mikegrunt0331 Posted January 20, 2014 Share Posted January 20, 2014 My wife of 7 months has informed me that she no longer loves me. I was floored. Before we were married we were together for 6 years. Is there the possibility that she is cheating or is she just done? I asked her and she said there was no one else. We have a 3 year old son together and we both agree to be as decent to each other as we can during this process. I don't hate her and she doesn't hate me I'm just crushed. She has already told me she is scared to be on her own. I really don't know what to do. Its just so sudden. She says its because I have a bad temper but I have never hit her or abused her or my son. She told me she is scared of me and is worried that I may snap some day. Could this be true or do you think there is more to the story? I'm hurt and confused and don't know what to do. Link to post Share on other sites
RightThere Posted January 20, 2014 Share Posted January 20, 2014 What was your wife like shortly before she dropped the bomb on you? Out with friends a lot? Working a lot? Another guy in the picture is possible, but hard to say without knowing if you thought you saw red flags indicating that. Did the two of you fight a lot? When you did fight, how did they go? Anything get thrown? Link to post Share on other sites
familygone Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 STBX said that to me to there isnt another guy,but later i found out she had a meet with some other guy.Then twoface lie to me.And put the blame on me.like what RIGHTTHERE SAID:WHATWAS SHE LIKE BEFORE THIS STARTED? Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 Truth be told, I'm pretty sure she's at the very least interested in someone else. I'm so sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 My wife of 7 months has informed me that she no longer loves me. I was floored. Before we were married we were together for 6 years. Is there the possibility that she is cheating or is she just done? I asked her and she said there was no one else. We have a 3 year old son together and we both agree to be as decent to each other as we can during this process. I don't hate her and she doesn't hate me I'm just crushed. She has already told me she is scared to be on her own. I really don't know what to do. Its just so sudden. She says its because I have a bad temper but I have never hit her or abused her or my son. She told me she is scared of me and is worried that I may snap some day. Could this be true or do you think there is more to the story? I'm hurt and confused and don't know what to do. This is BS. You know why? Because if she really felt this way, why didn't she leave during the past 6 years? Why didn't she take herself and her son out of the equation before now? OP, is there a history we should know more about? Has she pulled this stuff before? Do you think maybe she married you as an impulse, to make her son 'legitimate' and ensure your continued support, or could there - just could there - be a hidden 'agenda' on her part? Link to post Share on other sites
keepontruckin Posted January 23, 2014 Share Posted January 23, 2014 Mike, your wife is full of *****. Together for six years, leaves a marriage after seven months? That's almost similar to what my wife did. Look, we were both victims of the "starter marriage." It's what women (seems to be mostly women) do to "test" out if they like marriage or not. My wife (we've been separated for 10 months) told me the other day that she wasn't "ready" for marriage. Look... We both got played like fools. And she will make up any excuse to justify her leaving. Why? She has to justify it. Not only to herself, but to her friends and family also. And my wife? Still single. Hasn't met anyone else. However, the thought of marriage scares these people. Why? They can't imagine living their life being faced with just your cock. They want to leave themselves open for many more cocks. And that, my friend, is the fact of the matter. My wife has a long history of moving from relationship to relationship. They always come up with some bull***** excuse. You are no different than her last, and the next guy she meets will be no different than you. He'll get played also. They will get theirs, bud. Cut her out of your life, and give her nothing. Even if she comes back 10 months later, ignore her for the scum that she is. I just learned it, again, last week. Do NOT contact, and wipe them out of your life, because they truly are ugly people deep down inside. Link to post Share on other sites
thedmc Posted January 24, 2014 Share Posted January 24, 2014 I agree with keepontruckin. Together for nearly 7 years with a kid and now she wants out over your "anger" problems, What a load of bull. You should tell her if you want out then get out now. Pack her things, Put them in a car, and send her on her merry way. Tell her that you are keeping your son because she is quitting on this marriage, Not you. Let's see how quickly she comes crawling back when she realizes how tough it is without someone there to support her. Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted January 24, 2014 Share Posted January 24, 2014 I am really surprised at the feedback in this thread. If his wife feels he has a terrible temper and she is scared of him, this isn't about another man but about verbal and mental abuse. Most domestic violence situations escalates over time so though she may have been with him for years, he may have just started as things in his life became difficult or work relationships, family obligations became strenuous. Honestly, jumping on the wife is cheating in you every time someone leaves a marriage is just reflex for most posters here because of their own situations. Sometimes an emotional,entail and verbal abuser doesn't know they are one because they are just emulating behaviors from their own parents marriages or how they were treated as children. I am not saying this is the case, but it seems from what he wrote the more likely scenarios than cheating spouse since she verbally told him this is what it is and he has no proof of cheating. OP, you need to set up MC ASAP if you want to really understand what is going on with this situation. Consider, have you changed towards your wife for outside reasons? Are you moody, temperamental, or feel the world is against you? Have you been calling her names, yelling at her, ignoring her, or saying violent things to her about hurting her or killing her? Are you controlling her or belittling her efforts with her work, everyday chores, or the child? If she is afraid you will snap, that doesn't come out of nowhere. You have to be honest with yourself and ask yourself if you have done anything to warrant that? We can't really help you if you concentrate on the hypothetical other man because you are jealous and controlling, or you want to be in denial about your true behavior towards her...only you know what is going on, but you need to be really honest with yourself on what constitutes abuse. Sometimes it isn't physical violence, but may be verbal, mental, emotional and neglect. Listen to what she says without judgement or anger and get back to us, Grumps 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 24, 2014 Share Posted January 24, 2014 (edited) My wife of 7 months has informed me that she no longer loves me. I was floored. Before we were married we were together for 6 years. Is there the possibility that she is cheating or is she just done? I asked her and she said there was no one else. We have a 3 year old son together and we both agree to be as decent to each other as we can during this process. I don't hate her and she doesn't hate me I'm just crushed. She has already told me she is scared to be on her own. I really don't know what to do. Its just so sudden. She says its because I have a bad temper but I have never hit her or abused her or my son. She told me she is scared of me and is worried that I may snap some day. Could this be true or do you think there is more to the story? I'm hurt and confused and don't know what to do. So after 6 years of being together, 3 years with your child as a family unit, 7 months after marriage, she's scared of your temper, that you'll snap someday? Did this come up in the past? If so, did counseling happen? Or is this a new fear of hers? If this is new, then there's a big chance she's met someone else and got too attached to them and sadly, she's re written some history to justify what she is doing. Just stay calm...Talk to a trusted friend and ask them to follow her (someone that she would never notice) just to see if she is where she says she is when going out.) have you noticed any changes in her behaviour overall? Does she hide her phone from you? Text a lot? I suggest counseling....If she isn't cheating...To throw away a marriage without trying to fix it is something she may regret and you both owe it to your child to give it your best and keep your family unit intact under one roof. She says its because I have a bad temper but I have never hit her or abused her or my son. She told me she is scared of me and is worried that I may snap some day. Could this be true or do you think there is more to the story? Only you can answer this. Do you have a temper that gets out of control? Enough to scare her and make her worry that some day you're gonna lose it and snap? If this really is the truth and she feels this way and there's nobody else waiting in the wings, then you need to get to anger management and talk to a therapist to help you. Hopefully she will not throw in the towel yet.. Edited January 24, 2014 by whichwayisup Link to post Share on other sites
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