clairedunham Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 We speak everyday and I tell him I love him and he says it back but sorta like annoyed at times. I never see him though. He does not want me back. I have begged for like a 30 seconds and then stop cause he says no. He says he does not want to get hurt again by me because I used to insult him a lot with my jealousy and paranoid thoughts. I even pushed him once cause he was being a jerk. he didn't fall he is a big muscular guy. He does not want me at all. He says that we may get back and we may not. I dont know what to do. Link to post Share on other sites
pickflicker Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 No contact. It's done, time to move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author clairedunham Posted January 29, 2014 Author Share Posted January 29, 2014 Thats what everyone says. But he says he does love me Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 Thats what everyone says. But he says he does love me If he loves you enough, he will come to you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 Thats what everyone says. But he says he does love me If he truly loved you, he would be with you currently. Quit going on this carousel you've been going on for months. Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 We speak everyday and I tell him I love him and he says it back but sorta like annoyed at times. I never see him though. He does not want me back. I have begged for like a 30 seconds and then stop cause he says no. He says he does not want to get hurt again by me because I used to insult him a lot with my jealousy and paranoid thoughts. I even pushed him once cause he was being a jerk. he didn't fall he is a big muscular guy. He does not want me at all. He says that we may get back and we may not. I dont know what to do. Oh honey we are in the same boat. Ex says he doesnt know if we will ornwe wont be back. You shouldnt beg him, i did it yesterday and learnt the hard way. Listen to everyone here , dont beg. I know how you feel ,trust me. begging wont get him back. You need to move on. Take it from me, I lost my dignity begging my ex and him being cold and blaming me. Go NC. Show him what he is missing. Listen to everyone here. You dont have to beg anyone. You dont deserve it. We are here for you 4 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 If he loves you enough, he will come to you. Read this again and again ^ and even if he doesnt , he didnt deserve your love. Thats what my motto is anyway but the only difference is I wont take him back 2 Link to post Share on other sites
pickflicker Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 Thats what everyone says. But he says he does love me Round, and round, and round. No he doesn't. If he loved you, he'd be with you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 (edited) Round, and round, and round. No he doesn't. If he loved you, he'd be with you. True words Edited January 29, 2014 by skydiveaddict Link to post Share on other sites
strive Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 What you're doing is a sure fire way that you'll never get back together. Ever. Here: Breakup Recovery Guide Read it. Follow it to the letter. Stop the cycle of self harm. Link to post Share on other sites
Envy_rodge Posted January 29, 2014 Share Posted January 29, 2014 (edited) Consider the behavior you exhibited that made him not like you anymore. Don't repeat it in your next relationship. You probably don't truly want him back, you just feel that way. It sounds like you didn't respect him, and a woman can't love a man she doesn't respect. I think its just your ego hurting, women usually do the dumping because they can't handle rejection like men can. Oh and maybe he "loves" you, but he is not in love with you anymore. He will probably talk with you because he feels guilty, but don't take this as hope. Edited January 29, 2014 by Envy_rodge Link to post Share on other sites
Author clairedunham Posted February 26, 2014 Author Share Posted February 26, 2014 I've cried, stalked, begged and well obviously nothing seems to work. I have no resources but to use the NC. I've suffered a lot but it is because of my own doing, though I tried to fix only to end up with cold shoulders and his "I only care about you" bull**** and that we should just be friends. Everytime I ask him if we might get back together he says he doesn't know. He tells me he doesnt love me anymore. It hurts so bad. No more calling No more texting No more anything!!! I've suffered a lot in my life and now he is just throwing me away like garbage. We wanted to be together forever. Guys are ****in scumbags!!! Dont know what they want! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 I've cried, stalked, begged and well obviously nothing seems to work. I have no resources but to use the NC. I've suffered a lot but it is because of my own doing, though I tried to fix only to end up with cold shoulders and his "I only care about you" bull**** and that we should just be friends. Everytime I ask him if we might get back together he says he doesn't know. He tells me he doesnt love me anymore. It hurts so bad. No more calling No more texting No more anything!!! I've suffered a lot in my life and now he is just throwing me away like garbage. We wanted to be together forever. Guys are ****in scumbags!!! Dont know what they want! I hope you actually stop contacting him this time. Save yourself any more of this grief. For what its worth, not all guys are what you are calling them. Link to post Share on other sites
