brokenhearted529 Posted January 5, 2014 Share Posted January 5, 2014 this guy and I have been together for a year and nine months. we got engaged on Valentine's 2013. We've had nothing but great times, very few arguments. August of 2012, I suffered a miscarriage which had to result in a stillbirth. Hardest thing either one of us had to do. we both have a child. he has a daughter and so do I. that would've been our first child together, not to mention a BOY! yea sad I know. so in October 2013 I found out I was pregnant again and was so happy. we were prepared for this baby but unfortunately that ended in tragedy also just a week before Christmas. ON Dec 9th 2012 events took place that changed our lives forever. The chain of events caused him to have to leave town for a bit (life or death), making our relationship long distance. we had come to the conclusion that instead of him moving back, my daughter and I would move there and we would be a family again. with the distance, the stress of events that took place, and me losing the 2nd baby, he says he needs time to cope with the stress of things. every other day we were arguing over little things. I expressed my feelings the best way I knew how and he still says he loves and misses me and he cant wait to get back in my arms and he never wants to be away from me again. he came back this weekend and said that he was staying for good. after the sex, we also have a convo about the arguments we had and also concerns and thoughts that I had on my mind while he was away. turns out he has a "friend" now that he texts from time to time (friend of his sisters) that he met while he was away. he says she's only a friend and nothing happened with them and he loves me so much and we're gonna be together just not right now bc he gotta get himself together. he says she knows about me and him and his conversations with her area going no further than a friendship. I've never had a problem with him being dishonest or talking to any other females for as long as we were together. he's always been man enough to tell me the truth, so I have no reason not to believe him when he says they're friends. it bothers me only bc he showed me a pic of her and she's actually pretty and thick. i'm only 5'2" and weigh about 96 pounds. never been a thick chick and i know im not the prettiest in the world. i'm insecure about my weight bc when im out with others everyone thinks im their child or think that my daughter is my lil sister. I want to desperately gain weight and have been for so many years. so i'm looking at this chick like cute face and this chick got ass for days and she's younger than i am wats wrong with me. we talk and he says he loves me and we are definitely going to be together but he jut needs space right now. He's saying we're single but I don't wanna be. my heart is with him and only him. Now he says he's considering going back. He says nothing is gonna change and we are still gonna be together after he clears his head. but I feel like im fighting his sisters in a never ending war. They want him there but I want him here and I;m about to lose my mind bc I love him so much and iknow its gonna take time for him to get on his feet there so that I can come and i'm afraid that in the process this chick may slide right on in and he forgets about me and moves on. i'm really trying to fight for us but its like his sisters are fighting just as hard as I am for him to come there. My heart and mind are at war. I don't want him to go but im tired of feeling like I lost him already idk wat to do. How do I make him see how much it means to me for him to go away like that? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 5, 2014 Share Posted January 5, 2014 I am so very sorry for the deaths of your children. Have you gotten counseling for that grief? It must be overwhelming & may be coloring your perspective on everything. If you have always trusted your guy in the past, this other girl no matter what she looks like, shouldn't be a problem but the next time you are there, ask to meet her. Keep the lines of communication open with your guy & work together to overcome the distance in your relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
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