liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Share Posted December 30, 2013 Long time ago, he told me this girl was bothering him, inboxing his (other) girlfriend, telling me she's crazy! Next thing I know, she's not crazy. OK. So I let it go. Now I see him on her Facebook (twice since 11/30) and her on his page today. I don't like it! So I asked him: what's up? First you said she's crazy, so what happened? He said this lady apologized to God so he forgave her. I asked him point blank: did you sleep with her? "No, babe." OK, but what was she inboxing, telling on him, what happened? This is all on text. "I'll call you later, babe." And he will. What do you guys think?? I'ma listen to him with a non-hostile, open mind since obviously we are not exclusive. But no lies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You guys will say he's a cheater, of course he lies. Opinions above and beyond that are welcome. Link to post Share on other sites
Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted December 30, 2013 Share Posted December 30, 2013 What was she inboxing his "other" gf? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 What was she inboxing his "other" gf? Exactly what I'm asking him. I'm waiting for him to call and explain this to me. Obviously she has some dirt on him! All this "she's crazy, inboxing" was just as he and I were starting up. I don't even think he & I had slept together yet at that point. Link to post Share on other sites
Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted December 30, 2013 Share Posted December 30, 2013 How do you know they were on each other's FB page? I'm confused and need more info. It's hard to make a determination off of what you've given except that he has 2 girlfriends, and you're one of them, and now there's a suspicious 3rd in the picture. Hard to say it's not surprising. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 How do you know they were on each other's FB page? Well it's weird. I was wondering about this girl, looked at my page and sure enough, there's a post on his wall from her. Like she just popped into my mind earlier out of the blue, couldn't even remember the girl's name until I saw this post on his wall today, so clearly my instincts are on point. So then looked at her wall, and there were two messages from him! I don't like it! now there's a suspicious 3rd in the picture. I don't really think it's all like that. Those days are kind of behind him, juggling too many women, back in the day and way before he met me but still! He's got some explaining to do. The problem is his need for external validation. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted December 30, 2013 Share Posted December 30, 2013 Long time ago, he told me this girl was bothering him, inboxing his (other) girlfriend, telling me she's crazy! Next thing I know, she's not crazy. OK. So I let it go. Now I see him on her Facebook (twice since 11/30) and her on his page today. I don't like it! So I asked him: what's up? First you said she's crazy, so what happened? He said this lady apologized to God so he forgave her. I asked him point blank: did you sleep with her? "No, babe." OK, but what was she inboxing, telling on him, what happened? This is all on text. "I'll call you later, babe." And he will. What do you guys think?? I'ma listen to him with a non-hostile, open mind since obviously we are not exclusive. But no lies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You guys will say he's a cheater, of course he lies. Opinions above and beyond that are welcome. Wait, what? How many girlfriends does this guy have? This story is confusing from the start... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 Wait, what? How many girlfriends does this guy have? This story is confusing from the start... He lives with one, but I've been seeing him for 19 months. I woke up angry this morning. He hasn't called to tell me the story on the dirt this girl has on him. He's probably waiting until he drops his ol' lady off at work this morning, plus he's had all night to rehearse his story. I am disgusted!!!!!!! Please, I am interested in comments that don't pertain to the fact that he's already a known cheater. Except for the fact that: what kind of person gets an inbox from someone, he obviously explained it away, then sees this kind of crap: Her Name posted to His Name 15 hours ago I love you His Name! )) You have helped me through my dark times and have shared some laughs along the way. You are a blessing in my life! )) Like · His Name likes this. Then she commented on her own post: Her Name Bless you and your family! ) 15 hours ago · Like · 1 Of course the likes are from him. I am repulsed by his lack of discriminating taste! He "loves" everyone. It was charming at first. At first! This is what he wrote: His Name posted to Her Name November 30 via mobile Love U Babe. Her Name likes this. Her Name I love you too His Name...always! December 2 at 8:52pm via mobile · 1 Now granted he says Love U Babe to everyone. But something about this girl...I don't like!!!!!!!!!!!! What did she inbox? What's the dirt? Also he wrote this: His Name posted to Her Name 15 hours ago via mobile I Love U Sweetiepie. Her Name likes this. Her Name Awww! I love you sooooo much!! ) His Name! 15 hours ago · 1 There's something wrong here. I am done!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Come on, give me some good comments. I'll probably be hearing from him within 2 hours. Link to post Share on other sites
InnocentMan Posted December 30, 2013 Share Posted December 30, 2013 This guy's good. He's having an affair on top of an affair? Is that the accusation here? He doesn't sound in that much trouble. He's bossing it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 I think I know what he is going to say. I think this person has been a fan since the 90s. Perhaps he confided in her about his escapades. But still obviously something ticked her off. Link to post Share on other sites
fixing Posted December 30, 2013 Share Posted December 30, 2013 Wow, i just noticed, he used the petname 'sweetiepie' in that last exchange instead of his usual 'Babe' Your definitely onto something here. Keep us informed! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
