Jules78 Posted December 29, 2013 Share Posted December 29, 2013 It's almost like if I had known that he'd move on so quickly I would've stayed with him. I can't believe it's been less than 2 months and he's already married to someone else. Was he that desperate? Were his feelings for me a lie? Does he just need a warm body next to him no matter who it is? I can't turn my feelings off like that! I'm trying to date someone but I'm comparing him to my ex and I'm finding myself not ready to date. How is he ready to not only date but marry?? Both of their Facebook pages show they met on the same day that I broke up with him for good (I found out he cheated in Oct and in Nov decided I couldn't get past it). I'm mind blown by it all. I'm obsessing over it and him. I haven't contacted him at all and wouldn't. I just struggle with his moving on to marriage so fast when I feel like I have a long way to go. We were together almost 3 years. I'm depressed. Link to post Share on other sites
Kizza Posted December 29, 2013 Share Posted December 29, 2013 so sorry you are going through this. It must be tough. It seems perhaps he had emotionally checked out of your relationship a very long time ago and it took him ages to end it with you. He has caused you more heartache This could be why easy for him to move on. For you it'd been 2 months but it has been longer for him perhaps. Maybe give yourself more time before you date. Find yourself first and get to know yourself as an individual again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jules78 Posted December 29, 2013 Author Share Posted December 29, 2013 No way he emotionally checked out when he was still sending me flowers and professing his love for me. We had just spent two incredible weekends together when his ex informed me he cheated with her. The day I broke it off for good he was still begging for forgiveness and and telling me he would wait for me to change my mind and how he was so sorry and there would never be another like me. I think he checked out (gave up) when I told him no for good. That was barely 2 months ago. I'll never understand why it was so easy for him to move on much less marry. Makes me sick. Link to post Share on other sites
Kizza Posted December 29, 2013 Share Posted December 29, 2013 I guess wondering why will only do your head in. I would come to a conclusion that as you ended it he felt rejected and didn't like that. I was with someone and when I ended it he called me pining and whining and so I continued the relationship. He was never emotionally invested in me at any point but acted like he couldn't be without me when I ended it. Suffice to say once he got back the control he ended it with me a couple months later and I haven't heard from him since. Maybe he can't be alone and has dived head first in to who ever will have him? My cousin does that, she hasn't been single for 5 minutes since she was 14. Been married 2 times and divorced 2 times. Anyway like I said, there could be a whole bunch of answers or reasons. The only absolution is wondering why will just give you a pointless headache... Link to post Share on other sites
StalwartMind Posted December 29, 2013 Share Posted December 29, 2013 The Bad News: You are hurt and left searching for answers that you probably, like many others, will never find. The Good News: You've just been put on a boat in the vast ocean of amazing and wonderful men that are out there. You are the captain so you set the pace. At the moment you are sailing through a pretty hazardous area with a lot of icebergs that have question mark signs placed in the ground. You feel despair by this overwhelming new environment, but in the distance you see a silly man waving at you. Naturally your curiosity got the best of you and you try steer towards him, you realize that it's me, and standing next to me is Kizza. We give you some supplies and tell you, to ignore the ice bergs. Soon you will be in new and better waters, and while it may seem impossible at the moment, the icebergs will be slowly fade away in the horizon behind you. There really is no way we can ever really truly know, why people do, think, act, say the things they do. Regardless of what good you've had, and hope unimaginable it is at this very moment, out there awaits you something that will make you feel much better than the best you've experienced. It's up to you though to explore and discover, but for now it's perfectly alright if you just set the pace to slow and do your best to set your thoughts straight again. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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