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Random Thoughts And A Big Hello


MissingHerBad

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MissingHerBad

Whats up everyone. Where going on 4 months now, I still think about her everyday. Its alot easier to deal with especially after all the councilling, phsychiatrists and medication but none the less the pain still exists somewhere. It is to the point where me and the ex can email each other. Lately it feels like she has been wanting to more details about my life. Just the otherday she wrote me and for the first time since all of this happened she wrote, I still remember and still feel. I havent put any of this to heart because its a bad road to take I figure. Shes got this new bf and hes rich....now they can be rich together and he can become a part of her perfect little family with his fancy car. Could it be that this girl is one of those girls that just wants to be spoiled. Sometimes in her email she talks about him, I told her I dont care to hear his name so now she refers to him as "the guy whos name I cant mention". Is some of this simply a ploy to make me jealous. Should I even be letting this bother me right now?...Im jepordizing my well being here yet for some insane reason I still love this girl......................................................................People reading this who are in alot of pain getting over someone, I feel for you but you best beggin dealing with it because its a long road even 4 months later! By the way I just want to say hi to everyone, Im here, Im alive and Im trying to live if anyone was wondering :p

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I've cut off all contact with my ex and its not because I want to get her back now. I've accepted that someone who could make me feel as bad as I did after the split surely doesn't deserve any of my attention. My friend Susan managed to convince me that I'm too good for her which helps and I've even joined a few dating websites and started my own blog which I randomly vent to who ever will listen.

 

I seriously recommend that you just stop talking to her, details about her new man will just make you feel bad. If she's happy then if you do still love her then you should be glad and just move on. No contact and looking for a new female friend is the best way to go, you dont need to be looking for a serious relationship but just someone to have fun with and go out on dates with. A few of these and your self esteem will be great.

 

If you search my posts, I was seeing a girl called Heather and everything was great while seeing her but now that it ended and my ex led me on for a bit so i'm back at square 1 again and searching for another female to distract me.

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Hey,

 

Maybe she is trying to make you jeolous, it's certainly wierd to tell you all about him. If you've said you son't want to know anyhthing about him she must know it's because you're not ok with it so she shouldn't mention him at all. I don't know, very tricky....

 

xxxxxxxxxxx

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MissingHerBad

Its not like Im really reading into. Its just annoying thats all. I could probably never go back to her anyways....In a way she is a bitch. Even though I love her I cant really say Im happy for her because of what she did. GGGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRR

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So she did something bad, Shes a bit of a bitch, you could probably never go back and she makes you say GGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRR!?!?!?!?!?!?

 

Why are you bothering to have contact at all? Sounds like you know you're well out of it.

 

Be strong and leave her to her life while you have yours.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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Yep, block her email address its the only way to move on. Yes you may love her but the feeling will fade over time, especially when you don't have any contact with her. I still have romantic feelings for my ex but since i've not seen her or talked to her in 2 weeks those feelings have started to dampen down. Though I know the little bit of contact from her will ignite the feelings and i'll be madly in love with her again. I know its not healthy thats why I'm trying to avoid her.

 

The curiosity of her emails will always make you feel down and you'll start the whole "What If" where you start reading too much into emails. You've already said that she's a bitch and you wouldn't get back with her. So whats the point? Do you really see a friendship with her, especially if she is with this other guy?

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xxsilverdragonxx

I too am reaching my 4 month mark. Not much has changed. My ex hasn't tried to contact me, except for when she called to let me know she was home from the hospital, just giving me an update because I went and saw her there, and the last time I saw her was a week and a half ago when she got home from the hospital(car wreck, other post) where I went to talk to her dad. I guess I'm doing ok, but I'm not sure if talking to her at all on the phone or email or in person is going to make me feel any better. It might temporarily ease the pain, but as soon as I hang up or leave it will begin to build again.

 

I really don't understand why our ex-relationship is affecting me. Maybe it's because we did so much new stuff together; stuff I had never experienced before, like going new places and such. Maybe those memories will forever be good in my mind, but my heart won't accept the way things have changed. I dunno. Its still a mystery as to why it STILL has such a powerful hold on me. I mean, i'm not necessarily dying to talk to her. I can't even imagine us together in the future anymore. But something inside still craves what I lost, which I have to beat myself into thinking what I lost wasn't what I needed anyways. Hope that makes sense.

 

Missingherbad - If the emails aren't making you feel better, and you are sure you aren't tricking yourself into thinking something that may or may not be (I know, my brain has a habit of this), then I agree that for you, you should cut off the contact. She may be clinging onto the past too, or maybe she gets lonely and knows that you will always be around for her for whatever she needs. But I don't think she is emailing you to help you, but only to help her. Otherwise, it seems to me she would be asking more personal deep questions, with a sense of gaining your introspect on them.

 

I mean, No contact is pain in itself. It's enough to rip us mentally to shreds. But you must ask yourself where you are better at.....staying in touch with her through email with no real benefits in sight, or beginning a new chapter in your life. After my reflection I chose myself to try to move on. Notice I said try. But I do realize I'm in less pain when I don't want to see or talk to her, than constantly thinking of all the what-ifs and what-can-I-do's.

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