wunderin Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 I've been with my boyfriend for 3 yrs. We have a child together and we've been living together for 2 1/2 yrs. It feels like we're married (to him we are except for the paper), but shouldn't he know alot about me by now. I'm very open and we've talked about our past and opinions. The other day I asked him what my middle name was and he didn't know. He guessed. I took it seriously and he didn't. Shouldn't he know by now my own middle name? I know everything about him and the reason is cause I love him and wanted to know everything about him. Am I over reacting? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 Yes, you are overreacting. I don't think it's a sign that someone doesn't love you because they don't know your middle name, or your bloodtype, or where you were born. Every person has a certain way of relating to others...certain things that are important for them to know. Since he would never call you by your middle name, an since you would drop it anyway if he marries you, why should he bother to remember it. I personally make it a point of remembering my friends birthdays and always call them or send them Email on that date. However, very few of those same friends remember my birthday and therefore don't call or acknowledge it in any way. If I enjoyed being upset, I could get really worked up about that. Instead I work harder to do something spectacular in life so my birthday will be a national holiday. Incidentally, my birthday is October 9 and every seven years in America, it's a national holiday...the nearest Monday to Columbus Day. All the banks, post offices and government buildings shut down...just for Columbus (and me, too!!!) I guess it could really piss me off when my friends would observe the birthday of some Italian explorer they never new, not even realizing it was also their good friend's birthday as well. But I work very hard not to upset myself...it just seems pretty foolish for me to go out of my way to make myself feel bad. By the way, my middle name is Nicholas and I would pay people to forget that. Link to post Share on other sites
Ed Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 Yes, he probably should know. And I have a feeling that he will start calling you by your middle name very soon. With all due respect, please DON'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY! His not recalling your middle name is no reflection of you. It does not say anything about you or how he feels about you. My feeling is that there may be some other things going on that are bothering you and you decided to pick this as a reason to have an argument, when you really want to fight about something else altogether. Instead of getting all bent out of shape about this (if you are), have some fun with it or turn it into something funny. For instance: Have one of your friends call the house when he is at home. Make him answer the phone, and have your friend ask for you, by your middle name. Then when he calls you to the phone, tell him there is nobody by that name living here! (with a big grin, of course). Or, go to a T-shirt shop and have him a T-shirt made that says on the front "Does the name (your middle name) mean anything to you?" and on the back "Well, it does to me!". Get the picture? Link to post Share on other sites
wunderin Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 Thanks for the advice. I guess I'm just in a negaive slump right now, but you do make sense. I will remember your b-day, mines in October too. As for your middle name, it's better than his (Clorien) whatever it was . Thanks Yes, you are overreacting. I don't think it's a sign that someone doesn't love you because they don't know your middle name, or your bloodtype, or where you were born. Every person has a certain way of relating to others...certain things that are important for them to know. Since he would never call you by your middle name, an since you would drop it anyway if he marries you, why should he bother to remember it. I personally make it a point of remembering my friends birthdays and always call them or send them Email on that date. However, very few of those same friends remember my birthday and therefore don't call or acknowledge it in any way. If I enjoyed being upset, I could get really worked up about that. Instead I work harder to do something spectacular in life so my birthday will be a national holiday. Incidentally, my birthday is October 9 and every seven years in America, it's a national holiday...the nearest Monday to Columbus Day. All the banks, post offices and government buildings shut down...just for Columbus (and me, too!!!) I guess it could really piss me off when my friends would observe the birthday of some Italian explorer they never new, not even realizing it was also their good friend's birthday as well. But I work very hard not to upset myself...it just seems pretty foolish for me to go out of my way to make myself feel bad. By the way, my middle name is Nicholas and I would pay people to forget that. Link to post Share on other sites
wunderin Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 Ed thanks alot for your comic relief. It makes sense and thanks for the little jokes. Thanks for the time. Yes, he probably should know. And I have a feeling that he will start calling you by your middle name very soon. With all due respect, please DON'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY! His not recalling your middle name is no reflection of you. It does not say anything about you or how he feels about you. My feeling is that there may be some other things going on that are bothering you and you decided to pick this as a reason to have an argument, when you really want to fight about something else altogether. Instead of getting all bent out of shape about this (if you are), have some fun with it or turn it into something funny. For instance: Have one of your friends call the house when he is at home. Make him answer the phone, and have your friend ask for you, by your middle name. Then when he calls you to the phone, tell him there is nobody by that name living here! (with a big grin, of course). Or, go to a T-shirt shop and have him a T-shirt made that says on the front "Does the name (your middle name) mean anything to you?" and on the back "Well, it does to me!". Get the picture? Link to post Share on other sites
sparkle Posted January 24, 2001 Share Posted January 24, 2001 As for your middle name, it's better than his (Clorien) whatever it was . Thanks "whatever it was"? And you're complaining about him not knowing your middle name???? geez Link to post Share on other sites
wunderin Posted January 25, 2001 Share Posted January 25, 2001 I was talking about Tony's. Read what I was replying to instead of ASSuming you know the whole story. "whatever it was"? And you're complaining about him not knowing your middle name???? geez Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 25, 2001 Share Posted January 25, 2001 Sparkle is a nice lady and she was only engaging a little levity...which is always good for us. Link to post Share on other sites
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