Author Discover Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 You were so great to your ex that she felt ''complexated'' by your loving gestures. She wouldn't treat you the way you treated her, something like that. Op are you falling for bubblesbursted ? In other circumstances maybe I would fall for her, but right now there is : age,location,the holes in which we are right now etc. you understand. Maybe in another world but not this one,I just find her an awesome friend (meaning in here) and I would really like her to be happy 1 Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 In other circumstances maybe I would fall for her, but right now there is : age,location,the holes in which we are right now etc. you understand. Maybe in another world but not this one,I just find her an awesome friend (meaning in here) and I would really like her to be happy You guys "click" very well and i'm sure if it weren't for those circumstances you would make a very nice couple,( maybe it's just me) 2 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 You were so great to your ex that she felt ''complexated'' by your loving gestures. She wouldn't treat you the way you treated her, something like that. Exactly what I meant. In other circumstances maybe I would fall for her, but right now there is : age,location,the holes in which we are right now etc. you understand. Maybe in another world but not this one,I just find her an awesome friend (meaning in here) and I would really like her to be happy Aww. I am so thrilled that you consider me an "awesome" friend . Thanks buddy! You are one great friend too! Kept me sane for most of the time. You guys "click" very well and i'm sure if it weren't for those circumstances you would make a very nice couple,( maybe it's just me) Thats because I understand what he is going through , I wont want him to go through it. He deserves better than that , Maybe in some another world Ps : Thats really nice of you to say that we "click" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Maybe we could all meet in this other world you speak of 1 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Maybe we could all meet in this other world you speak of Other world with no jerkface exes and everyone living happily! Sure! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Discover Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 (edited) Other world with no jerkface exes and everyone living happily! Sure! Hey guys..honestly today I feel extremely bad and i am so worried right now about the fact that tomorrow i am going to see her again..It is night and I feel so alone, it hurts my very existence,I want to call her and tell her how much I love her...I want to kiss her tomorrow.. Edited February 4, 2014 by Discover 1 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Hey guys..honestly today I feel extremely bad and i am so worried right now about the fact that tomorrow i am going to see her again..It is night and I feel so alone, it hurts my very existence,I want to call her and tell her how much I love her...I want to kiss her tomorrow.. No no no! Dont think about that. Remember what xunknown said?Think of her negative traits. Think! Think hard. Its not worth it.. Dont kiss her until she comes directly to you and tells you she wants to be with you. Dont hurt yourself more. Get mad, disappointed but not this. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Discover Posted February 5, 2014 Author Share Posted February 5, 2014 Guys,I am about to cry... I had an amazing day despite the fact that she was there.the kind,loving look of her covering me is killing me...the way she acts..everything and I am just scared cause I want to kiss her soo damn much ( like xUnknown suggested) but it is scary as I don't want to hurt her (funny right...) Everything was amazing, I have never actually played better than today at my practise in a while now but it all fell apart when one of my teammates asked me Him:"Dude,how did you know she was The One?" Me: "There no such thing as the one, you just find a way to love somebody with everything you have" and i started practising again..He doesn't know so he is not hating or trying to make me feel bad and i didn't say anything about the situation i am into..i just..all the way home i couldn't stop thinking about her and how i want to be with her..feels like all the progress I make falls apart because of the fact that i meet her at school and believe me i feel so lonely when there is no one to call or to wait for me after my practise with a chocolate bar and a smile telling me how sexy i looked and kissed me...god damn it..she is so cute... Oh, by the way, her friends came by the school and she ignored them for me which i found really strange cause what i know is that a person does not change who he is so easily so i saw through that but it feels stupid...the fear of letting go..the fear of actually wanting to grab it back..she shows me so much attention now....She made listen to a amazing songs, and all i did was smile because i knew not how to react...I don't know what I feel right now..I just want her back but it feels that even if i get her back the old stupid things will occur again...and believe me i know we loved each other so sincerely... All i want is to cry in her arms right now..but i am stuck alone in my house..trying to study as my head drifts in her direction... Link to post Share on other sites
