My bf cheated with best friend and I had an awful outburst

[Turtleluv]

It's been a week since finding out I've been cheated on my 3 year-old relationship and it was with my best friend too.

 

Though I didn't go off directly on him, I threw his cell phone, my remote control, books and plates (two of them nearly landing at his head but he ducked and it missed). He started leaving and at some point called me crazy.

 

I guess I'm crazy for having to waste all these years I'll never get back. Now is like I don't even know myself. I have never done anything like that in my life. I never meant to sound crazy. I want nothing to do with them. But did I really went crazy? I'm concerned over the fact that I let my anger get to me and everything went blank to me at that moment.

 

Lastly will this pain go away? They can both have each other all they want to but now it feels like I don't even know who to trust (except my parents and older brother) anymore.

[CrystalCastles]

Not your fault you lost it. Yeah, you might have wasted 3 years of your life with your loser of a boyfriend, but be glad it wasn't more. Double betrayal is the worst, but on the bright side, now you know who is honest to you and who is not.

[MsKenji]

Hell no you weren't crazy! He better be glad I'm not you're friend in real life because honey I would have done worse. I am very upset that he called you crazy. It's one thing to discover that your longterm boyfriend has cheated on you, but with your best friend?! Oh that is a feeling of betrayal and anguish that I wouldn't wish on anyone. You were acting out of a broken heart. Though, don't do anything else to him. Don't you dare give him the power over your actions anymore!

 

Also, the pain will go away. However, it will definitely take some time. During your time of pain I would suggest you keep to yourself. Now of course if you have other friends please continue to speak to them (don't cut them off). But what I mean is just give yourself time to recuperate. Spend at least six months being COMPLETELY single, not pursuing anyone, just having fun, trying new things!

[CC12]

But did I really went crazy? I'm concerned over the fact that I let my anger get to me and everything went blank to me at that moment.

 

Yeah, you went a little crazy and I think you should be concerned. You have every right to be angry that you were betrayed, but you cannot react by destroying property or throwing plates at people's heads. It's really unhealthy and could honestly ruin your life if you continue to let your temper get the best of you.

 

Lastly will this pain go away?

 

It will. Focus on yourself. Pick up some new hobbies or do the things that you used to do before you had a boyfriend. Call up some friends. Keep yourself occupied. Work on your emotions.

[Kizza]

Eliminate both the cheater liars from your life.

 

Leave it behind and move on, wasting any more than 3 years on this situation is even more tragic than the 3 years you invested and they threw down the toilet...

[Conners]

I'm so sorry that happened to you, it's almost like experiencing double the pain to know that the two people you could rely on and like the most can betray you like that! Please cut all ties with them, I hope you don't have alot of mutual friends with your best friend, that would be terrible! Don't let them know you're hurting anymore and let karma do its work xx

[5tu88sy]

It's been a week since finding out I've been cheated on my 3 year-old relationship and it was with my best friend too.

 

Though I didn't go off directly on him, I threw his cell phone, my remote control, books and plates (two of them nearly landing at his head but he ducked and it missed). He started leaving and at some point called me crazy.

 

I guess I'm crazy for having to waste all these years I'll never get back. Now is like I don't even know myself. I have never done anything like that in my life. I never meant to sound crazy. I want nothing to do with them. But did I really went crazy? I'm concerned over the fact that I let my anger get to me and everything went blank to me at that moment.

 

Lastly will this pain go away? They can both have each other all they want to but now it feels like I don't even know who to trust (except my parents and older brother) anymore.

 

What an *******. Say goodbye and get out of that one.

 

Depending on how you feel about him and how emotionally invested you are, it will take you some time to get over it. BUT you will get over it - trust me.

 

PS. Your reaction was very justified - he's lucky you didn't do more damage!

[ThatMan]

It does get better. I know that it is incredibly overwhelming to have your entire world turned upside down. But it does get better with time.

[Turtleluv]

Just received another apologetic message from my friend. That only just pisses me off. It just makes me wonder what if I had never found out? I'm assuming it would have kept going on and there would be no apology from her.

[d0nnivain]

You're not crazy. You were emotionally distraught. It's understandable.

 

 

You don't have to forgive or forget -- either your ex-BF or your former BFF

[Clay]

Run from those two people. Do not look back. No friend does that to you and your xBF is a real looser for saying your crazy.

 

Its going to hurt for a long time. I wont be easy to get over but the truth is you did nothing wrong. No one ever deserves this. You are a better person and they are just trying to drag you down with there horrible decisions.

 

I am sincerely sorry you are going through this. I wished there was something I could say to make the pain go away but I know there is not.

 

Clay

[samsungxoxo]

Forget those two back-stabbing bottom feeders as they both deserve each other and focus on those you trust; your family. Any so called ''best friend'' that does this, is worst than manure.

 

Don't waste anymore plates because of him. By doing that, it's giving him power; give him none. Show him that you're happily moving on and I'm willing to bet that'll get him.

[Vogeltron]

Pain is temporary, it may last for minute, an hour or a day or even a year. But eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If you give up and quit it will last forever.

