Run50 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 My fiancé has an18 year old neice that he says " looks like a super model". When we are together with his family, they wrestle. He will pick her up over his shoulder, and she likes to wrap her arms around him from behind, and he will bend forward taking her feet off the floor- she is lying on his back. Oneinstance i recall she had a strapless mini dress on. If we are in line at a movie- she gets under his arm and embraces him while I just stand there. They behave this way at restraunts, hospitals, it does not matter. In our home- she sits beside him from the moment she arrives until she leaves. All of her friends try to engage him in this behavior. He reciprocates. I asked him to stop all the touching, and poking, and picking up. And he has cut way down. But he tells me I am jealous and just need to get over it. Am I being unreasonable? Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Yea, it's weird to me. I've seen this a few times with other people and it gives me the creeps a bit. But I try not to judge cause some people were raised different and show their affection different. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Run50 Posted December 19, 2013 Author Share Posted December 19, 2013 I try to be nice. I try to understand that this is what they have always done. But after 2 or 3 hours of non stop wrestling, I get annoyed. She is not 12 anymore. How many 45 year old men do thythis? If you do- please give me your opinion!!! Link to post Share on other sites
GoreSP Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Wow. You are jealous of his niece. seriously... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Run50 Posted December 19, 2013 Author Share Posted December 19, 2013 Her mom ( his sister) encourages it. He has played with her this way since she was born. She has two brothers. One Is 20, one 23. They have grown up conversations. I lean towards an opinion that he just doesn't know how to relate to her any other way. The other family membermembers are alwasalways asking them to stop. He's 45........ She is usually the one that starts it- one of her friends told him to stay with the two of them forever...... Meaning his niEce and the friend. I've come in thy o his life and they really don't like the interference. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Run50 Posted December 19, 2013 Author Share Posted December 19, 2013 Is it OK for a 45 year old man to hold an 18 year old in a head lock on the couch with his leg over her so she can't move- for 2-3 minutes? In that strapless minidress? Link to post Share on other sites
emva07 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 that's disgusting. What a perv. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Run50 Posted December 19, 2013 Author Share Posted December 19, 2013 Is it OK for a 45 year old man to hold an 18 year old in a head lock on the couch with his leg over her so she can't move- for 2-3 minutes? In that strapless minidress? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Run50 Posted December 19, 2013 Author Share Posted December 19, 2013 Give me more- I'm getting everything from he's wrong in this yo I'm just jealous. If you think its wrong, please tell me more........ Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Wow. You are jealous of his niece. seriously... I hear what you're saying. However, incest is far more common than people realize. A simple google search will reveal that to you. Most estimates assume that between 10 and 20% of people are or were involved in voluntary incest relations. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TylerDurdenn Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 That is seriously messed up. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
emva07 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 What do you want us to say ? Incest is real. Heck there are fathers getting with daughters out there so this not something out of this world. If you think that at 45 yr old does not get the least bit turned on by having an 18 yr old pinned down, running her young and barely legal tits and vagina on him, then idk what we can tell you. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Op, your fiance's behavior is both gross and totally inappropriate. And creepy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 Incest is weird and taboo. I have a hard time wrapping my head around it. However, I also consider myself to be open minded. If two single consenting adults are willing to do something, who am I to judge them? The reality is, statistically speaking, every person on this forum knows or has known someone that is or was involved in incest. We just didn't realize it. Sorry to thread jack, OP. Not saying this is happening to you. Just saying your doubts are not unfounded and don't let people say "they're related therefore you're crazy to think that". 2 Link to post Share on other sites
emva07 Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 I go up to my uncle to wrestle in a mini dress and my mom would go and grab me off by the hair in a heartbeat , kick my uncle out , and my family wouldn't ask why. If he had a fiancé and she dragge me off my Mom wouldn't even fight her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
InnocentMan Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 It's a bit creepy, but some families are like that. Your bf, being the 45yr old adult, shouldn't be encouraging it, especially if he knows you are uncomfortable with it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sidney2718 Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 It's a bit creepy, but some families are like that. Your bf, being the 45yr old adult, shouldn't be encouraging it, especially if he knows you are uncomfortable with it. This is truth. Since you are uncomfortable with this and given that it won't stop on its own, you will have to sit down with the 45-year old boy and have a serious deal-breaking talk with him about it. I'm sorry, but you can't live with this. Link to post Share on other sites
firemanq Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 I had little contact with my sister, her daughter and granddaughter until about 10 years ago. All 3 ladies live in the same house, no men. The granddaughter was about 9 or 10 when we re-connected. She was always clingy and touchy feely. Then my sister got a boyfriend. He commented to my about the granddaughter being clingy and touchy-feely. It made the both of us uncomfortable. Nothing sexual, but it was constant. She would wrap herself around either of us. But there were no men except us around the 3 of them. Last week, the child is now 19 and has a boyfriend. Her bio dad has made contact with the child and now the child is not at all clingy. She has grown up some and having 2 male figures has been good for her. I have noticed similar actions from other girls w/o a male in their life. I expect the 18 year old will change soon and not be so touchy. I would keep an eye on the two of them. It would be easy for the contact to cross the line and the child to be hurt. Link to post Share on other sites
GoreSP Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 I hear what you're saying. However, incest is far more common than people realize. A simple google search will reveal that to you. Most estimates assume that between 10 and 20% of people are or were involved in voluntary incest relations. I hear what you're saying. But incest isn't fun. The victim doesn't like it and is being threatened... If her niece was victim of incest, I can't imagine she would be so playful with him. Link to post Share on other sites
GoreSP Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 Also I'd like to add there is a huge chunk of the story missing. Basically, what OP is saying is that she is annoyed her fiancé has physical contact with an 18 year old who 'looks like a super model' and wears a mini dress. And from the kind of physical contact described, I just don't see the sexual nature of it. You know, my 45 year uncle once kneeled in front of me and said my skirt was too long and he pulled it up. I was about 13. THAT is of a sexual nature and disgusting. What OP is describing isn't, in my opinion. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 I hear what you're saying. But incest isn't fun. The victim doesn't like it and is being threatened... If her niece was victim of incest, I can't imagine she would be so playful with him. I'm talking about two consenting adults. Not a forced situation. i thought I made that about as clear as I possibly could. Link to post Share on other sites
MasonJarTeaDrinker Posted December 23, 2013 Share Posted December 23, 2013 I'm on the edge on this one, for all we know that's how they get a long and does he do this with any other family members? However he does find her hot and probably does this just to be able to touch some hot girl, I would probably think that it's the latter one that he does it for. He makes you feel dumb by saying "Are you jealous of my niece so that he can keep doing it and you already know this is the truth. Link to post Share on other sites
Debanked Posted December 23, 2013 Share Posted December 23, 2013 Probably not incest but sounds like pervert behavior. Karma will strike when the niece gets a boyfriend and he beats the uncle's ass. Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted December 24, 2013 Share Posted December 24, 2013 Wow bizarre replies. I wrestle with my half sister who's turning 17 and I have for years, nothing wrong with that. Doesn't mean I have any urge to sleep with her. Your boyfriend should probably be smart enough to limit it when you're around though as it's perfectly resonable you're getting jealous of him having so much physical contact with another female, relative or not. Link to post Share on other sites
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