MissBee Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 How do overweight and obese people date? The same way everyone else does. Other than if one is bed bound and can't go out (even then there was a documentary on a guy like this who had a wife) then obese and overweight people date like everyone else. The idea that only skinny, fit, gorgeous, rich or other people in similar kinds of privileged categories are the only ones dating or don't have dating issues isn't true. The world is filled with all kinds of people who are not fit, not models, not wealthy and people are dating and having babies and will continue to do so. Obese and overweight people, believe it or not, are not automatically unattractive and there are many people who in fact don't mind or even prefer that look. Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 I think it's not just the weight, but the grooming... I know of "big" women who smell and dress fantastic. I mean, ever see that store "Torrid"? When you see those women go by, the guys just stare. Then, there's other "big" women who look like they smell like fried chicken. Bleh, Link to post Share on other sites
whatcanitellyou Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 Every single guy friend I have also happens to be overweight and pretty much dateless. They try to date, but it rarely works for them. Probably because they're trying to date models, under the mistaken assumption that women aren't visual and as long as they're funny they're entitled to 10's. Link to post Share on other sites
Mangina Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 (edited) Probably because they're trying to date models, under the mistaken assumption that women aren't visual and as long as they're funny they're entitled to 10's. i think it is girls who back that up and say it is true when it is not. not even big girls like big guys. Edited November 15, 2014 by Mangina Link to post Share on other sites
whatcanitellyou Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 not even big girls like big guys. Maybe so, but most big ladies have had society make clear them that they can't expect a fit guy. Men, otoh, are told that no matter how they look they can get fit women. Link to post Share on other sites
Mangina Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 Maybe so, but most big ladies have had society make clear them that they can't expect a fit guy. Men, otoh, are told that no matter how they look they can get fit women. well it does not stop them from trying to get thin guys. i am a very thin guy and every girl who ever liked me was big and i do not mean just a little bit. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayken Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 well it does not stop them from trying to get thin guys. i am a very thin guy and every girl who ever liked me was big and i do not mean just a little bit. Everybody else needs somebody to love 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TigerLilly78 Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 i think it is girls who back that up and say it is true when it is not. not even big girls like big guys. What a load of horse crap I like big guys I prefer the teddy bear type guy.. Link to post Share on other sites
Mangina Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 What a load of horse crap I like big guys I prefer the teddy bear type guy.. okay good for you Link to post Share on other sites
TigerLilly78 Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 okay good for you Yep def is the sad thing is I always found most don't want to date big women ironic but true.. Link to post Share on other sites
whatcanitellyou Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 Yep def is the sad thing is I always found most don't want to date big women ironic but true.. I think this supports my point. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ascendotum Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 Probably because they're trying to date models, under the mistaken assumption that women aren't visual and as long as they're funny they're entitled to 10's. I very much doubt they are holding out for models. lol My fat friends certainly didn't, but I would not be surprised if they want a woman who is not over weight though or maybe even slim. I wonder if that is case. The trouble is they can realistically say they are not holding out for a hot girl but in reality want women who are fairly popular (relationships or nsa). Weight skews the dating market. If my chubby/fat friends went for women with same body type they would have had lot more options. Some did some didn't. Link to post Share on other sites
whatcanitellyou Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 I very much doubt they are holding out for models. lol My fat friends certainly didn't, but I would not be surprised if they want a woman who is not over weight though or maybe even slim. I wonder if that is case. The trouble is they can realistically say they are not holding out for a hot girl but in reality want women who are fairly popular (relationships or nsa). Weight skews the dating market. If my chubby/fat friends went for women with same body type they would have had lot more options. Some did some didn't. Ok, that could be true. But they are holding out for something they can't provide.....they want a woman that's not overweight while they are overweight. Can't demand what you can't provide, especially if you can't seem to find what you're demanding. They're not attracted to heavy so why should a normal weight/slim woman be attracted to a heavy guy? If you want a fit body get your booty to the gym and work on providing a fit body. Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 (edited) i think it is girls who back that up and say it is true when it is not. not even big girls like big guys. I think it's ugly dudes that started that rumor and then also included stuff like shallow and superficial to shame people into thinking they should be attracted to something they are not. I would never date an overweight girl not because she lives an unhealthy life and appearantly doesn't take care of her health.......I just don't like the way overweight women look. As far as in relation to me having sex with them. Not even a blowjob in the dark. It's a purely aesthetic thing. Ok, I am concerned that she takes care of herself and will live a long and capable life, so 90% aesthetic and 10% health reasons. Edited November 16, 2014 by Imported 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mangina Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 I think it's ugly dudes that started that rumor and then also included stuff like shallow and superficial to shame people into thinking they should be attracted to something they are not. . I though it was ugly dudettes who say that. Link to post Share on other sites
Imported Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 I though it was ugly dudettes who say that. I think ugly in general. But I think ugly dudes started it, mainly to shame all the hotchicks into dating them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mangina Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 I think ugly in general. But I think ugly dudes started it, mainly to shame all the hotchicks into dating them. Yeah probably. Im dying to get out of the house and there is a freaking blizzard outside. Link to post Share on other sites
