Do You Work Out For Yourself Or For Them?

[Andy_K]

This is not so straightforward a question for me to answer

 

Originally it was purely to look better and get girls, since I had no success at all as a teenager. I think what first triggered it was overhearing a girl I had a crush on telling her friend how hot some guys abs were. That was about 14 years ago.

 

I am not sure when exactly, but at some point things changed. If I was with an otherwise perfect match right now and she said 'I'd like you to lose the abs, get some more weight around the belly as I prefer it' or something similar, then I would refuse. But I still love it when a girl appreciates the way I look. Although I've notice that my arms getting bigger makes MUCH more difference to my popularity than getting cut.

 

So, yes I do it for myself. But I also both do and don't do it for them

[Robert Z]

Did you quote the wrong post? I said to massively change your body shape, you had to have an obsession with it. You can't change your bone structure, and overall body shape very much. Skinny ass dudes don't become like Arnie with a 45 minute a day session.

 

 

I guess I missed the word "massively".

 

I never said they were stupid, I said they had the personality of a stamp. I'm speaking from my limited interactions with serious lifters.

Either way, there is no cause and effect here. You make it sound as if there is.

 

]I'm sure you won't argue that an educated/cultured man will get more quality women, than some over-roided meathead.

Strength and education are not mutually exclusive. In fact, I believe Mr. Castle is an engineering student. [maybe wrong]. I am a physicist highly dedicated to being ripped. So you will understand that your comments seem fantastically lame to me.

 

 

You say it's possible with just 45 minutes a day, but they probably mean 45 mins of lifting action. It's doesn't account for travel, showers, sitting with fellow lifters chewing the fat for an hour, about how heavy a piece of metal they can lift.

 

Keeping fit is supposed to be enjoyable. That's why we invented sports. You can't replace the adrenaline rush from scoring a goal/touchdown, with looking in the mirror, flexing your biceps. I worry about the psyche of people who do this religiously.

 

 

 

Well now that is an interesting direction to go. But the fact is that controlled lifts and other routines are far safer than sports. Sports lead to injuries which prevent a person from doing anything. For younger people this isn't a problem. But even by the time a person is into their late twenties or early thirties, this becomes highly relevant.

 

By the time I was 21, I had a bad back and bad knees thanks to sports. Weight lifting can be very safe and has helped me to recover from all of my sports injuries.

[Emilia]

For me it started off work related. Started strength training because I was going to join the police. I had done various types of exercise in the past and had a gym membership 15 years ago but was pretty clueless about building strength. I didn't even think or worry about building muscle.

 

Then I just got into it, boxing, lifting, strength training. I like the way those sports make me look. I like my ass, shoulders and small waist. My build isn't every guy's cup of tea but as I learned to appreciate the amount of discipline and work it takes to be good at something, I learned to appreciate men who have the same mindset as mine and the feeling seems to be mutual. It's not about being into their abs or whatever, it's more that they get off their ass and do something. And they like the same thing about me. I don't even like running but can't imagine not being able to have my 5km once a week.

 

So it's a mixture of attitude and looks.

[melell]

Well Castle, from the pictures you have sent me I would say you have a really nice face, not quite James dean, but nice to look at.

 

I am more of a face person, smile especially-if I like it, that is enough for me.

 

I don't work out much, but try to stay really active with outdoorsy things. I am not sure if my body is desirable or not, I am pretty skinny too- and I know lots of guys prefer a bit of definition, either way I don't think it is worth doing anything unless it is for oneself.

 

The person of my dreams could be partial to nicely rounded 6 foot blondes- doesn't really bear thinking about.

[radiodarcy]

A little bit of both for me. I do feel better - - mood wise - - afterwards. But as much as I would like to say I don't do it for others I do. Because I used to weigh 172 pounds (I'm just under five feet), didn't exercise at all and ate horribly.

 

I remember all too well the looks I got from other people and how their reactions affected me. I don't necessarily enjoyed being "checked out". But I also don't miss being completely ignored or getting the "I'm glad I don't look (or my gf/wife doesn't look) like her" looks either :/

[lucy_in_disguise]

I have more than enough motivation to do it "for me"- stress relief, anger management, health, strength/ endurance, good company. I love working out, I think it's fun and I love the way it makes me feel- physically and especially mentally.

