Just want to rest my soul

[Kuley]

Hello All, as what the title said, I've been restless since last night and i haven't gotten any sleep I cannot talk to anyone about this bec. I consider it as a sensitive part of my boyfriend's life so I just want to share it with some strangers like you guys, im sorry this is going to be long..

 

I met my boyfriend online last year August, we spent a month just having a small talk every now and then since we both have a very busy work, I was then working in a U.S Military base producing Unit Deployment Plaques to these people came from their deployments and him as a Manufacturing Engineer in Australia, he is divorced with 2 kids, son is 13 and daughter is 10, me on the other hand don't have kids yet. Until things get serious for both of us and i told him if he is really interested to me, he should come over and get to know me in person including my family then the day after he talked to his kids about his plans and then he bought ticket to see me and be with me for 6 days started Dec. 01,13, he told me that's the only thing he can do for now due to his kids and work, things went really great, better than i ever thought it would be and i believe he did feel the same thing. He took care of me and my family, he is a generous man and he always want to make sure I am happy, he is really wonderful and treated me good that no one else did. He went back to his country and left me heartbroken and longing for him, after he left i took a break from my job bec. I wasn't functioning well at work since he left, and bec. I work with hundred of military guys everyday, i get compliments and attentions and even though i tell them I have a boyfriend they didn't care since my boyfriend isnt with me they will still try to do things and will do everything to make me cheat to him so i choose to stay away from temptations. From the day I love my boyfriend I dedicate myself to him.

 

Now i help my friend selling perfumes, colognes, lotions and whole a lot more to make a little money before I will get a new job and then my boyfriend helps me every now and then to pay my bills that i cant pay for now and he always want to make sure im happy and im taken care of which im grateful to God, he really gave me a good man that I can depend with. Then we came to the point we were feeling lonely without each other so much it really hurts so my boyfriend arranged a tourist visa for me to go to his country and since im in a high-risk country we had to prepare a lot of requirements which is all done now and hopefully by next month i will see and be with my wonderful sweetheart again..

 

But there are things that i don't understand about my boyfriend, he is not that openly about his personal life, well maybe that is why he wants me to come there so that i can meet everyone personally, I already talked to his kids twice on a messenger and his parents and friends knew me and cannot wait to meet me in person as per him, my boyfriend has the full custody of his kids and all he tells me that his ex-wife is really a bad person and did awful stuff which he dislike. My boyfriend told me that he has a fb which he only keep to keep track on his kids does online, he wasn't on my fb so i tried everything to searched him last night, after one hour of trying to locate him i was successful and he didnt lie, nothing is really on his fb but i found his kids profiles and it warmth my heart seeing them.. so i searched some more so that when i get to Australia i already know the faces of the people I am going to meet until i stumble upon the profile of his ex-wife.. I must admit, his ex-wife is really beautiful woman and great body and she is a nude artist/model and i felt insecure, i looked at myself in the mirror and i asked myself why did he see in me which is funny bec. when my boyfriend looks at me he always make me feel like I am the most beautiful girl in the world.. And that my boyfriend is a good looking guy as well, i maybe dont tell him much bec. I dont want him to feel too proud about it.. I really felt so insecure and his ex-wife looks is still on my mind and i feel like i am nothing compared to her... Its funny how my confidence just left me just like that. As I stalked her profile I found out that she is fascinated in something dark or people might call them satanist, and then i saw a picture of my boyfriend's daughter in the middle of like a ritual with some disturbing props beside her, the ex-wife doesnt seem to care about it and my boyfriend was so mad about it, well now im scared of her and im sure when i get there I will see her when she pick up the kids every other weekends, i just dont want a drama and i want to spend time with the kids but i feel somehow that im an outsider. Thank you for reading, I just want to vent and I just want to free my soul, take care ya'll.

[justwhoiam]

However beautiful she is, they broke up and he wants to be with you. Half of your beauty will come from self confidence, so don't let insecurities ruin your relationship.

 

Regarding satanism, maybe she's just a wannabe, or maybe she's really into scary/gross rituals. No wonder he got full custody. See if the children need a mother figure or motherly love. Be patient with them, they might have problems because of their current situation. I don't think children can live their life unaffected by the lack of a mother. If they went through some kind of abuse, it'll be even harder.

 

If you meet her, just smile and don't engage in any conversation, unless she prompts you. Give her as little information about you as possible, spare the details.

Like

She: What do you do for a living?

You: I work in commerce.

She: What kind?

You: Technology stuff.

Don't share anything personal with her.

 

Good luck