melodymatters Posted December 30, 2013 Share Posted December 30, 2013 liloldlady, how can I NOT talk about the fact that he's already cheating on his live in GF with you ? If he was YOUR BF we all would be trying to give you good advice, but it seems you are OK with being number 2, just don't want there to be a number 3 ? Could I please beg you to get some self respect, and DROP this guy all together and find someone who is into you and only you ? If cheating and open relationships are your thing you might be better off in the Other woman/Other man thread. We people who seek healthy one on one relationships aren't going to be much help to you. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 This guy's good. He's having an affair on top of an affair? Is that the accusation here? No, I believe him when he says he hasn't slept with her. He has no reason to lie to me about things of this nature because it's an open relationship. At this point, I don't even care. There's something very bad in the air... Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 Wow, i just noticed, he used the petname 'sweetiepie' in that last exchange instead of his usual 'Babe' THANK YOU!!!!!!! That is highly unusual language for him! Sweetie is common, Babe of course, but Sweetie Pie??? No, that's highly unusual!! Your definitely onto something here. Thank you for this validation! Keep us informed! Will do. He still hasn't called. I'm not even angry anymore. I'm accepting that I want someone different in my life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 liloldlady, how can I NOT talk about the fact that he's already cheating on his live in GF with you ? Because that's not the point. it seems you are OK with being number 2, just don't want there to be a number 3 ? I don't think that's what's happening. But he has emotional affairs. He talks on the phone a lot. You'd think he's a teenage girl. find someone who is into you and only you ? I do have someone like that, but he lives rather far away, but we're working on spending time together, so this is good. He's who I loved first anyway. Thanks for your thoughts. Link to post Share on other sites
devilish innocent Posted December 30, 2013 Share Posted December 30, 2013 I do have someone like that, but he lives rather far away, but we're working on spending time together, so this is good. He's who I loved first anyway. Thanks for your thoughts. So the guy you've been posting about isn't even your primary relationship? I don't see how it's fair of you to say he's not allowed to love another girl when you have another guy you love. Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 (edited) Update: he finally called, we talked strictly business, he had to jump to do an interview, said he'll call me right back. I didn't even bring up the girl. I did tell him that I need the man in my life to be focused and selective, not entertaining Sally, Jenny, Suzy, Jessica, Samantha... (Think he got the hint?) He's very depressed about money. I am not here to be petty and babysit him about all the "bottom feeders" (yes, I used that word; am I being passive aggressive?) he entertains. We've had these conversations before and I am not about to be perceived as a jealous, possessive woman. That is not the script in the screenplay of my life! Edited December 30, 2013 by liloldlady Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 So the guy you've been posting about isn't even your primary relationship? I don't see how it's fair of you to say he's not allowed to love another girl when you have another guy you love. I had to think about this before replying. I almost didn't reply, but I have some clarity. The person I'm posting about has been my primary relationship. In fact, he helped me through some very rough times (just like he did with that girl on his Facebook, although not exactly, LOL) when I have been estranged from my true love. I haven't seen my true love in 21 months. It's strange, I know. So I am being fair, but I don't want to keep having the same conversations with him. He needs to get his life together. He is a reflection of me, I've told him, by association (since we're kind of an open secret at this point). And all the love you babes, love you sweeties are tacky. I'm going to text him and say, oh! I forgot. So what did that girl exactly inbox your girlfriend about? Because I still want to know. He sounded depressed, like he knows he's in the dog house, LOL. That and how the holidays bring out his depression because of money. Poor dude. Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted December 30, 2013 Author Share Posted December 30, 2013 (edited) Update: classic he said/she said. She said they did, he said they've never even been alone. He does attract a lot of lunatics in his industry (present company excepted, LOL). I'm going to leave it alone and not nag. We have other prioritie$. But I'm watching her!! Also, I guess that girl threatened to inbox but never did. He was also a little defensive, but patiently entertained all my questions. He also did a little conversation diversion and made it about me and him and our past, brought up my true love twice as well. Edited December 30, 2013 by liloldlady Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted December 31, 2013 Share Posted December 31, 2013 ....Is this real life? I just can't with this thread anymore. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Keke1 Posted January 1, 2014 Share Posted January 1, 2014 Lol at the whole thread 2 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 1, 2014 Share Posted January 1, 2014 Exactly what I'm asking him. I'm waiting for him to call and explain this to me. Obviously she has some dirt on him! All this "she's crazy, inboxing" was just as he and I were starting up. I don't even think he & I had slept together yet at that point. Players say that about all their ex's. Imagine what he's said behind your back. Why are you with him? He sounds like a real jerk and narcissistic/user. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Snipercatt Posted January 1, 2014 Share Posted January 1, 2014 You had posted that you and your ex were getting together over the holidays. Did that happen? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted January 1, 2014 Share Posted January 1, 2014 Update: classic he said/she said. She said they did, he said they've never even been alone. He does attract a lot of lunatics in his industry (present company excepted, LOL). I'm going to leave it alone and not nag. We have other prioritie$. But I'm watching her!! Also, I guess that girl threatened to inbox but never did. He was also a little defensive, but patiently entertained all my questions. He also did a little conversation diversion and made it about me and him and our past, brought up my true love twice as well. Is it normal or healthy for you to have not seen your love in 21 months and he has a live-in girlfriend but you are jealous of him "inboxing/facebooking" someone else? Like it doesn't seem like he has anywhere near the level of investment or commitment in you that you do in him. It doesn't seem like he has that for ANYONE. Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted January 1, 2014 Author Share Posted January 1, 2014 Players say that about all their ex's. She's not an ex, she's a fan. Link to post Share on other sites
Author liloldlady Posted January 1, 2014 Author Share Posted January 1, 2014 You had posted that you and your ex were getting together over the holidays. Did that happen? I contemplated venturing to his neighborhood for New Year's, but chose not to. However on Christmas Eve Eve, he suggested what I'd been thinking: that I take a train to his town on the weekends. NOT to stay at his place like we used to do (doing things differently this time); I'll get my own cottage. However, it was so much better for HIM to suggest it, rather than I invite myself. Link to post Share on other sites
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