 

That said, even if I didn't experience the benefits above, I would still do it to look hot.

[somedude81]

I just went to the gym, for the first time in three months.

 

The girls better start noticing me!

[Chocolat]

I do it for me. I love being strong, love seeing muscles, love making/exceeding goals.

 

Working out makes me happy.

[dichotomy]

You know you might have been doing it a bit "too much for yourself" - when you have troubles trying to shave your face after a good session of lifting.:p

[austyre]

lol I workout because I am the only who can run sub 5 minute miles and no one else can do that for me I don't exerciser for other people but IF so one can run it for me and I reap the benefits of good health then yep >but ain't gonna happen:)

[Eternal Sunshine]

You know you might have been doing it a bit "too much for yourself" - when you have troubles trying to shave your face after a good session of lifting.:p

 

Yeap. I started working out to be more attractive but now I am addicted. I started doing boxing now. It's great when I am pissed off

[Grumpybutfun]

Yeap. I started working out to be more attractive but now I am addicted. I started doing boxing now. It's great when I am pissed off

 

Isn't boxing great for stress or anger? How is your foot work? Don't forget that as it is so good for toned legs.

G

[Ninjainpajamas]

Well...if you want to stay "competitive" on the "market" you've got to keep yourself together, that includes your body. The better you look, the more sex appeal you may have.

 

You can't work out your face, but you can change your overall appearance with style and physique, a good build shows even through clothes...they also fit a lot better and kind of the way they are supposed to fit.

 

Before I started working out, I was like this guy...

 

Became this guy

 

Grew to about this guy

 

Then started working, eating out, having serious relationships aka getting fat and fell off to mostly around this guy right now, but definitely fluctuated in weight...you lose sight of what you look like sometimes, I definitely was caught off guard with how much I had gained at one point...but I've suffered some pretty significant injuries that kept me off my feet for quite some time, that definitely contributed to the sudden increase in weight gain.

 

So for me, I see rehabilitation to an extent as part of my "getting back on the wagon"...because I'm always recovering from some kind of surgery/injury every 3 to 4 years or so.

 

I never really did it for the looks or appearance but myself...I loved swimming in the pool or at the beach, playing paintball, playing basketball, played sports in highschool and some college (some of my best memories in life)...always enjoyed working out, achieving results...not visually but more so strength wise, I liked seeing how much stronger I was getting and feeling...that was the real drive for me...I was taken back when people started reacting towards my body.

 

I grew up in California, mostly in sunny weather and being outside. I preferred for the most part having my shirt off and feeling the sun on my back/chest, plus I'd always go for a dip in the pool so I just grew up used to it, I just didn't really like wearing a shirt especially during the summer heat...but that's around the time I started getting a lot of attention just for how my body looked as my physique became a young mans and then more into a manly physique (while working out playing sports and such)...seemed like a "weird" concept as a teenager and growing up for something that seemed so regular and natural....sexy dirty looks/stares, innuendos/comments, strangers girls/women would ask to see/touch my stomach or arms, If I did have my shirt on I'd get asked if I could take my shirt off...it was weird, it really didn't make sense to me...it quickly became apparent to me that this was something that people see as "value" but it still wasn't clicking as to what it meant and why people were reacting that way towards it, it was a bit of disbelief..when I looked in the mirror I still saw that skinny kid who people use to call skin and bones...but as a result men might be more aggressive or feel intimidated by your physique and stature, they might treat you differently...women might give you more attention making other men upset or jealous, if women were in a group they were like a bunch of gobbling hens...you couldn't help but notice the difference in the way people reacted towards you...it just felt like something was different or wrong with you but you didn't know what or why, there would just be a sudden silence or shift in mood.

