Changing My Name And Surname

[Bearx]

My Dad isn't the best Dad in the world. Nor is he the worse. But, for what he done to my Mum is not what an ideal Husband should do. Cheating, drinking alcohol to the extent of getting into arguments with his Wife near his kids, gambling etc. I know it's not just his fault. Of course not. heh... To ruin a marriage it takes two people. I'm sure my Mum also done something that turned the tables around in their marriage. But, as a kid, I was really fine with it. It's their marriage after all. Plus, I still got to see my Dad regularly. So, I was really fine with it. Well...I think I was.

 

Anyways, I want to change my name and surname when I'm 18. ^^; I'm not doing this because I hate my present and my past. I just want to start anew. Start a new adventure. I know that changing my name and surname won't change everything. I'll still have the memories of my past. But, I can start again with these memories, accept them, and focus on the future I want to create for myself.

 

But, my Dad wont let me change my name and surname. He thinks that I'm disrespecting him, his family and everyone I've ever known. He also believes that it's not in our culture and that I'm 'influenced' by my friends... I don't have any friends. I did. But, that's another story, huh...?

 

My Step Sister and my Mother also believe that it's not in our culture. They say, "How many of our people have you seen that changed their name? No one. It's not in our culture". They soon talk behind my back saying that I'm 'Crazy' and 'Psychologically messed up'. I don't understand. It's my life. I'm not going out there and committing a crime. My Dad even went to the point of disobeying me as his daughter if I ever done this. I just want to create my own path and see where it leads me. I just want to start again.

 

Is this something wrong to do? I'm not really sure on what I should do. I still have a year and a 1/2 left to decide if this is the best option for me. So...please help me.

[terra]

See how you feel in a year and a half. A lot can change. As you said, changing your name won't change the things you have to deal with, however if you feel like the symbolic change would help you move on then do what makes you happy.

[Bearx]

See how you feel in a year and a half. A lot can change. As you said, changing your name won't change the things you have to deal with, however if you feel like the symbolic change would help you move on then do what makes you happy.

 

Thank you. But, I guess you're right. I'll wait for a year and a half until I fully decide. Anything could happen. ^^ Thank you again.

[SincereOnlineGuy]

My Dad isn't the best Dad in the world. Nor is he the worse. But, for what he done to my Mum is not what an ideal Husband should do. Cheating, drinking alcohol to the extent of getting into arguments with his Wife near his kids, gambling etc. I know it's not just his fault. Of course not. heh... To ruin a marriage it takes two people. I'm sure my Mum also done something that turned the tables around in their marriage. But, as a kid, I was really fine with it. It's their marriage after all. Plus, I still got to see my Dad regularly. So, I was really fine with it. Well...I think I was.

 

Anyways, I want to change my name and surname when I'm 18. ^^; I'm not doing this because I hate my present and my past. I just want to start anew. Start a new adventure. I know that changing my name and surname won't change everything. I'll still have the memories of my past. But, I can start again with these memories, accept them, and focus on the future I want to create for myself.

 

But, my Dad wont let me change my name and surname. He thinks that I'm disrespecting him, his family and everyone I've ever known. He also believes that it's not in our culture and that I'm 'influenced' by my friends... I don't have any friends. I did. But, that's another story, huh...?

 

My Step Sister and my Mother also believe that it's not in our culture. They say, "How many of our people have you seen that changed their name? No one. It's not in our culture". They soon talk behind my back saying that I'm 'Crazy' and 'Psychologically messed up'. I don't understand. It's my life. I'm not going out there and committing a crime. My Dad even went to the point of disobeying me as his daughter if I ever done this. I just want to create my own path and see where it leads me. I just want to start again.

 

Is this something wrong to do? I'm not really sure on what I should do. I still have a year and a 1/2 left to decide if this is the best option for me. So...please help me.

 

 

I know a girl who did this, for very similar reasons, I'm sure.

 

She's now a successful adult with a happy family and she never looked back.

 

 

Perhaps doing so will afford you the proper 'distance' from which you might later be able to repair your relationship with your father, at least to a passable degree.