Need some advice with a Girl I hardly know in one of my classes

[Creeper]

Im 17 years old and a Freshman in Community College, and at the beginning of the quarter I noticed this absoulutely beautiful girl in one of my classes. We have flirted a little bit when the prof is talking, and she always gives me a smile, but we havent really talked past anything other than our names and small talk.

 

Some background on me:

Im a big guy, 6 '5 238 lbs, and people think of me as a very nice person althiugh sometimes a little too quiet. I'm always more outgoing when I have friends with me in a class, it seems like I lose all my confidence once my friends are taken out of the equation. The only reason I had the guts to talk to her on the second day of class was because my guitar jamming friend Pat urged me to do it. It was really cool how we just kinda clicked, I don't think I've ever been interested in a girl right off the bat like this ever in my life.

 

But my problem is, my friend Pat recently dropped the class. And like I said I just totally lose my confidence once my support system is taken out from under me. I guess you could say I'm insecure or whatever. And just yesterday I happened to pull into a parking spot right next to her, the dumb luck just kinda floored me, and when she tried to make conversation I probably wasn't coherent at all. I feel as if everytime I see her lately its as if someone smacks me over the head lowering my IQ to below room temperature.

 

Ive never actually tried to pursue a girl before. In HS it was always the other way around. I had 2 gf's and they both asked me out, even though I was more interested in other pursuits, so those fell through. I think I'm at the point where If I don't do something soon I can forget my chances. Shes not desperate enough to come after me, and I can't just ride on good looks because that really only helps for meeting women, and nothing else contrary to popular belief.

 

I guess what I need is just some tips or something on starting a conversation or even asking her out. (taking a huge daring step) I feel as if I have to learn to become more independent, instead of only really being me when I am with my friends. I just have a huge fear that I'll make a retard out of myself, or find out that shes just a tease. Its almost like I WANT to do something, and Dont want to do something at the same time. BAH I'm more confused now than when I started typing

[Hund1976]

There isn't some secret thing you have to say. She probably already knows whether she would go out with you or not. Just try to start up a conversation and bring something up like "oh have you seen the new ____ movie?" if she says no then be like "I'd like to see it, would you want to go with me?" Just think of it like baseball, Barry Bonds doesn't knock every pitch out of the park, you have to just come out swinging and you'll get some strike outs, but if you keep trying you'll also belt out a couple homers!

[alphamale]

go up to her and say the following:

 

"hi, XXXX, I'm a bit nervous cause I haven't asked to many girls out but if you are free Friday nite can I take you out for dinner"

 

...you will find that when you tell her you are nervous up front then you will relax and she will find it endearing. esp from some dude who looks like a NFL linebacker.

 

[tanbark813]

Ditto to alphamale's response.

 

Definitely don't ask her to a movie though. Movie first dates suck.

[Bronzepen]

Even better, don't take her out to dinner.

 

Just ask her out for a cup of coffee (starbucks) and chat away.

 

You will know if she is worth pursuing further or not.

 

Go dutch. I mean it.

 

If your interested in her, then follow up with, "Hey, I am going to my favorite restaurant this (pick a day). You want to come along?" Etc.....

 

End the conversation and say you have to go. Getup and when your about to walk away just turn around and say "Do you have email?". Get a pen and paper out and say "Can you write it down for me." While she writes it down say "And put your phone number down."

 

If she gives you a hard time then she is not interested in you.

 

Move on.

 

Good luck.

[bicyclejunk]

dude, you really

gotta learn to relax. I'll admit I

was the same way. Scared to DEATH

of striking up conversation.

 

The problem is, You need to look at it like getting

to know someone, don't bring the romance or

expectations of "Am I handsome Enough", "did I sound

cool", "do I look cool"....etc etc... It'll mess you up and

you'll stumble on your words etc.

 

Take it slow and I personally wouldn't rush into a date.

I'd ask her to coffee like Bronzepen suggested. It's an

easy Ice Breaker. Don't go on a date just yet, get to know

her first. Just hang out, don't get stressed and don't hold

any expectations. Just relax and be yourself, Be cool and

ask her to a coffee. "Hey I'm going to grab a coffee, are you down for going?"

 

try it, take it slow, see what happens.