Confusion_Reigns Posted January 8, 2014 Share Posted January 8, 2014 Hi, I'm deeply deeply confused and need some real help. I don't know how to find that help. I'm googeling but don't know how to chose form the choices I'm shown... Me, I need help, I need someone to really talk to really-really...with no ulterior motives, someone who knows nothing about me or my situation, who doesnt' know my husband or any of my people. I live in a very small town with many small neighboring towns fairly close by...say within an hours drive...not many to choose from and I'm concerned about choosing the wrong professional... I need this for me not for my husband, not my kids, not my friend, just for me....it's high time to start digging in... thank you so much for any and all advice Link to post Share on other sites
RightThere Posted January 8, 2014 Share Posted January 8, 2014 If you're working, check with your HR as they may even have some 1-800 numbers you could call first. Otherwise if you can't get a referral from anyone you know as to someone they had success with, it will be a total shot in the dark. The thing with counselling is it's about finding someone you are comfortable with. Many people get referred to a great counselor, but find it's not a good fit for them. Best advice I can give is just pick one with the best name or website and try it out. See if they specialize in individual counselling. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusion_Reigns Posted January 8, 2014 Author Share Posted January 8, 2014 Thank you... So basically just pick, huh? I can ask around to some of my friends and see if they can recommend anyone. Is there a way to research the person's professional back ground as related to their counseling abilities? It seems everyone wants something from me...they want me to do what they want me to do...and I'm tired...just tired of ALL of them...I just want to know that who ever I speak to will not have a predetermined "plan" for me, you know? Link to post Share on other sites
ChloelankshearMFTi Posted January 8, 2014 Share Posted January 8, 2014 I would suggest looking at online therapist directories such as Psychology Today, Good Therapy or Therapist Locator. Each therapist has a profile and a photo so you can see if you like the look and sound of them and you think they might be a good match for you. Many of the therapist directories verify therapists' credentials, checking they are licensed to practice. I agree with the previous poster, even if someone else recommends a therapist, it doesn't necessarily mean they will be a good match for you. You might like to prepare some questions for when you call them. Their manner and what they say may help you to make a decision. You might even want to speak to several therapists before deciding which one to choose. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusion_Reigns Posted January 8, 2014 Author Share Posted January 8, 2014 Thanks What kind of questions do I ask? Can you give me a couple of examples? Link to post Share on other sites
RightThere Posted January 8, 2014 Share Posted January 8, 2014 Thanks What kind of questions do I ask? Can you give me a couple of examples? Specifically what is their area of expertise (individual, couples, children). You can also ask them if they subscribe to any certain method of therapy (too many to list but would allow you to Google them up to see if they're right for you). Other than that, it's like online dating. You won't really know until you meet them and spend a couple sessions with them. Link to post Share on other sites
imtooconfused Posted January 8, 2014 Share Posted January 8, 2014 If you have private insurance, look through your preferred provider directory. Even if you don't have mental health coverage, doctors who accept insurance are more likely to have a reputable practice. Other than that, it's like online dating. And just like OLD, it may take a few visits to realize that the relationship is not working out. I went through a few counselors until I got a referral from a friend-of-a-friend and this counselor was spectacular. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ChloelankshearMFTi Posted January 8, 2014 Share Posted January 8, 2014 Questions might include whether they are experienced in working with clients going through similar issues, how long they have been in practice, what their theoretical approach is (you want to be sure they sound like they know what they're doing even if you don't understand what they are talking about!) and about their fees - what they charge, do they accept insurance etc. I disagree that they are more likely to be reputable if they accept insurance. Many successful therapists do not accept insurance as the payments are low, there is a lot of bureaucracy involved and it requires giving a diagnosis. If therapists have a thriving practice in my experience they are less likely to accept insurance as they don't need to. I say, trust your instinct. If you get a bad vibe or you feel like you wouldn't want to open up to a therapist then don't see them. Link to post Share on other sites
Shocked Suzie Posted January 9, 2014 Share Posted January 9, 2014 I got mine through my Doctor, not sure where you are but in the AU we can apply for 6 free sessions through a mental health plan. Also it may take a few attempts to find the right one, so if you feel like your not jelling them then try another. Also grieving or depression websites have handy info and support too It will get better, look after yourself... Eat well and try to get into fitness that you enjoy, it helps heaps!! SS x Link to post Share on other sites
Shocked Suzie Posted January 9, 2014 Share Posted January 9, 2014 Thanks What kind of questions do I ask? Can you give me a couple of examples? You will find you will probably just off load and you won't stop talking... When you walk out you may experience different emotions, my first few I felt drained... Later I felt I'd offloaded, lighter and usually found the answers myself just by her questions and chatting. Remember keep your expectations low and keep going as everyone gets different results and different times through out the therapy stages Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 9, 2014 Share Posted January 9, 2014 OP, as serious as this sounds, and respecting your wish to keep it private, I'll second the suggestion to get a referral through your PCP (doctor), and as part of a comprehensive physical, to rule out any physical issues relevant to your apparent strong desire for mental/emotional counseling. A doctor is generally constrained by HIPAA from discussing your case with anyone, even your spouse. Such a referral if, upon interview, does not seem like a good fit, can offer a referral to a number of colleagues, both locally or known to them in the larger area. Additionally, if combinative treatment is proscribed, then your doctor and therapist can work in concert to assist you. We actually found our psychologist through a prison psych my exW knew. He was great. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusion_Reigns Posted January 10, 2014 Author Share Posted January 10, 2014 Thank you everyone! I found someone that I feel might be a good match for me She's located fairly close by (about 45 min drive) and seems to have the same types of values, etc. I used the Therapist Locator website. I'll give her a call this afternoon to start the ball rolling... I am so happy, relieved, scared, but I know I need to do this... ]Thanks again! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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