xUnknown Posted February 5, 2014 Share Posted February 5, 2014 ..She made listen to a amazing songs, and all i did was smile because i knew not how to react Are you still talking to her??? Seeing her in class is one thing. Talking to her is a completely different thing. You're digging your own grave man. You're the cause of all your pain. She's doing this to you because you let her. You're hurting yourself here. You need to cut it off, or give her an ultimatum. Look her square in the eyes (kiss her if you really want to like I said earlier), then ask her if she wants to be with you. If she says, I don't know, tell her to stop ****ing with you and to stop talking to you so YOU can move on. I feel like its the same cycle, you talk to her in class, and you set yourself back. You need to break that. And if you can't break it buy going cold turkey, give her the ultimatum so that she can do it in part as well to help you out. Right now she knows youre still on the hook. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Discover Posted February 5, 2014 Author Share Posted February 5, 2014 Are you still talking to her??? Seeing her in class is one thing. Talking to her is a completely different thing. You're digging your own grave man. You're the cause of all your pain. She's doing this to you because you let her. You're hurting yourself here. You need to cut it off, or give her an ultimatum. Look her square in the eyes (kiss her if you really want to like I said earlier), then ask her if she wants to be with you. If she says, I don't know, tell her to stop ****ing with you and to stop talking to you so YOU can move on. I feel like its the same cycle, you talk to her in class, and you set yourself back. You need to break that. And if you can't break it buy going cold turkey, give her the ultimatum so that she can do it in part as well to help you out. Right now she knows youre still on the hook. I just don't want to be a complete dush and besides I don't think I am able to face her after I do this..:S I am thinking of it more these days, I want to do it..just not enough guts.. Link to post Share on other sites
xUnknown Posted February 5, 2014 Share Posted February 5, 2014 I just don't want to be a complete dush and besides I don't think I am able to face her after I do this..:S I am thinking of it more these days, I want to do it..just not enough guts.. You HAVE to be a "complete douche". But the kicker here is -- YOU'RE NOT being a complete douche. You're healing. You're moving on. You're trying to fix you're broken heart the only way that is possible. You must NOT TALK TO HER. You're doing this to yourself man. You have to CUT HER OFF. Pretend she is just another random person you pass in the halls. You don't talk or speak to her, acknowledge her, say "hi", wave, listen to songs (I still can't believe you did that..)...NOTHING. She didn't make you listen to the songs, YOU made you listen to the songs. You did it to yourself. She knows the type of hold she has on you. You're releiving her guilt by being there for her...you're trying to be a friend when everyone here on LS knows you (anyone after a romantic relationship) can't. Seriously man, you're like a mosquito. You see the blue light from the bug zapper, and you keep going towards it. You keep getting zapped and back off...but you can't get that glowing light out of your head because you keep looking at it, which makes you go back to get zapped again. I don't know what else to tell you, and I'm sure anyone here will agree. You have to go NO CONTACT. That means NOTHING. Sure, you have her in class. But you have to pretend you don't see her. If you're FORCED to work together on an in-class assignment, fine - there is nothing you can do about that. But other than that...YOU DON"T EXIST TO HER. All you're doing is making her feel better. She probably sees how clingy you're being and thinks she made the right decision. Have you thought about that? She knows she still has a grip on you. BREAK FREE. Heal yourself. I brought up the idea about the ultimatum/kiss because of this: If you can't do this out of the blue --going cold turkey on it, going NC....That last ditch Yes/No would do justice and force you to. What happens if you do this and she said "No"...we'll now you know and you don't have to guess anymore about what her intentions are...it seems like she doesn't know what she wants, but if she said she doesn't want to be with you AGAIN, will that help you understand that NC is the way to go? I don't try to attack you or criticize you man..I'm trying to help you. You're doing no good at all for yourself by still being friendly. You need to heal yourself. You need to go no contact for you. You may feel like you're being a douche...but you're not. She may think that...but she'll understand. Hell, she probably wonders why you haven't done it yet (again, which is only helping her move on faster knowing you're still there). No Contact. There is no other way. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 I just don't want to be a complete dush and besides I don't think I am able to face her after I do this..:S I am thinking of it more these days, I want to do it..just not enough guts.. Omg Dude !!!! just do it already, cut the cord. How long do you want to suffer? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 You HAVE to be a "complete douche". But the kicker here is -- YOU'RE NOT being a complete douche. You're healing. You're moving on. You're trying to fix you're broken heart the only way that is possible. You must NOT TALK TO HER. You're doing this to yourself man. You have to CUT HER OFF. Pretend she is just another random person you pass in the halls. You don't talk or speak to her, acknowledge her, say "hi", wave, listen to songs (I still can't believe you did that..)