polynomial Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I realise it would probably set back my healing process but i cant stop waiting for a breadcrumb from my ex. realistically i know our relationship would never work again as it has proved to fail time after time but i still long to know that he misses me.. maybe he does though but knows that sending breadcrumbs wouldnt help the situation.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RDawg Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I wonder what his reaction would be if you asked for one? 'Dear xxx, please could I have a breadcrumb?' Would probably think you're off your rocker. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author polynomial Posted January 7, 2014 Author Share Posted January 7, 2014 I wonder what his reaction would be if you asked for one? 'Dear xxx, please could I have a breadcrumb?' Would probably think you're off your rocker. even funnier when i think of it in my native language lol Link to post Share on other sites
margot13 Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I realise it would probably set back my healing process but i cant stop waiting for a breadcrumb from my ex. realistically i know our relationship would never work again as it has proved to fail time after time but i still long to know that he misses me.. maybe he does though but knows that sending breadcrumbs wouldnt help the situation.. I have the same problem :-) Some days I would kill for a bread crumb... Stupid I know as it wouldn't solve anything. But hey, I'm human!!! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I would like one to 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Kalinka1 Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I'm getting the but meh - what's the point? I think it is better to not get them at all than just boring and pointless chit-chat... it hurts to see your ex being completely fine and indifferent. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Bigcitydreamer Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I think everyone wants a breadcrumb until they get one. The reason they suck so much is because for a split second hope is reignited and when the breadcrumb turns into nothing more than an ego boost for the other, it's like you have to start back at square one again and grieve the loss of that glimmer of hope. 8 Link to post Share on other sites
julzfromsa Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I think everyone wants a breadcrumb until they get one. The reason they suck so much is because for a split second hope is reignited and when the breadcrumb turns into nothing more than an ego boost for the other, it's like you have to start back at square one again and grieve the loss of that glimmer of hope. So true - they feel great for a moment, but they suck so much in a day or 2. Breadcrumbs, or even any form of communication 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author polynomial Posted January 7, 2014 Author Share Posted January 7, 2014 I think everyone wants a breadcrumb until they get one. The reason they suck so much is because for a split second hope is reignited and when the breadcrumb turns into nothing more than an ego boost for the other, it's like you have to start back at square one again and grieve the loss of that glimmer of hope. Yeah. Deep down, I know. Well, not even deep down. Based on my experience, I know. My ex started to talk some random gibberish a week after BU and it was awful. Now it's been 1.5 months since BU and I wish he'd start again eventhough I KNOW it sets me back. Link to post Share on other sites
CelticGibson Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 Breadcrums have a habit of sticking in your throat when you least expect them. I would not wish to have anything of the sort. I want the full loaf or nothing at all. I deserve the full loaf, not some pithy utterance that probably took all of 20 seconds to write and forget about. Anyone that wishes for the crumbs off the table devalues their worth. You are worth the full loaf, never forget that... 9 Link to post Share on other sites
LadyM Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I also want a breadcrumb. But when I think deeper into it, the only thing I really want is the hope that the breadcrumb is him wanting me back. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
mtnbiker3000 Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I think this a strong desire during the first stage of recovery. After a couple of months of NC, this desire dissipates. I've never got one and glad for it. Approaching 1 year post BU and NC. Now, it would just royally piss me off 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AnyaNova Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I also want a breadcrumb. But when I think deeper into it, the only thing I really want is the hope that the breadcrumb is him wanting me back. I know what you mean. Though given it has been four months, I have absolutely no hope of breadcrumbage. But I completely understand the mentality of wanting one. It almost feels like I don't even matter to him enough for him to want an ego boost from me. Which is a very bizarre contrast from our last night together. I am pretty much over him now, but occasionally, I still wonder and wonder why I haven't gotten one. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
LadyM Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 This is really nutty thinking.... I got a psychic reading last week and he told me I wouldn't hear from my ex until August and I thought.....wow, how will I last that long?! Completely crazy and warped thinking! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
julzfromsa Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 This is really nutty thinking.... I got a psychic reading last week and he told me I wouldn't hear from my ex until August and I thought.....wow, how will I last that long?! Completely crazy and warped thinking! by August you will have found an amaze-balls partner, be absolutely happy and when the crummage comes, it will be the breadcrumbs on a restaurant table that requires housekeeping 3 Link to post Share on other sites
mantlefan Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 I think everyone wants a breadcrumb until they get one. The reason they suck so much is because for a split second hope is reignited and when the breadcrumb turns into nothing more than an ego boost for the other, it's like you have to start back at square one again and grieve the loss of that glimmer of hope. Thank you. I hope I can remember this. Especially when I will probably see my ex at a business meeting in a couple weeks. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
LadyM Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 by August you will have found an amaze-balls partner, be absolutely happy and when the crummage comes, it will be the breadcrumbs on a restaurant table that requires housekeeping Haha! Love that! And I so hope it comes true... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 Breadcrumbs only make you hungry for the meal you are never going to get! 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Softie Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 Do you think we want a breadcrumb so that we can take back control? i.e. That we can say no thanks to them and then be on the control side rather than the dumper side which tends to be more loss of control and therefore scarier?.. Worth a thought. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Softie Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 This is really nutty thinking.... I got a psychic reading last week and he told me I wouldn't hear from my ex until August and I thought.....wow, how will I last that long?! Completely crazy and warped thinking! Haha I got a reading weeks ago, she said that I would meet someone early Jan with letter J whose 5ft 10, dark hair and that my ex will also be in contact in early Jan too saying his changed. We'll see and I'll keep you all posted. Just so you know I WILL not be contacting my ex, over 5 weeks of NC. He got all the second chances a couple of months ago. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
flightplan Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 Do you think we want a breadcrumb so that we can take back control? i.e. That we can say no thanks to them and then be on the control side rather than the dumper side which tends to be more loss of control and therefore scarier?.. Worth a thought. Naw, my silence is control enough for me. I really don't give a shyte how it effects her. If your under the illusion you don't have control, then you're holding yourself back. No one has control over anybody else... we're free to feel and dictate responses of our choosing. I chose to argue with her over the breakup. Looking back on it, I wish I would've just hung the damn phone up. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author polynomial Posted January 7, 2014 Author Share Posted January 7, 2014 Do you think we want a breadcrumb so that we can take back control? i.e. That we can say no thanks to them and then be on the control side rather than the dumper side which tends to be more loss of control and therefore scarier?.. Worth a thought. I *do* think that's why I'm hoping for mine. So that I could a) ignore it b) reply with something like oh I'm busy etc. Because I realise even if he begged me back (never gonna happen lol), we would never work out. So I guess it is about gaining control.. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
LadyM Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 Haha I got a reading weeks ago, she said that I would meet someone early Jan with letter J whose 5ft 10, dark hair and that my ex will also be in contact in early Jan too saying his changed. We'll see and I'll keep you all posted. Just so you know I WILL not be contacting my ex, over 5 weeks of NC. He got all the second chances a couple of months ago. Do let us know what happens! Link to post Share on other sites
mtnbiker3000 Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 http://www.webstaurantstore.com/images/products/extra_large/54733/95472.jpg 3 Link to post Share on other sites
LadyM Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 http://www.webstaurantstore.com/images/products/extra_large/54733/95472.jpg So funny!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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