 

I haven't been in that kind of shape though in a very long time and I'm not as youthful good-looking like that young teen/twenty-something anymore, I still workout to try and maintain body weight usually associated with rehabilitation which kicks off an intense barrage of getting back to a moderate physique, but I've spent a lot of years in the gym and it's not that exciting anymore, off and on since I was 15...I don't know how much it would or wouldn't change things If I were to get back into that kind of shape again...I'm sure it would have an impact, I still get comments on my physique/physical attributes and of course height..but it was never that "significant" in my eyes, to me as a man...but maybe that's just a bit naive, maybe If I was very short, didn't have a good physique the attention would have been different, maybe not even talking to the same women at all...it's hard to say and gauge for yourself when you've just been looking at things from your perspective, which like most people is not necessarily your strengths but noticing your weaknesses/flaws...that's what's on your mind, not how "good" you might look for the most part.

 

Either way, my motivation will always be for good health and I'd be perfectly fine just being toned and lean and not necessarily very muscular again, I don't really need the muscle anymore like I used to but I'll always some naturally...in fact I've known women who just like skinny guys, that was their thing...for me, I'd never want to be that skinny as they would like, personally I'd honestly feel emasculated being too skinny and I'm about 6'1 205 pounds as of now and I don't know how much more I could lose before people start calling me too skinny even though I could probably squeeze out another 10 or even 15 pounds, I just really need to tone up...but it just depends how I look, feel and what I can realistically maintain.

 

I'm not even a big eater, junk food, candy or soda or any of that...I always see the motivation coming from myself though, that's what drove me to my peak in the first place and if anything will get me back...but with that being said, because more aware and knowing what I do now in terms of attraction, I think it's pretty hard to deny that a good body will help you along, especially in the dating world...I always want to keep myself on the more "sexy" side instead of just flabby and letting myself go and I'd want to same thing from a long-term partner, not out of judgment but out of compatibility.

[Els]

Partly for both, and mostly for health reasons.

 

I don't think you need to build muscle to be healthy or even do a traditional 'gym workout'. I don't even think you necessarily need a lot of muscle to get girls (probably depending on which girls you want/meet). But a completely sedentary lifestyle is still unhealthy even if you're skinny and not overweight, which is a point worth considering.

[Shepp]

I work out for me in the sense that I like my body to be the fittest it can be but mostly I work out because I love it.

I enjoy most forms of exercising and the things I don't enjoy particularly I do to improve my performance, in sport and work - make me fastest, stronger, whatever.

I guess...for me it probably comes from a competitive nature, I wanted to be the best at sport so I worked out...to win.

 

Now I guess I'm just hooked - I get angsty if I cant exercise.

 

I don't find weights fun though, I enjoy cardio much more, so that's how I spend most of my time.

 

 

Personally I think your best look comes naturally and you should roll with that providing your healthy - I'm 5"11 and I kind of sit at 185lbs, 14% fat, the figures never move and i'm not fussed moving them because figures are really just for other people, you know how you want your own body to be.

 

Like I work out a lot but I could never get skinny - my shoulders are broad, ever since I was a kid I had to go a size up in shirts because of my shoulders, so you just roll with what you've got. I'd look disproportioned if I got too skinny.

[Els]

 

Personally I think your best look comes naturally and you should roll with that providing your healthy - I'm 5"11 and I kind of sit at 185lbs, 14% fat, the figures never move and i'm not fussed moving them because figures are really just for other people, you know how you want your own body to be.

 

Like I work out a lot but I could never get skinny - my shoulders are broad, ever since I was a kid I had to go a size up in shirts because of my shoulders, so you just roll with what you've got. I'd look disproportioned if I got too skinny.

 

I know you said that figures don't really matter (and they don't, within reason! ), but 14% fat is bordering between 'athlete' and 'fitness' for men, anyway, so you certainly have a 'figure' to be proud of.

 

Pun intended.

[Phoe]

I work out about 90% for me and about 10% for "others".

 

I enjoy working out. I find it fun. I also like being strong, I find it very necessary in work and life to be physically strong and capable. Also, when I'm working out and eating right, I feel good. When I get off track for a few weeks I start to feel sickly.

