lovehurts5 Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 So my boyfriend and I moved in together 2 weeks ago and as we were unpacking all of our stuff I spotted him putting his journal into his drawer. When he lived at his parents house I knew where the journal was and joked at looking at it and he said no way I write everything in there you'd probably break up with me. With that being said..... I've been really good with giving him his privacy and not snooping. We've been together over a year and I've never snooped. But for some reason I'm so tempted to look inside that journal.... I know it's none of my business but I'm just so curious.... Link to post Share on other sites
Keke1 Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 If you do at least he warned you. Please don't 3 Link to post Share on other sites
CA2TN4Love Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 Why even open that can of worms? Leave well enough alone and respect his privacy. He trusts you enough to leave it accessible, don't destroy that trust. You can't get it back, and you may just ruin your relationship. It's not worth it. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 I usually say transparency in relationships, but journals are the ponderings of the imagination and soul. As such, things are recorded there really aren't your concern. If he was cheating that journal would be hidden away in a place you would never look so show some trust and respect and do not look at his private musings. Best, Grumps 5 Link to post Share on other sites
julzfromsa Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 is he good to you? Do you feel happy in the relationship? If that's a YES YES, Then there is no reason to look at hes journal. It really doesn't matter what is in there if you guys are happy.. If the relationship was heading south and could feel something was not right then i would look at it. Otherwise stay out. Its just normal guy ramblings. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 What do you think you'd see in there? Link to post Share on other sites
liloldlady Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 I'm so tempted to look inside that journal.... Oh, my. I have an ex who read my diaries and put me in a living hell for months because of it. Then again, he was already a lunatic. Another ex read them, and it drew him closer to me and inspired him with questions about me. I have very honest truths in my diary right now. My man has already told me he would read it and look for his name. Basically, girl, leave that man's diary alone. Just talk to him. You're going to be looking for what he wrote about you. Girl, just communicate and leave his little book alone. LOL at you spotting where he put it. Chile, stop. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 I'm a nosy body & I'd be dying to know what's in there. I'd feel my fingers itching to open that drawer & read. I also know I'd be devastated if somebody read my journal. That feeling would enable me to resist temptation. Find a way to honor his trust in you. Don't read the journal. If you have to, ask him to move it or buy him a lock box & ask him to put the journal in there without giving you access. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
liloldlady Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 I'm a nosy body & I'd be dying to know what's in there. I'd feel my fingers itching to open that drawer & read. Wrong move. I love my Man and trust that he can talk to me. I also know I'd be devastated if somebody read my journal. It is deep, no joke. Not a big deal, though, if what you're telling is real. What is there to hide? Link to post Share on other sites
sidney2718 Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 I'd leave the journal strictly alone. Absolutely nothing good can come of it. If you'd rather he hid it, tell him that. Link to post Share on other sites
Lixxy Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 he said no way I write everything in there you'd probably break up with me. Well in my eyes that one line right there is just ASKING for trouble. Who - if their partner told them that line - wouldn't be thinking... "well wtf about you and your thoughts are so incredibly terrible that I'd want to leave you!?" It's like saying, "If you knew who I REALLY am, you wouldn't want to be with me anymore". That said, I wouldn't look, but I'd be concerned about what about his true self would be so bad I'd want to leave him! I'd kind of feel like I was being lied to if he's secretly something that if I knew, I'd want to leave him. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Confuddled1983 Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 Well in my eyes that one line right there is just ASKING for trouble. Who - if their partner told them that line - wouldn't be thinking... "well wtf about you and your thoughts are so incredibly terrible that I'd want to leave you!?" It's like saying, "If you knew who I REALLY am, you wouldn't want to be with me anymore". That said, I wouldn't look, but I'd be concerned about what about his true self would be so bad I'd want to leave him! I'd kind of feel like I was being lied to if he's secretly something that if I knew, I'd want to leave him. I agree! This would make me super suspicious and it would annoy the heck out of me. It would really make me doubt the whole relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
InnocentMan Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 What kind of man keeps a journal? I think I can imagine what he writes in it. Dear diary, I think I might be gay. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MrMeh Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 What kind of man keeps a journal? I think I can imagine what he writes in it. Dear diary, I think I might be gay. Well that was ignorant.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
InnocentMan Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 Well that was ignorant.. I forgot the smiley face. I thought the intended humour was implied. For the record, I think it's perfectly normal for a heterosexual man to keep a journal in his pantie drawer. Link to post Share on other sites
Poppygoodwill Posted January 21, 2014 Share Posted January 21, 2014 I forgot the smiley face. I thought the intended humour was implied. For the record, I think it's perfectly normal for a heterosexual man to keep a journal in his pantie drawer. boring. not smiley face Link to post Share on other sites
JamesM Posted January 21, 2014 Share Posted January 21, 2014 Journals are a place for expressing feelings such as sadness and anger and excitement and...well, pretty much everything AS YOU FEEL AT THE MOMENT YOU WRITE IT. The capital part is the part that can make or break a relationship. Example. I found a note my son wrote when he was really angry at me. I found it a year later. Yeah, like many of us....he wrote how he hated me and wanted to run away...except his mom would miss him. Now, I could get mad or sad or whatever, but I knew that it was in the past. I know what caused it. (Yes, it did hurt when I read it, but more so I was so sad for how he felt that I went and gave him a big hug. He had no clue why. ) So, you read his journal and see something that really annoys you, hurts you, angers you or saddens you. He could even mention how he felt towards you at the time. You mention it to him. He says that was how he felt then. You don't believe him. A big fight starts. Your relationship is over. All because you read his journal and misinterpreted something. LS is my journal. I have considered sharing it with my wife but I won't for two reasons: 1. As mentioned above, many things I have posted over the past 8 years were how I felt then. Some are not. I do not want to explain any of them. 2. If I know she knows about LS and will read what I post, essentially I no longer will feel free to post how I feel. So with your BF. You read his past entries, and you end his journalling. Not only will he feel angry at the breach of privacy, but he will feel that you do not respect him nor trust him. And to top it all off, he will have no place to express how he feels which will create some inner frustrations...that could spill out into your relationship. So....will it be worth it? Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted January 26, 2014 Share Posted January 26, 2014 You feel tempted to look for a good reason. I trust my boyfriend enough to not feel that tempted . Of course, he could be a lying cheater. My gut feeling isn't setting of alarm bells though. I had a bad feeling about my cheating ex...... I looked through all his emails when given a chance and it turns out he was sexting hundreds of women online. Link to post Share on other sites
allenpo123 Posted January 26, 2014 Share Posted January 26, 2014 Haha.. I know how you feel. If I were you I would be soooo curious to know!!! But... don't.... don't snoop.. Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted January 28, 2014 Share Posted January 28, 2014 Haha.. I know how you feel. If I were you I would be soooo curious to know!!! But... don't.... don't snoop.. Ya I agree. Nothing good will come from it and you;ll over analyse his thoughts. But if I was in your position, not even gunna lie, I'd read the **** outta that. Link to post Share on other sites
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