Tell me how to find someone.

[Mrlonelyone]

Simple question those who have read this board for a long time know my situations pretty well.

 

 

What should I do to find someone? Simple question.

 

 

I'll just sit back and listen to constructive advice.

[Softie]

I keep asking a similar question

[AnyaNova]

I was Hopiing that you could tell me. :-p

[d0nnivain]

You have to do things out of your comfort zone. If you are always around the same people, do something to meet new people. Try a combo of the following:

 

 

OLD

 

 

Meetup.com -- don't pick the singles sites; pick the hobby sites so you have something in common

 

 

Go to business networking events

 

 

Try Speed dating

 

 

join a gym (or a different gym) or vary the times / days you work out

 

 

take or teach a class

 

 

join an interest based singles group. There is a really active ski club around here. I liked one group that played board games & another where I could bring my dog

 

 

Volunteer somewhere to do something you are passionate about: save the whales, politics, hospice, environmental groups. . . whatever .. . just make it something you care about

 

 

Tell people that you know that you are interested in being fixed up; you really don't know who knows somebody who may be perfect for you

 

 

On that note, I read on one of these boards that some guy had posted "help me find a GF" on his FB page. Many of his friends had people they wanted to set him up with

 

 

Smile & look around when you get your morning coffee; vary where you get your coffee

 

 

Don't each lunch at your desk; check out the "neighborhood" where you work. Granted this works better in cities than in more isolated areas, but who knows who is in the building cafeteria or outside on the picnic benches

 

 

Try a singles travel group; there are singles cruises offered all the time. This is unlikely to produce a LTR but you never know & you may have fun

[verhrzn]

To answer that question, we'd need to know what you've tried first.

 

Have you tried online dating? What are your hobbies? How do you spend your free time? How is your social circle? What sort of girl are you looking for-are YOU the type of person that sort would date?

 

These all needs answers before we can offer much in the way of advice.

[Mrlonelyone]

To answer that question, we'd need to know what you've tried first.

 

 

 

 

 

I thought over the years of posting on here that was all laid out by now.

 

 

 

 

Have you tried online dating?

.

 

 

Yes, lots. but no one I've met and had anything more than a couple of dates with has been from that.

 

 

 

 

What are your hobbies?

.

 

 

Biking for fun and fitness, traditional Native American gardening, Video Games, Genealogy.

 

 

 

 

How do you spend your free time?

.

 

 

On a hum drum daily basis? I spend much of my free time on my computer doing something or the other. Otherwise the above hobbies. I may work on a science project on the side.

 

 

How is your social circle?

.

 

 

Almost all of my social circle is composed of other scientist, science students, , friends from the LGBTQIA community, long time friends and family. Almost all of the people I know who are my age are married or have a LTR with children (even the LGBTQUIA ones).

 

 

What sort of girl are you looking for-are YOU the type of person that sort would date?

.

 

 

What the women I've dated have in common is that they are all tomboyish. They are all accomplished in some way commensurate with thier ages.

They are all as my aunt put it "international flavors". They are not just plain unhyphenated American let alone my particular racial mix (this has cused some angst for them).

 

 

I have zeroed in on a type I like who are receptive to me. Tomboyish, accomplished, fit, not knock outs but not hideous, educated women. I am also open to men as I am bisexual they tend to not be so different than the women. The women I date are ok with that. I have also been with a couple of transmen (female to male). I am attracted to a certain mentality that can be found in a male or female body.

 

 

 

By virtue of having dated them Id' say yes I can attract them.

 

These all needs answers before we can offer much in the way of advice.

 

 

Those are all things I have done. I'm asking what should I try that I haven't?

[felicity1]

 

Simple question those who have read this board for a long time know my situations pretty well.

 

 

What should I do to find someone? Simple question.

 

 

I'll just sit back and listen to constructive advice.

 

 

This may seem ridiculous to you and therefore not constructive, but if you believe in a "higher power", ask her/him/it to guide you in ways that will give you what you NEED.

[jacksi]

This is going to be a completely off-the-wall suggestion, but it sounds like it fits your interests. Have you tried international dating?

 

A few months ago I attended an Asian festival with a friend married to a nurse from the Philippines. That evening I met doctors, nurses, school teachers, business owners, college professors, and lawyers that came from a variety of Asian countries including Malaysia, China, Philippines, Thailand, Korea, and a few others.

 

Several times during the night women asked if I was interested in being introduced to their sisters or cousins in their home countries. I declined since I was not interested in a long-distance relationship, but it might fit your desires. It sounds like you enjoy women with an international flair, are educated, and interested in a long-term relationship. You might check around you area and see if there are any Asian social groups that could give you introductions to women in your area or overseas.

[Mrlonelyone]

 

This may seem ridiculous to you and therefore not constructive, but if you believe in a "higher power", ask her/him/it to guide you in ways that will give you what you NEED.

 

 

 

I did that last year. They gave me someone who is now an EX.

[Mrlonelyone]

This is going to be a completely off-the-wall suggestion, but it sounds like it fits your interests. Have you tried international dating?

 

A few months ago I attended an Asian festival with a friend married to a nurse from the Philippines. That evening I met doctors, nurses, school teachers, business owners, college professors, and lawyers that came from a variety of Asian countries including Malaysia, China, Philippines, Thailand, Korea, and a few others.

 

Several times during the night women asked if I was interested in being introduced to their sisters or cousins in their home countries. I declined since I was not interested in a long-distance relationship, but it might fit your desires. It sounds like you enjoy women with an international flair, are educated, and interested in a long-term relationship. You might check around you area and see if there are any Asian social groups that could give you introductions to women in your area or overseas.

 

 

It is my experience, and the expperience of many African Americans that international daters want white people. Unless they are from Europe. German, Austrian, Italian, Polish etc type people love black people.

 

 

In a sense I did try that... Every woman I've dated since high school has been a recent (compared to my family not even counting my American Indian ancestors) immigrant.

 

 

 

Before that African American women wouldn't give me the time of day. Either they were so churchy that they took exception to my scientific world view or they wanted outright thugs. Simply not being a push over wasn't enough, you had to have at least shot at someone to get some play from some women.

[jba10582]

Meet her under a fruit-filled palm tree where you can plan on making dates at specific times.