lvroflife Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 (edited) Obviously you are angry and that is fine ... Not all Men are what you say they are. Read my story and the other men on here who have given their hearts only to be rejected. Remember that LOVE doesn't hurt but people do... Now you have every right to be hurt, confused, sad, lonely, and angry because your heart is heavy. But let me tell you something, when you get through this you will be STRONGER than ever. Now he can not give you an answer as to if you two will be together later, because he honestly doesn't know. I do not know what happened between you two but it is best to go NC. As I am sure you know, it is for you and not for hopes of him to come back. And while in NC learn what the lesson was in your relationship with him. Vent all you want, but try not to bad mouth him because at one point he was exactly what you wanted. And guess what? By you switching the focus on you...later when you are healed you may looknback and say "why did ever want him"... So give your self time to heal! Allow all the emotions to flow, do not fight any of them let them take control so they can be released, and ALWAYS BE GOOD TO YOURSELF!! Edited February 26, 2014 by lvroflife 2 Link to post Share on other sites
pickflicker Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 I've cried, stalked, begged and well obviously nothing seems to work. I have no resources but to use the NC. I've suffered a lot but it is because of my own doing, though I tried to fix only to end up with cold shoulders and his "I only care about you" bull**** and that we should just be friends. Everytime I ask him if we might get back together he says he doesn't know. He tells me he doesnt love me anymore. It hurts so bad. No more calling No more texting No more anything!!! I've suffered a lot in my life and now he is just throwing me away like garbage. We wanted to be together forever. Guys are ****in scumbags!!! Dont know what they want! You do know what he wants. He told you. 'I don't know' is code for 'I don't love you enough.' Learn to speak the language. Link to post Share on other sites
lvroflife Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Obviously you are angry and that is fine ... Not all Men are what you say they are. Read my story and the other men on here who have given their hearts only to be rejected. Remember that LOVE doesn't hurt but people do... Now you have every right to be hurt, confused, sad, lonely, and angry because your heart his heavy. But let me tell you something, when you get through this you will be STRONGER than ever. Now he can not give you answer if you two will be together later, because he honestly doesn't know. I do not know what happened between you two but is best to go NC. As I am sure you know for you and not in hopes for him to come back. And while in NC learn what the lesson was in your relationship with him. Vent all you want, but try not to bad mouth him because at one point he was exactly what you wanted. And guess what? By you switching the focus on you...later when you are healed you may look back and say "why did ever want him"... So give your self time to heal! Allow all the emotions to flow, do not fight any of them let them take control so they can be released, and ALWAYS BE GOOD TO YOURSELF!! Link to post Share on other sites
WYSWYG Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 It's hard to accept that they no longer care about us like they use to but months from now, Claire you will look back to these days without feeling any of this pain. You'll likely be a better person by then, learning from this. And he will no longer be that special. You need to go and stay NC. I did right away. I was still in love w/ her when we BU but I didn't wanna be part of that vicious cycle anymore. It was hard to walk away but I had to make a choice. We need to heal and take care of ourselves and we are capable of that. This forum helped me get thru the BU. Let it go, accept the pain, let it fortify you and know that it will not last forever. Link to post Share on other sites
LostConfused123 Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 I'm sorry you're in such pain. I really am. I know how much it hurts. And God, does it hurt!!! I am absolutely positive you will find love from a great man when you're ready. I know it doesn't seem that way now and you could probably care less right now. Totally understandable!! Best of luck!! ((hugs!!)) Link to post Share on other sites
loversquarrel Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 I've cried, stalked, begged and well obviously nothing seems to work. I have no resources but to use the NC. I've suffered a lot but it is because of my own doing, though I tried to fix only to end up with cold shoulders and his "I only care about you" bull**** and that we should just be friends. Everytime I ask him if we might get back together he says he doesn't know. He tells me he doesnt love me anymore. It hurts so bad. No more calling No more texting No more anything!!! I've suffered a lot in my life and now he is just throwing me away like garbage. We wanted to be together forever. Guys are ****in scumbags!!! Dont know what they want! I could tell you a story about how two women effed me over pretty badly back to back. It would make your head spin. Link to post Share on other sites
