes he liked her pics and comments but then again, he also liked mines when we were friends on there. He would tell me everything going on from his job to the family stuff and she would leave encouraging words on his FB page but he would call me to tell me how the outcome was. Just don't read too hard when it comes to relationships on FB. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted December 23, 2013 Author Share Posted December 23, 2013 Everything from her announcing he needed icy hot to her wanting to kick his a$$ for saying her new hairstyle was just okay lol Yes he liked her pics and comments but then again, he also liked mines when we were friends on there. He would tell me everything going on from his job to the family stuff and she would leave encouraging words on his FB page but he would call me to tell me how the outcome was. Just don't read too hard when it comes to relationships on FB. Okay, thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
cocorico Posted December 23, 2013 Share Posted December 23, 2013 Does he click "like" on things she posts? She did not have FB during the A. He and I listed ourselves as being "in a R" with each other. After we M, she got FB. Our profiles are both visible to friends only, so she could not see them nor search for them. She did try to "friend" several of our friends, though - one, who had known her through work, did accept the request initially but then later blocked her because she felt like she was being used to spy on us. (We both have her blocked, too.) If she had had FB during the A, I imagine their interaction would have been like IRL - completely separate, no interaction. Link to post Share on other sites
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