...NOTHING. She didn't make you listen to the songs, YOU made you listen to the songs. You did it to yourself. She knows the type of hold she has on you. You're releiving her guilt by being there for her...you're trying to be a friend when everyone here on LS knows you (anyone after a romantic relationship) can't. Seriously man, you're like a mosquito. You see the blue light from the bug zapper, and you keep going towards it. You keep getting zapped and back off...but you can't get that glowing light out of your head because you keep looking at it, which makes you go back to get zapped again. I don't know what else to tell you, and I'm sure anyone here will agree. You have to go NO CONTACT. That means NOTHING. Sure, you have her in class. But you have to pretend you don't see her. If you're FORCED to work together on an in-class assignment, fine - there is nothing you can do about that. But other than that...YOU DON"T EXIST TO HER. All you're doing is making her feel better. She probably sees how clingy you're being and thinks she made the right decision. Have you thought about that? She knows she still has a grip on you. BREAK FREE. Heal yourself. I brought up the idea about the ultimatum/kiss because of this: If you can't do this out of the blue --going cold turkey on it, going NC....That last ditch Yes/No would do justice and force you to. What happens if you do this and she said "No"...we'll now you know and you don't have to guess anymore about what her intentions are...it seems like she doesn't know what she wants, but if she said she doesn't want to be with you AGAIN, will that help you understand that NC is the way to go? I don't try to attack you or criticize you man..I'm trying to help you. You're doing no good at all for yourself by still being friendly. You need to heal yourself. You need to go no contact for you. You may feel like you're being a douche...but you're not. She may think that...but she'll understand. Hell, she probably wonders why you haven't done it yet (again, which is only helping her move on faster knowing you're still there). No Contact. There is no other way. This! Just keep reading it over and over. Take it from me Discover Nc is less painful than seeing them. Hell, Ifeel better going Nc. I know its hard but its for YOU! Spare yourself all this pain and suffering listen to what xUnknown is saying! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Discover if you won't listten to me atleast listen to Bubblesbursted, she knows what is in your best interest 2 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Discover if you won't listten to me atleast listen to Bubblesbursted, she knows what is in your best interest :lmao: He needs to listen to everyone here. Seriously, everyone is asking him to go Nc or Lc atleast. Im sure you and xUnknown , infact everyone trying to help him wants the best for him Discover, everyone here is trying to help you so that YOU dont suffer! Stop putting yourself in so much pain. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Discover Posted February 6, 2014 Author Share Posted February 6, 2014 Well, I finally "cut the cord" and I feel amazingly bad and I can't stop crying but I am relieved and no where near wondering anymore..I just..I just can't stio thinking of the beautiful moments I had with her..god i am crying so much right now...I want her so much.. I have only you now guys...I am..alone once again...crap..I can't stop crying...it hurts so much i can even physically feel it..I hate it.. Her actions,like you all guys guessed were because she wanted me as a friend and "I still need you"..so NC ha?...God...The good thing is that today she was acting like her usual self and for first time in a long time annoyed me so much that i couldn't help myself but follow what xUnknow told me to do... Thank you for being here for me xUknown,Bubbles,David87...Don't worry xUnknown I know all you said in fact all of you said was in order for me to feel better and showed me the way...Just the tought of those two years gone like nothing makes me want to puke.. I need somebody.. I am in so much pain right now... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Stay strong buddy you are not alone. Unfortunately we all have to go through this kind of things in order to become stronger and make better decisions in the future. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Well, I finally "cut the cord" and I feel amazingly bad and I can't stop crying but I am relieved and no where near wondering anymore..I just..I just can't stio thinking of the beautiful moments I had with her..god i am crying so much right now...I want her so much.. I have only you now guys...I am..alone once again...crap..I can't stop crying...it hurts so much i can even physically feel it..I hate it.. Her actions,like you all guys guessed were because she wanted me as a friend and "I still need you"..so NC ha?...God...The good thing is that today she was acting like her usual self and for first time in a long time annoyed me so much that i couldn't help myself but follow what xUnknow told me to do... Thank you for being here for me xUknown,Bubbles,David87...Don't worry xUnknown I know all you said in fact all of you said was in order for me to feel better and showed me the way...Just the tought of those two years gone like nothing makes me want to puke.. I need somebody.. I am in so much pain right now... It gets better. I promise Discover. You are not alone. We all are here for you! Come here , vent if you need to but stay strong on NC. Cry, its okay to cry. You will feel better. Dont think about good times. I know easier said than done , but whenever your mind goes to the good times think about all the bad things she did. Get mad , get upset. Its okay. We are here for you. Link to post Share on other sites
