Author emva07 Posted December 31, 2013 Author Share Posted December 31, 2013 (edited) Em, These guys you describe don't seem like they are very socially adept. In fact they sound very socially inept. Lanky white nerdy guy who says he only dates black women? That's close minded and very red-Flaggy. If you're hot, men will notice it. I would notice it. Your friends more or less just sound very stupid and inexperienced. They sound disrespectful. Furthermore, you need to examine why you need their approval when they themselves are below your league? You want them to like you? Why, if they are such disrespectful chauvinists? red-flaggy? how? Keep in mind that's what he likes and follows like a sad puppy....but he's never been with one. Well one of them was an acquaintance up to recently, but a couple months ago he had a party at his place and I got to talk to him (which I never did) and he was very interesting and funny and we have a lot in common. After that I guess I just saw him differently and thought I'd give it a try... I guess after that party, he saw me as a friend, lol. I talked to the other friend to tell him those are not conversations you have infront of a female and he said he was very sorry, that it wasn't his intention to hurt my feelings, that he thinks I'm a gorgeous girl but he is not going to fawn over me in my face like he does to others. I told him I knew that wasn't the intention but that it hurt my feelings because obviously that conversation was had with a guy i like. And that the emphasis they put on Mary is ridiculous, like they have talked about hot girls before and it's whatever but with Mary I can't bring up her name because BOOM, they start glorifying her and it becomes uncomfortable, I have nothing to contribute to that conversation. Yes, she is hot, I don't disagree, is she God's gift on earth? no. Is this a conversation to be had in front of another girl? no. Edited December 31, 2013 by emva07 Link to post Share on other sites
Teraskas Posted December 31, 2013 Share Posted December 31, 2013 This is exactly the reason why guys come on here "oh boo hoo why do nice guys finish last? I can't get a girl" You have perfectly good women in front of you but you're set one one type of girl. I notice nerdy guys do this a lot more. They are set in their mentality of hot that they don't want to break away from it. You have Phoe on here too, gorgeous girl, but her friends are too stupid to realize it and pine over "hot" women to her instead all the time. Probably too busy masturbating after they spend all day gaming to pictures of unrealistically hot looking women dressed in anime costumes. They're loss, but by the time they realize it, she'll be making someone else happy. I dunno, but I'm gonna slightly call bs on this. You're right to a certain extent. I know a lot of dudes who are single because they have these ridiculously high standards and are so dead set in their ways that nothing will sway their view from those requirements. On the other hand, you have guys such as myself who constantly take the initiative, yet receive no attention / reciprocation whatsoever from women. There are no available women in my life. 95% of those that are around already have bfs, and the remaining 5% rejected me because they're not looking for anything / just got out of a relationship / etc. despite the amount of effort I make to meet women. Personally, I have a few 'must haves': - Doesn't do drugs / Doesn't smoke. - Doesn't have children, but is open to having them in the near future. - Is actually OPEN to having a relationship rather than not having a clue what she's doing on a dating site, or JUST looking for friends. - Is capable of wearing high heels (Although this comes across as a foot fetish which it clearly isn't. Instead I formulate it as a woman having 'class' / looking classy.' ) - Can support me in difficult times. (I found out 2 years ago that I had cancer on the same day that I was dumped. Now when women ask for something personal about myself, I try not to bring it up anymore because I get labeled as 'broken', etc.) Are those standards really SO frowned upon ? It seems that I am living proof of 'a nice guy who finishes last'. (and is apparently cursed lol) Link to post Share on other sites
Author emva07 Posted December 31, 2013 Author Share Posted December 31, 2013 I dunno, but I'm gonna slightly call bs on this. You're right to a certain extent. I know a lot of dudes who are single because they have these ridiculously high standards and are so dead set in their ways that nothing will sway their view from those requirements. On the other hand, you have guys such as myself who constantly take the initiative, yet receive no attention / reciprocation whatsoever from women. There are no available women in my life. 95% of those that are around already have bfs, and the remaining 5% rejected me because they're not looking for anything / just got out of a relationship / etc. despite the amount of effort I make to meet women. Personally, I have a few 'must haves': - Doesn't do drugs / Doesn't smoke. - Doesn't have children, but is open to having them in the near future. - Is actually OPEN to having a relationship rather than not having a clue what she's doing on a dating site, or JUST looking for friends. - Is capable of wearing high heels (Although this comes across as a foot fetish which it clearly isn't. Instead I formulate it as a woman having 'class' / looking classy.' ) - Can support me in difficult times. (I found out 2 years ago that I had cancer on the same day that I was dumped. Now when women ask for something personal about myself, I try not to bring it up anymore because I get labeled as 'broken', etc.) Are those standards really SO frowned upon ? It seems that I am living proof of 'a nice guy who finishes last'. (and is apparently cursed lol) no...those are all very reasonable requirements. Good for you for giving it a shot with women and not just sitting back wondering why you're single when there are plenty of women out there. Link to post Share on other sites
Teraskas Posted December 31, 2013 Share Posted December 31, 2013 no...those are all very reasonable requirements. Good for you for giving it a shot with women and not just sitting back wondering why you're single when there are plenty of women out there. Good to hear. Still, doesn't make it any easier when I constantly get bombarded with that question at family gatherings though. Link to post Share on other sites
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