 

 

The 10% that is for others is basically just a matter of trying to look nice in general. I know most men aren't fussed about whether a girl works out, and I have had men in the past actually tell me to STOP working out. I know that no matter my body type, I still won't be everyone's cup of tea, so why do it for others? There's always gonna be people who won't like it, so I just do it because it makes me happy.

 

 

I doubt my boyfriend would care in the slightest if I stopped working out. I know he doesn't want me to lose weight and have my boobs shrink, and he likes a big butt, so my hunch is that he'd prefer me with a few extra pounds anyway, which he's not gonna get, lol. I'm a gym rat. I've got butt and boobs but I'm mostly athletic and toned. He just has to deal with it.

[Eau Claire]

I've worked out since high school...40 years ago. Have always enjoyed it.

 

Can't imagine not being as fit as I can be AND looking and feeling good for my man.

 

Have never gone more than two weeks without working out and those two weeks were just before and after childbirth.

[Shepp]

I know you said that figures don't really matter (and they don't, within reason! ), but 14% fat is bordering between 'athlete' and 'fitness' for men, anyway, so you certainly have a 'figure' to be proud of.

 

Pun intended.

 

Pun noted

 

Haha, right but, i get the benefit of not having a standard 9-5, i can hit the gym on work time, which makes a big difference. Plus i play semi-pro sport so 'athlete' fitness is kind of where I need to be

[theothersully]

I'll admit it. 100% work out to have some clout with women. ha ha ha

 

Otherwise, I'd just stay physically active, with my also slim natural body, But no.... i add bulk in to be more attractive.

[potsticker]

I mostly do it for me. The extra attention I get I suppose is nice sometimes, but I do generally prefer the tranquility of blending into the crowd like I did when I was chubbier: my personality's loud enough as it is in person ;p . When you're not wheezing your way through your day and you always have energy to spare, you can enjoy yourself a lot more in everything you do.

[Tayken]

Am not going to generalize.....but I am hard pressed to actually believe that most of the women that go to the gym, actually go to work out a sweat, as opposed to checking out the competition, showing off their lulu lemon and just seeking attention from the guys

 

These are the same females that only go running outside when it's sunny and they can wear less, as opposed to when it's cold and you need layers which doesn't seem to bother the real running women

[potsticker]

Am not going to generalize.....but I am hard pressed to actually believe that most of the women that go to the gym, actually go to work out a sweat, as opposed to checking out the competition, showing off their lulu lemon and just seeking attention from the guys

 

These are the same females that only go running outside when it's sunny and they can wear less, as opposed to when it's cold and you need layers which doesn't seem to bother the real running women

 

 

How many have you actually met? A vast majority of the ones I've talked to and gotten to know are quite serious in their dedication to actually "working out". Some of their trainers practically kill them every session and yet they come back for more, to push their limits.

 

Not to mention that I've seen plenty of women running around the neighborhood at night (in a brightly lit city that's still relatively empty at night). And this is like, past midnight, hell, even early morning like 5 am. yknow, when there's NO ONE AROUND.

[Tayken]

How many have you actually met? A vast majority of the ones I've talked to and gotten to know are quite serious in their dedication to actually "working out". Some of their trainers practically kill them every session and yet they come back for more, to push their limits.

 

Not to mention that I've seen plenty of women running around the neighborhood at night (in a brightly lit city that's still relatively empty at night). And this is like, past midnight, hell, even early morning like 5 am. yknow, when there's NO ONE AROUND.

 

 

A lot actually...am a marathon runner, and as for your night running comment, it gets darker before 5am these days round here

 

That being said, women that run are damn sexy.....yummy

[Eau Claire]

A lot actually...am a marathon runner, and as for your night running comment, it gets darker before 5am these days round here

 

That being said, women that run are damn sexy.....yummy

 

When my boyfriend and I go for a run together, he likes to pinch my bum. Says he can't help it when my pony tail is swaying back and forth. Then this gets us laughing and I lose my breathing pattern. Then he threatens to pinch me again if I don't pick up the pace. Then I start laughing even more.

 

Before we go for a run I make him promise not to get me laughing but he always does.