[GoreSP]

It's been a week since finding out I've been cheated on my 3 year-old relationship and it was with my best friend too.

 

Though I didn't go off directly on him, I threw his cell phone, my remote control, books and plates (two of them nearly landing at his head but he ducked and it missed). He started leaving and at some point called me crazy.

 

I guess I'm crazy for having to waste all these years I'll never get back. Now is like I don't even know myself. I have never done anything like that in my life. I never meant to sound crazy. I want nothing to do with them. But did I really went crazy? I'm concerned over the fact that I let my anger get to me and everything went blank to me at that moment.

 

Lastly will this pain go away? They can both have each other all they want to but now it feels like I don't even know who to trust (except my parents and older brother) anymore.

 

Wow. Your outburst was totally justified!

Your friend deserved to have his teeth punched in.

[BlessYourCottonSocks]

I was cheated on before and I acted like you also. This is not "crazy", this is HURT. They are CRAZY for doing that to you. Friends/boyfriends don't do that.

They will feel the guilt later, let them have it.

 

From here on, please be strong though. I did things I regret after my ex from a long time ago cheated on me. I stalked them (that sounds really bad to admit), called them, harassed them, insulted them, I was soooo angry how two people could do that to me. AHH!!!

 

Now that I can look back at it in a place where I am sooo over it and better off, I'm embarrassed and will never let myself do that again. I wish I could have taken the high road, let them have at it, and IGNORE. Silence can't be misquoted and it doesn't come back to haunt you later on.

[fixing]

It's been a week since finding out I've been cheated on my 3 year-old relationship and it was with my best friend too.

 

Though I didn't go off directly on him, I threw his cell phone, my remote control, books and plates (two of them nearly landing at his head but he ducked and it missed). He started leaving and at some point called me crazy.

 

I guess I'm crazy for having to waste all these years I'll never get back. Now is like I don't even know myself. I have never done anything like that in my life. I never meant to sound crazy. I want nothing to do with them. But did I really went crazy? I'm concerned over the fact that I let my anger get to me and everything went blank to me at that moment.

 

Lastly will this pain go away? They can both have each other all they want to but now it feels like I don't even know who to trust (except my parents and older brother) anymore.

 

No, your not crazy. Tbh, its a shame that place didnt smash in his face!!

 

But, honestly, its a perfectly normal reaction.

 

You seem to be taking it really well too. Those dirty filthy cheaters can screw eachother as much as they want now the scumbags.

 

You lucky it happened now though, and not when you have kids, married etc.

 

It does get easier, but not for a long time.

 

So keep no contact and never talk to the pricks ever again. Just realise, this is all his fault, 100%.

 

Dont beat yourself up. They are the bad guys, you are the good guy.

[Space Ritual]

It's been a week since finding out I've been cheated on my 3 year-old relationship and it was with my best friend too.

 

Though I didn't go off directly on him, I threw his cell phone, my remote control, books and plates (two of them nearly landing at his head but he ducked and it missed). He started leaving and at some point called me crazy.

 

I guess I'm crazy for having to waste all these years I'll never get back. Now is like I don't even know myself. I have never done anything like that in my life. I never meant to sound crazy. I want nothing to do with them. But did I really went crazy? I'm concerned over the fact that I let my anger get to me and everything went blank to me at that moment.

 

Lastly will this pain go away? They can both have each other all they want to but now it feels like I don't even know who to trust (except my parents and older brother) anymore.

 

No you are not crazy. Under the circumstances I think your reaction was completely understandable and normal.

 

 

I see in one of your other posts that your Best friend is now trying to apologize. I would delete both of these twerps from your life if at all possible. Block their phone numbers, email addresses, and most of all social media. Making them as insignificant as possible should be your goal. Double betrayal such as this pretty much demands for the time being you have no contact with them at all...because all you are going to get at this stage is a bunch of excuses and silly apologies....as in "It just happened" "We didn't mean to hurt you"...etc. you probably already have gotten something to this effect so please do not respond.

 

And yes Time will help you to heal.....as not only does it heal all wounds, it also wounds all heels...Good Luck.

[TimL]

Perfectly understandable reaction and justified given the circumstances.

 

People do dreadful things to one another and I know that feeling of being hit by a train because it is just so shocking.

 

You have at least managed to get rid of two worthless people in one go, even if it was a horrible way to do it. The pain you feel now will one day become a distant memory.

 

And remember...we have all been in that dark place at some point, in some form. Tough times don't last, tough people do.

[MsKenji]

About that message she sent you. Honestly, at her age she knows right from wrong. And I believe there is at least a bit of genuine guilt for cheating with your boyfriend. However, this guilt was definitely not enough to STOP or even to confess. She's moreso sad that she got caught. I would say, send her a message about how you feel and then end it by saying "we're done" Within time it's it important to forgive. Though, but to forget? Hell no. That's what fools do. Let go of that negative person in your life for good. If you see her anywhere in the future be cordial (Hi and bye lol) Like I said before don't you dare give people like that power over your actions. Be strong!