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Should I be worried?


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lastgoodbye17

I've read so many posts about wives going out for lunch with their bosses, and texting the boss after hours, talking about the boss all the time and many replies have said that is inappropriate and there is probably more going on because those things lead to other things between a woman and a man. But what if my wife's boss is a woman and so am I? (we are a lesbian couple) My wife wants to have friends and of course most of them are women, but this throws a curve ball into the picture. My wife is attracted to women, so I am extremely jealous when she wants to spend time with "friends" without me. My wife has never been unfaithful in any relationship so I have no reason to mistrust her, but I am worried. My wife is working long hours, attending conferences with her boss, working out with her boss, and going for wine after work with her boss. She will not pick up the phone or return texts when they are together. She is extremely worried about what her boss thinks of her. She is worried when her boss isn't where she is supposed to be at a certain time, or when she is sitting at a table at the Christmas party alone. She went out of her way to find a hard-to-find bottle of wine ($50) for her boss for Christmas and her boss gave her a charm for her bracelet which is worth $100 or more. Her boss has also sent her flowers to say what a good job she is doing. They text each other every day, even though they spend most days in side-by-side offices, and usually in the evenings too. I have met her boss and she has never been very friendly to me. I have met the boss's husband, too, and they seem to have a good relationship. This is a new job for my wife, only four months in. Should I be worried that there is more to this and that the continual bonding between them will lead to stronger feelings? I am a jealous and insecure person and I need some perspective!

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I don't think the status of work colleagues or appropriate professional boundaries changes based on the sexual orientation of the participants. OK sure, your wife may end up in the ladies' room with her boss but that doesn't mean they are doing anything other than using the room for it's intended purpose.

 

 

Work colleagues need to interact. Some office cultures include gift giving.

 

 

Your jealous nature doesn't make her behavior inappropriate.

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