Author clairedunham Posted February 26, 2014 Author Share Posted February 26, 2014 Thoughts of hope and hopelessness cloud my mind. It is bearable to a certain degree until I burst out in tears because of the fear of not knowing what's going to happen . I ruined up the r/s. He says "I tried" but I always accused him of not loving me enough and doubted him. Now I'm just trying to figure out how to get him back without calling him and with absolutely no line of communication. It is a pathetic state to be in for me and for anybody. I actually woke up sick today. I could use a massage. If any guys out there were to give me any advice to "lure" him back in? What would it be? On April I got two tickets for a concert we were supposed to go together. (he really wants to go). I bought the tickets. What do I do now? Link to post Share on other sites
pickflicker Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Thoughts of hope and hopelessness cloud my mind. It is bearable to a certain degree until I burst out in tears because of the fear of not knowing what's going to happen . I ruined up the r/s. He says "I tried" but I always accused him of not loving me enough and doubted him. Now I'm just trying to figure out how to get him back without calling him and with absolutely no line of communication. It is a pathetic state to be in for me and for anybody. I actually woke up sick today. I could use a massage. If any guys out there were to give me any advice to "lure" him back in? What would it be? On April I got two tickets for a concert we were supposed to go together. (he really wants to go). I bought the tickets. What do I do now? You can't do anything. He's gone. Now is the time to regain your dignity, pick yourself up, and move on. Sell the tickets. Delete his details. Move forward. Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Thoughts of hope and hopelessness cloud my mind. It is bearable to a certain degree until I burst out in tears because of the fear of not knowing what's going to happen . I ruined up the r/s. He says "I tried" but I always accused him of not loving me enough and doubted him. Now I'm just trying to figure out how to get him back without calling him and with absolutely no line of communication. It is a pathetic state to be in for me and for anybody. I actually woke up sick today. I could use a massage. If any guys out there were to give me any advice to "lure" him back in? What would it be? On April I got two tickets for a concert we were supposed to go together. (he really wants to go). I bought the tickets. What do I do now? So you cuss him out in your last message and now you are trying to "lure" hum back? You can't make people care about you. Either they do or they don't. Its been very clear that he doesnt, but you're obsessed into thinking you can change it. YOU CANNOT. All you are doing is getting really annoying to him. He already told you how he feels, so accept it and move on. Get rid of the tickets. You shouldn't have bought them to begin with. Keep moving forward. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Thoughts of hope and hopelessness cloud my mind. It is bearable to a certain degree until I burst out in tears because of the fear of not knowing what's going to happen . I ruined up the r/s. He says "I tried" but I always accused him of not loving me enough and doubted him. Now I'm just trying to figure out how to get him back without calling him and with absolutely no line of communication. It is a pathetic state to be in for me and for anybody. I actually woke up sick today. I could use a massage. If any guys out there were to give me any advice to "lure" him back in? What would it be? On April I got two tickets for a concert we were supposed to go together. (he really wants to go). I bought the tickets. What do I do now? Sell the tickets, or take someone else. Stop trying to come up with ways to cheapen yourself to "lure" a man who doesn't want you to lure him. Leave him alone and work on yourself. The worst thing you can do is to continue what you've been doing. It's obvious that your refusal to go No Contact hasn't done anything but make you more of a mess, so why are you trying to get advice on how to manipulate him to do what you want? Isn't it obvious at this point that bull-headedly running head first into a brick wall isn't going to give you anything but a headache? Stop the insanity and start to heal. Link to post Share on other sites
guest572 Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 You said you had already tried everything and nothing worked. There is nothing more you can do. You gave it your best shot, now call it a day. Protect yourself with NC, don't worry about what he is thinking or whether you can get him back. It will be difficult but soon you will feel better for it. Take a friend to the concert instead to kick off your recovery. Link to post Share on other sites
kpkballer Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 From my past experience. DO NOT Call him anymore im serious. The sooner you go no contact i will guarantee you a week Maybe 2 he will contact you. Out of sight out of mind, If he truley loves you he will Call you in no more than 2 weeks. Link to post Share on other sites
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