Darren2013 Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 Well obesity is an epidemic in America and more Americans are either overweight or obese than regular weight. Given these realities we know most of the American population is not single. So it isn't that hard. I am overweight myself by about 7-8 pounds. I have dated women in the past who were overweight. Not really a big issue for me. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 (edited) I guess you don't see how them dropping pounds can help them get dates then? Hmmm....denial is not just a river in Egypt I'm sorry, was this thread made by a big woman asking how to get dates or did someone ask how overweight people (the last I checked women weren't the only ones who were people) get dates? You didn't answer the question but immediately targeted women and started trying to tell big women how to lose weight when no one asked that. I hope you see the difference. I'm not sure what denial really has to do with it, since the thread wasn't a person saying they are a big woman and asking how they can get dates and then ignoring your advice when you suggested they lose weight lol. Plus as others have pointed out, if you look around it seems lots of overweight people have relationships, so clearly somehow they are dating and it's not illogical to assume they date like the rest of folks. Some people prefer bigger folks or don't care either way as long as they're attracted to them so the dating process is more or less the same. Yes of course many people may not be attracted to them, but that goes for any other person too, where not being big doesn't equal attractive either or people knocking your door down for dates, so the dating process is the same like everyone else. You meet someone in person or online, they fancy you, you them, and thus you begin to date. Edited November 16, 2014 by MissBee 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Lernaean_Hydra Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 I guess you don't see how them dropping pounds can help them get dates then? Hmmm....denial is not just a river in Egypt Uh, I'm a woman who lost a metric f*ton of weight and hell yeah I've gotten more dates but I'm stiiiiilllll not seeing how any of this is relevant to the topic at hand.... *edit* should've read page 2 before posting this as Miss Bee laid things out nicely. Link to post Share on other sites
ascendotum Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 Uh, I'm a woman who lost a metric f*ton of weight and hell yeah I've gotten more dates but I'm stiiiiilllll not seeing how any of this is relevant to the topic at hand.... . Were guys hitting on you much before? Offers for fun but also relationship? (I guess it depends what you call a ton...a lot of variation I find in what women say is a lot or not in weight...the overweight underplay how much they are over and the slimmer women overplay how much they put on/lose or think they are over by) Were the types of guys who were showing interest in you desirable from your perspective? Did they tend to be overweight themselves? Do you have different attitude towards guys now? I have tended to find women who were overweight when younger (esp growing up) and subsequently lost weight to be really nice to everyone not just the attractive people and are DTE and don't have attitude because how they grew up with lower self esteem and also maybe having to focus more on personality. One of the most beautiful girls I went out for a while was a former fat girl. Not sure if I can say this applies to guys as I don't take interest in them the same way. I know a couple of former skinny guys though who got big and were cynical with their change in fortune. One was strictly PnD on the now eager thin women, and then actually preferred bigger/curvy women. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 !. aliens love us.... 2. i cook and fatten up my dates......then i eat them 3. i put spells on guys and they see the inner me.....which is pretty hot 4.why did i answer this thread....... to just say i guess.....we as overweight and or obese peoples date like dem der' normal type people.......cheers with a pound and a half of good quality 60 per cent cocoa solids ganache covered chocolate cake ...best wishes...deb 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 i think it is girls who back that up and say it is true when it is not. not even big girls like big guys. Just look around you, you will see many fat guys and girls with partners and not necessarily fat ones! Unless you are in Paris of course! Link to post Share on other sites
Lernaean_Hydra Posted November 16, 2014 Share Posted November 16, 2014 (edited) Were guys hitting on you much before? Offers for fun but also relationship? Yes, some, but I certainly wouldn't say "much" and they weren't typically looking for anything but a fling at best, at worst they were looking for a relationship but one that would be "secret". Back when I was in high school there were a couple guys who were into me but again, they "didn't want people to know". (I guess it depends what you call a ton...a lot of variation I find in what women say is a lot or not in weight...the overweight underplay how much they are over and the slimmer women overplay how much they put on/lose or think they are over by) Well, I lost about 120lbs soo...... Were the types of guys who were showing interest in you desirable from your perspective? A few of them one of them I was really hot for but he was a cute guy in general and of course had others interested in him. When another, much thinner girl showed strong interest in him - even though the guy had made it clear he had a "thing" for bigger women - I still I just didn't have the confidence or the heart to compete. As far as were the guys attractive or desirable? The ones who only wanted sex? Yes, mostly but the guys looking for LTRs, not so much. Did they tend to be overweight themselves? Most of them were on the average - skinny side. I'd say out of maybe 10 guys who showed any kind of interest in me overall, 3 of them were overweight. Do you have different attitude towards guys now? I'm not sure how to answer this actually. I mean, sure yeah I guess I do I have tended to find women who were overweight when younger (esp growing up) and subsequently lost weight to be really nice to everyone not just the attractive people and are DTE and don't have attitude because how they grew up with lower self esteem and also maybe having to focus more on personality. One of the most beautiful girls I went out for a while was a former fat girl. Not sure if I can say this applies to guys as I don't take interest in them the same way. I know a couple of former skinny guys though who got big and were cynical with their change in fortune. One was strictly PnD on the now eager thin women, and then actually preferred bigger/curvy women. Responses in bold. Also, in general yes, I am pretty nice to everyone and friendly but I am also quick to react to rudeness or a "slight" because I battled being teased growing up for over a decade and into adulthood and I hate being bullied. I'd say personality and espeically relationship wise I'm very low maintenance and down to earth for the most part and am very egalitarian in my tastes. Edited November 16, 2014 by Lernaean_Hydra 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted November 17, 2014 Share Posted November 17, 2014 How do overweight and obese people date? I know some larger people who date very well... I know one woman who is very obese (UK size 30, 4ft 11 tall - ask Emilia she will tell you thats massive). She is currently using 3 different men for sex and having a ball. I know another chap who is currently very upset because his heart has been broken by a larger lady... Its personal preference. I have both been very fat (not as bad as above but I was porky) and very thin... Always had better luck when fatter... just saying... and no they were not all fat chaps. Most were very fit, good looking etc and preferred a bit of something soft to curl up next to... oh and boobs... they love the boobs... Link to post Share on other sites
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