Kokoro-Fan Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Hello. I am interested in dating this girl and recently found out she is christian on her facebook. She is very religious. It is still very early but I am interested in dating her. But I am atheist and was wondering if a relationship with a christian can work? I have to say that I am open minded. I respect people's opinions and beliefs. I personally don't like it when people shove their beliefs down other's throats. Or religious people against homosexuals, etc. This isn't the case with her (at least for now). Other than those things, I have no problem at all. I am not the type of atheist that puts down people's beliefs. Infact the girl and I might share somethings in common like we don't drink or do drugs and I hardly ever swear (which I find attractive in a girl nowadays). But yeah, she's been on my mind a lot. We haven't really talked much or anything and we are still getting to know each other. I am basing a lot of this simply on her facebook. Anybody have any feedback or know an atheist + very religious couple? Link to post Share on other sites
MixedUpChick Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 My personal opinion is that you can have a relationship with different beliefs, as long as both are respectful of the other person's beliefs & neither tries to change the other. I'm Christian & I once had a relationship with an atheist, he told me he couldn't understand how people could be so gullible as to believe in God... I wouldn't recommend that approach Long term, if your relationship turns into something serious & you eventually marry &/or have kids, you'll have to make decisions about how to incorporate what each of you believes, but that's not something to sweat over right now. Just keep in mind that down the road you may have to figure some things out in that regard. Link to post Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Couples of differing religious beliefs or differing views on religion can have a meaningful relationship, as long as there is mutual respect, understanding, and neither member is trying proselytize the other toward their personal views. You and this girl should discuss this matter eventually if feelings blossom, but until then you can keep it light to gauge each other's views. The God-Emperor of Man protects. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
trevzilla Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 If she reads her Bible she would not entertain it. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 It depends on how zealous each other is in their views. Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 A relationship is possible I believe . But I do not think having kids and raising them can be successful unless one party completely withdrawals their belief from child raising. Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 I think it's possible if neither is a zealot. I tried having a relationship with a woman who was extremely religious. I consider myself Christian because I was raised that way, but am a free thinker and have nothing in common with fundamentalists. So it was ok for awhile. I went to services and mostly enjoyed being there, but after several months "it" was overreaching. The expectation was that I would always conform. So I think the religious half of the couple needs to be pretty darn laid back to keep from upping the ante after things get started. Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Considering the level she takes her belief on her Facebook page, chances are you will not have a chance. It would likely be rather unthinkable for her. Funny thing,a couple of women I saw online had "Non-Religious" on their POF account profile page. Each of them, after having contacted them, were fully, self-declared atheists. Deal breaker, sorry. Then I saw one woman had "Non-Religoius" in her profile and "Freethinker" (which is a new word that ties into atheism these days). I then emailed her asking her belief system, and she acutally said she's Christian, just of the Non-Denominational variety. Good thing I got clarification. LOL Non-Denon = Non-religious as well. Hello. I am interested in dating this girl and recently found out she is christian on her facebook. She is very religious. It is still very early but I am interested in dating her. But I am atheist and was wondering if a relationship with a christian can work? I have to say that I am open minded. I respect people's opinions and beliefs. I personally don't like it when people shove their beliefs down other's throats. Or religious people against homosexuals, etc. This isn't the case with her (at least for now). Other than those things, I have no problem at all. I am not the type of atheist that puts down people's beliefs. Infact the girl and I might share somethings in common like we don't drink or do drugs and I hardly ever swear (which I find attractive in a girl nowadays). But yeah, she's been on my mind a lot. We haven't really talked much or anything and we are still getting to know each other. I am basing a lot of this simply on her facebook. Anybody have any feedback or know an atheist + very religious couple? Link to post Share on other sites