xUnknown Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Yeah man, it takes time...but it gets better. Just stay focused on you and fill your time with old or new hobbies. Those two years didn't mean nothing...we all know that. If it did had meant nothing, it wouldn't have lasted 2 years. These things happen. You just have to pick yourself up. Bad things happen, but how you respond to them defines your character. Keep going NC. It will be tough. Anytime you feel like breaking NC, post here. If she texts you, post it here. We'll tell you what do to (even though 99% of the time it won't warrant a response), but it will help you through it and get rid of any doubting you may have. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Discover Posted February 6, 2014 Author Share Posted February 6, 2014 (edited) Yeah man, it takes time...but it gets better. Just stay focused on you and fill your time with old or new hobbies. Those two years didn't mean nothing...we all know that. If it did had meant nothing, it wouldn't have lasted 2 years. These things happen. You just have to pick yourself up. Bad things happen, but how you respond to them defines your character. Keep going NC. It will be tough. Anytime you feel like breaking NC, post here. If she texts you, post it here. We'll tell you what do to (even though 99% of the time it won't warrant a response), but it will help you through it and get rid of any doubting you may have. Oh God guys thank you so much...I am such a mess right now..falling apart..barely seeing what i write from my tears..god damn it...it hurts so deep... Everyone is telling me how perfect I am and that's hurting me..all my life i have been hearing that but in th end she left..didn't she?..perfect..perfect for who>? for myself?...i hate how everyone seems so admiring at me but nobody knows what kind of a mess i am ... THose two years...for the first time in my life i felt happy...and now she is gone..people tell me i am so deep in toughts and feelings...that i am born to be romantic..i hate this..it hurts so much .......all this time..all my life i have never been happy...she made me happy and now it is the same again...the funny thing is that even with her i didn't feel 100% happy all the time.every thing we did together...everything..now it is nothing..just a memory that will fade away.i am losing myself right now......now i am the same old sad boy who helps everyone else and looks happy but can't fix himself... I am falling apart... Edited February 6, 2014 by Discover 1 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Oh God guys thank you so much...I am such a mess right now..falling apart..barely seeing what i write from my tears..god damn it...it hurts so deep... Everyone is telling me how perfect I am and that's hurting me..all my life i have been hearing that but in th end she left..didn't she?..perfect..perfect for who>? for myself?...i hate how everyone seems so admiring at me but nobody knows what kind of a mess i am ... THose two years...for the first time in my life i felt happy...and now she is gone..people tell me i am so deep in toughts and feelings...that i am born to be romantic..i hate this..it hurts so much .......all this time..all my life i have never been happy...she made me happy and now it is the same again...the funny thing is that even with her i didn't feel 100% happy all the time.every thing we did together...everything..now it is nothing..just a memory that will fade away.i am losing myself right now......now i am the same old sad boy who helps everyone else and looks happy but can't fix himself... I am falling apart... Discover , listen there is nothing wrong with you. She left you. SHE , and its not your fault. Its HER loss not yours. She doesnt deserve your tears. You can make yourself happy. Listen to music, go out with your friends , have fun. Now is the time to do it. Do whatever you love. Find a new hobby, hell if possible get a job in a music shop or something. Crying is okay buddy. Take it out. Its fine. You will feel better. You arent a sad old boy. You are an amazing person yea? And for who you ask? You are amazing because its YOU , your life. Trust me, one day the girl who really appreciates you will come. Then it will all make sense. Till then just keep holding on! We are here. You are doing the right thing by going NC. You are doing the right thing trust me! For you, you will heal as far as I have seen. People get over their LTR exes , I am doing it so can you! I have faith in you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Discover Posted February 6, 2014 Author Share Posted February 6, 2014 O..Bubbles..it hurts so much...it hurts so muuch,,,,,i can';t even look myself in the mirror and try to stop so my father doesn't see me like this when he gets home and tell my mother..i just...aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...hurts....i feel so alone... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
bubblesbursted Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 O..Bubbles..it hurts so much...it hurts so muuch,,,,,i can';t even look myself in the mirror and try to stop so my father doesn't see me like this when he gets home and tell my mother..i just...aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...hurts....i feel so alone... I wish I could be of more help to you Please calm down. Take deep breathes. Turn on the music (your fave band) and try to calm down first please. Link to post Share on other sites
RDawg Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Geez and I thought I was having a bad day. Discover.. buddy, dude.. brother.. I don't know what to say other than I feel for you. I really do man. Just know that there are thousands of people all over the world going through exactly what you are now, feeling the exact same emotions. I know, I am one of them. It's life man, it's part of growing up and geez.. it just is. Life is a challange. Don't you have a guy friend you can meet up with and go for a drink? (Sorry that's probably terrible advice but that's what I'm about to do.) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Discover Posted February 6, 2014 Author Share Posted February 6, 2014 I just...you are of help..i just..hurt so mich...sooo freaking much...my head started to hurt from crying...I have..he is going/went trought the same...unlike me he was with his ex for 3 years...we are kind of there for each other ..i just can't stop crying...and...i don't know...aaaaaaaaaaaaaa 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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