Leeladams72 Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 If you remember any of the threads I posted. I briefly dated a co-worker. We both liked each other but I started playing games and soon after he played them too. It went on for a while and I suspect we both were using each other for ego boosts. But we were also friends. I cut him off twice. Telling him we could no longer be friends etc, etc. prior to cutting him off the second thing he had started to become critical of me and I got the feeling that at times he might have even been irritated by our game playing interaction. He was moving to a different department 15 minutes away from me and we would not see each other again for the most part. So on his last day I told him that we could no longer talk. I did tell him I had feelings for him as well. At first it seemed like he was attempting to talk me out if it. And he was still contacting me, popping up at my building to see me, responding to my texts. I still kept my distance and would only contact him once a week or so. The last time I texted him it had been s week since he sent me a message and I had simply asked him for the names of places I could go to network. He gave me the names. We made small chat, things seemed okay. Since then he has ignored me and blocked me on instant message. Rejected my friend request on linked in, etc. I'm just unsure of why he has randomly just become so cold toward me. Should I just assume that we are no longer friends and that I did something to offend him, or is he done with me because I no longer provide the ego boost? I still would like to be casual friends which is why I kept minimal contact but him completely ignoring me is really weird and seems unlike him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Leeladams72 Posted January 30, 2014 Author Share Posted January 30, 2014 I guess I wouldn't be so weirded out if this was like him but I know him enough to know that when he is ignoring someone it is because he is upset with that person. So since I have barely contacted him and I haven't done anything beyond asking him networking information or wishing him luck with his new position I'm really perplexed about why he would suddenly ignore me or ignore my friend request on linked in. I don't know if its worth it to even confront him but I honestly have never had someone do this to me before ever, and it's really strange honestly. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyTeran Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 Maybe he's worried that you will cause upset (drama)? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Leeladams72 Posted January 30, 2014 Author Share Posted January 30, 2014 The last couple of times I talked to him it's been very professional and no drama or games. Me just wishing him luck on his new job and inquiring about networking. In the most recent convo the only thing I can think of that was off was that I mentioned I got a make over done to look more soft and feminine to get a better job and he was what? why? then he said"oh my God. And sent me one text after that and then after that, that's when he started ignoring me. Keep in mind I had told him a month ago when we were still working together that I was getting a makeover and he acted weird about it but not super weird. He just asked why I was. The next day is when I told him I wouldn't really be talking to him anymore like I used to, etc. and that's when it seemed like he was trying to continue our friendship and was very receptive. He did make a statement though through text that was really random basically, "you drive me nuts and I shake my head at the things you do but I wouldn't want you to ever change who you are" And I told him he didnt have to worry that I wouldn't... And communication continued, though minimal until that last convo about the networking and makeover. After that convo he has basically ignored me completely... Or been very short the one time I did send him a question via instant messenger. It's just weird. He's not one to ignore someone out of nowhere. I even sent him a good luck email a few days ago because he was taking a licensing exam. He did not respond though I know he got it. Because this has never happened to me, especially with a guy or guy friend I'm genuinely confused. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Leeladams72 Posted January 30, 2014 Author Share Posted January 30, 2014 I'm taking the hint though and don't plan to contact him anymore but he had just told me how much he was going to miss me a month ago and still remaining in contact with me as if he wanted to maintain the friendship and now nothing... I just don't get it lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Elias33 Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 You cut him off twice, he wasn't going to wait for a third time I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 Maybe he is trying out and has to be in the best shape for being a yo-yo. Seems like the experience he had certainly makes him qualified. He gets strung along and bounced up and down and broken up with,,,,,yup if he was on this forum most of us would encourage him to go NC. At best even as friends I sense he can find more stablity with others. Let him go so you may grow. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Leeladams72 Posted January 30, 2014 Author Share Posted January 30, 2014 I get that I did sort of do the yo-yo thing and I thought that maybe that was the reason too but then why two weeks after telling him we can't talk anymore did he still try to talk to me and get me to talk to him, basically why all the sudden the change of heart? Like I said I don't even contact him much in the last three weeks I've contacted him twice... And then sent him one email that was very professional. Other than that I have not really went against my word in that I gave out a lot of distance between us. And not accepting my linked in request? Really... It's just silly. Linked in is not like Facebook at all. Oh well. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 All this drama and effort, for what? You two played a stupid cat and mouse game, mind games, ignoring one another, cutting him out of your life a few times, him being cold to you..... This is NOT friendship at all, let alone a healthy one. Move on, forget him and focus on your real friends. He has every right to not want you on his LinkedIn, professional reasons or not. Link to post Share on other sites
Pinch Posted January 31, 2014 Share Posted January 31, 2014 Ever think he found Someone that doesn't play games.Social media blocking is a sign of a person that doesn't want you to see them.He may have a new fling and you send messages and commenting on post will just cause drama. Then again you could have just hurt him and he is a strong man.Out of respect for him self he broke contact. What ever it is, it is not playing hard to get.Take the hint find a new guy.trying playing less games, be honest to yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
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