Dealing with major loneliness...

[Inflikted]

As a 25 year old guy who's never had a relationship, it's getting harder and harder to deal with the overwhelming sense of loneliness I have. I've never had a girlfriend, I've never been in a relationship, I've never had sex or done anything even remotely physical with a girl. I've only ever even been on a small handful of dates, with girls I weren't particularly attracted to but who were available to me to date, and I never had a good time on any of those dates.

 

Thing is, I have a hard time becoming personally attracted to a girl. In the last seven or so years, there have only been two girls I've actually wanted to date, and neither were interested in me that way. Some may call me "picky", but I'm just attracted to very specific combinations of things in girls, and I don't find that very often. I can't really help what I'm attracted to, yanno?

 

Over the years, I've been becoming more and more lonely and frustrated. I constantly see people around me who date, and have relationships, and fall in love, and experience intimacy with another person, and I just wonder why I can't have that, too. Some days, all I can think about is how I wish I knew what it was like to have an awesome lady in my life who I could talk with, laugh with, think with, go on adventures with, cuddle up with, have sex with.

 

I'm much more interested in the mental/ emotional aspects of having a partner, and I crave that a lot, but I'm also really starting to crave the physical aspects in a big way, too. So not only do I feel incredibly lonely in a mental/ emotional way, but I also have to deal with a growing desire for physical intimacy now, as well.

 

I just feel... bad, and I don't know how to deal with these feelings, these desires that are going unfulfilled. So, I guess I'm just wondering how to quell these desires, both for mental/ emotional intimacy, and physical intimacy. I don't anticipate having a partner any time soon, probably not even within the next five years at minimum, so I'm going to need to learn how to deal with it somehow.

 

For what it's worth, I don't really have any close friends, just some acquaintances. I've also attempted online dating quite a lot, but it's never worked out for me, and I'm at a point where I don't even find girls on there that I feel interested in enough to write to.

[winny]

Can completely relate to this...

I have a lot of friends but still I feel so goddamn lonely sometimes...

 

I wish so badly at times to have someone who loves me... But it's not happening... N it really hurts when I see others... But I try to be happy n positive... I do get attracted to many guys n guys show interest in me but I don't feel anyone out of them really loves me... I miss that

[Teraskas]

I can totally relate to your post. :/

My one and only wish is to have that which money cannot buy...love. (Maybe true to a certain extent related to prostitutes. )

I just can't stand the constant public displays of affection being shoved into my face when I walk out the door. A constant reminder of 'Hey, you remember that emotion you've been looking for for so long ? It's not going to happen, lol.' despite the fact that I work so hard to try to achieve it.

 

It's extremely difficult to stay positive, hoping that at least one woman will show interest in me, but as it is right now, chances are minimal to nihilistic to say the least. The last 3 weeks though, I've more or less accepted the fact that I'll never find anyone, despite my age of 22.

I don't know why, but somehow it feels like a wave of peace and tranquility overwhelmed me.

Online dating is a joke, as a guy your best bet is to stay out of it.

On 95% of the dating sites it's nothing but an uphill battle where the odds are stacked against you. MUCH more men than women on there.

[rakram]

@Inflikted

 

I am your carbon copy, please to meet you! lol

 

I can 100% relate with your pain. And you know what's worse? Imagine you finally found someone you like, she also showed interest in you, but then you **** up everything because you are scared to death of losing her! Check my thread regarding my one such experience.

[NGC1300]

I'm 29 and completely empty inside. Not a virgin, but haven't had a real GF in over 10 years. I've come realize just how deceitful and shallow so many women are. And yet, I still desire their affection. WTF is wrong with me.

[pulsar]

I know how you feel Inflikted, I'm 25 and in the same exact position as you. All I've done is always focus on my work and nothing else. I wouldn't know where to begin, only few days ago I realized that I too need love, affection, and intimacy in life. What I can say is that don't lose hope, be open to meeting and getting to know women (even though you may be picky, I'm the same way - rarely a woman catches my eye).

 

I've pushed that side of myself to the side because I though school and work was more important and now I realize this is equally if not more important. Be positive, not just within your heart but how you interact with people. Be strong…!

[Beast_117]

I can totally relate to your post. :/

My one and only wish is to have that which money cannot buy...love. (Maybe true to a certain extent related to prostitutes. )

I just can't stand the constant public displays of affection being shoved into my face when I walk out the door. A constant reminder of 'Hey, you remember that emotion you've been looking for for so long ? It's not going to happen, lol.' despite the fact that I work so hard to try to achieve it.

 

It's extremely difficult to stay positive, hoping that at least one woman will show interest in me, but as it is right now, chances are minimal to nihilistic to say the least. The last 3 weeks though, I've more or less accepted the fact that I'll never find anyone, despite my age of 22.

I don't know why, but somehow it feels like a wave of peace and tranquility overwhelmed me.

Online dating is a joke, as a guy your best bet is to stay out of it.

On 95% of the dating sites it's nothing but an uphill battle where the odds are stacked against you. MUCH more men than women on there.

Same here..I used to dwell on it so much I would literally just think about "I wish I had a gf".."I'm so lonely" all the time then around last year I just stopped caring and it's good to have that load off my mind. Though it still creeps up every now and then.