irc333 Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 he told me he couldn't understand how people could be so gullible as to believe in God. Yeah, there are some atheists that really rub me the wrong way when they are that insensitive. I've known them to say , "How can anyone believe in such fairy tale nonsense!" I've known most atheists to keep their yapper shut about what they think, but if you want to lose friendships, that's the way to do it. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Considering the level she takes her belief on her Facebook page, chances are you will not have a chance. It would likely be rather unthinkable for her. Funny thing,a couple of women I saw online had "Non-Religious" on their POF account profile page. Each of them, after having contacted them, were fully, self-declared atheists. Deal breaker, sorry. Then I saw one woman had "Non-Religoius" in her profile and "Freethinker" (which is a new word that ties into atheism these days). I then emailed her asking her belief system, and she acutally said she's Christian, just of the Non-Denominational variety. Good thing I got clarification. LOL Non-Denon = Non-religious as well. Actually, non-denominational does not mean non-religious. It just means that it is a Christian faith that does not adhere specifically to an established denomination. I belong to a non-denominational church and attend services there regularly, and belonged to a non-denominational church in the state I lived prior to where I live now. I consider myself pretty religious (attend church regularly, am actively involved in church, pray regularly and my beliefs are consistent with the teaching of the Bible). My son is also a leader in a non-denominational church. I used to belong to the Lutheran denomination, but the non-denominational churchs I've found seem to have more content in their sermons and seem to be more in keeping with what the Bible teaches. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MixedUpChick Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 Yeah, there are some atheists that really rub me the wrong way when they are that insensitive. I've known them to say , "How can anyone believe in such fairy tale nonsense!" I've known most atheists to keep their yapper shut about what they think, but if you want to lose friendships, that's the way to do it. Yes but... he was the self-proclaimed "smartest man he knows" Just not the smartest man I know, which is one reason I'm no longer with him Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 Hello. I am interested in dating this girl and recently found out she is christian on her facebook. She is very religious. It is still very early but I am interested in dating her. But I am atheist and was wondering if a relationship with a christian can work? I have to say that I am open minded. I respect people's opinions and beliefs. I personally don't like it when people shove their beliefs down other's throats. Or religious people against homosexuals, etc. This isn't the case with her (at least for now). Other than those things, I have no problem at all. I am not the type of atheist that puts down people's beliefs. Infact the girl and I might share somethings in common like we don't drink or do drugs and I hardly ever swear (which I find attractive in a girl nowadays). But yeah, she's been on my mind a lot. We haven't really talked much or anything and we are still getting to know each other. I am basing a lot of this simply on her facebook. Anybody have any feedback or know an atheist + very religious couple? Not sure why anyone would even want that. I am honestly confused about this every time I see it, i.e. why you would even want to date someone with a fundamentally different worldview than yours. I don't think most genuinely religious people who govern their lives based on their religious beliefs and its attendant practices will want to date an atheist and an atheist dating them may find it a problem too. I am spiritual but not religious and would not desire to date a very religious man neither an atheist, as our ways of looking at the world will be so different that it will most likely cause problems. Link to post Share on other sites
MixedUpChick Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 (edited) My personal opinion is that you can have a relationship with different beliefs, as long as both are respectful of the other person's beliefs & neither tries to change the other. Yes... I'm quoting my earlier post, because I think it's relevant here. My thoughts are that although it's not my preference to date someone with different religious beliefs, it's already hard enough to meet someone. I'm pretty flexible on most things & this is definitely an area I can bend on, if I had kids who were still at home & would be affected by it I'm sure I'd feel differently. For someone younger who hasn't had kids yet or has kids still at home, it would be a much bigger concern because holidays & how you celebrate them can come into play, as well as other things. I guess for me, it's a benefit of being older Edited January 19, 2014 by MixedUpChick Link to post Share on other sites
Allumere Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 If she is a devoted Christian and is of the more conservative variety then a) she won't date you or b) she will date you but then she will feel guilty and see you as the the reason she is not putting God first or c) her minister or other conservative christian friends will advise that you are not equally yoked and she will dump you or d) God will tell her that he has something else for her, you aren't the one, and you will be dumped. Are there exceptions, sure, but based on experience and reading everything written on the topic on the internet the patterns I posted above are the norm. The beliefs aren't a negative or wrong...it is their truth. Unfortunately though they do not always know themselves well and get sucked into all the romantic feelings of a relationship (and I am not even talking about having sex, just the emotions) and, well, forget themselves for a bit and sadly can and will hurt the other person because of their devotion to God and the acknowledgement that they were not keeping him first and foremost. Link to post Share on other sites
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