How to deal with my overly dramatic parents?

[starzarebrite37]

My parents are always the type of people who take something very minor, and blow it out of proportion. For example, one time, my mom was sick with a cold. My father went on a trip for a couple of weeks, but she wouldn't let me stay with her and take care of her. She was well enough to talk on the phone, mind you. Now, she goes around telling people that because I or no one else was there, that she almost died. I am sorry, but someone who is able to die, is not well enough to talk on the phone.

 

Also, when they came to visit me, before we went out to eat, they made a huge deal out of locking the windows before leaving their dogs because they were afraid that someone would steal the dogs through the window. We live in a very safe neighborhood, mind you. They also would not leave their dogs alone, and they had them out in the car while we were eating. Then they whined about how they were afraid that someone would steal them. They also have to unplug stuff in the house because they are afraid that the house will catch on fire. I swear, mindless things like that.

 

I am unsure if it is their age, or they have something wrong with them, but I am getting sick of it. I am not sure how to deal other than ignore them. I needed to vent, so thanks for baring with me.

[d0nnivain]

Is it possible your parents are mentally ill? Could they possibly be starved for attention?

 

 

If you think they are otherwise safe but just being dramatic, walk away. I did. I made a decision in my 20s that my mom didn't like. She ran around telling people I died. We didn't have any interactions for over a year . . . I even missed the holidays with my extended family.

 

 

After a while another family member intervened & we learned to respect each other as adults.

[starzarebrite37]

I am unsure if they are really mentally ill, or just doing it for attention, or both. I have tried ignoring them. I really think that as they get older, they are getting increasingly more paranoid. They were calling for snow here last night, and my parents acted like it was going to be blizzard. But it was only 4 inches! LOL

[d0nnivain]

As you get older your relationship with snow changes. In part because when you are younger if you fall you scramble up thinking gosh, I hope nobody saw me; that was embarrassing. When you are older you think, crap I hope I didn't break anything.

 

 

Drift away a bit & see if that helps. Learn to hold your tongue & let their rants slide off your back. You don't have to participate in every argument you are invited to.

[Tayla]

WOW! Your parents and I have much in common. So Let me share their side. Health is important as you age. Security is equally important, be it belongs or things they cherish. I have more empathy for folks once I walked the path or saw how others endured. No Matter how "secure" you perceive their neighborhood or their "health" matters , to them they carry a different value. Just as they seemingly blow things out of proportion in your eyes, perhaps you can be equally accountable for not taking their concerns sincerely. I lock my car, my house, unplug things ...reason being...I am responsible and my insurance company appreciates it from a theft and fire stand point.

 

As to the overdramatic statement on death....that part seems out of sorts for her to say to folks.

[AmberWalander]

Calm down and just listen. My Dad's like that too. Talk to them and help them understand. Sometimes the habit is just too ingrained by experience that they find it difficult not to be overly dramatic.

[pink_sugar]

My dad is sort of like that. He complains and nags every single chance he gets and it doesn't take much for him to get upset with you. It's difficult and you have to keep reminding yourself that it's them and not you. I grew up with little self esteem, because my dad always made it look like I had the problem, when it was the way he treated me that caused me to act the way I did with him. Once I move, I will have him in my life minimally, because at almost 25 years old, he still treats me like I'm 12 and the lack of respect is obvious. Your parents seem neurotic more than anything.

[bubbaganoosh]

I can understand both sides of this. I don't know how old your parents are but when you get older, two things happen.

 

First is you become creatures of habit. They have ways of doing things and have been doing it for a long time and their too far in their ways to change.

 

Second thing is when you get older, you become less secure then you were when they were younger.

 

I'm like that. I'm 66, retired and in poor health (emphysema) and I now get up at the same time and have a daily routine that I keep no matter what. First cup of coffee in the morning and after that the second cup and read the paper and so on and so forth, but it's the same thing. I'm used to it and have no reason to change.

 

I also live with my best friend and his fiance. I'm chief bottle washer and cook. (and damn good at it too) We live in a real safe area and the neighbors around are always willing to give a helping hand but when my buddy and his fiance go away for the weekend, I make sure that at night, the house is buttoned up and all doors are locked only because with my health and breathing problems, there isn't much I can do to defend myself in case of a break in except to choke the burglar with my 02 hose and that doesn't make me feel real secure.

 

I was never like that. In my younger days I never backed down from anything or anyone and if need be, hell on wheels but now I'm old and not in good condition and that's what happens when age creeps up on you and remember, you too will get old someday so have a bit of patience with them. it's not mental health. It's insecurity.