Here's my anaylsis:

[unnamed]

A combination of a few things come to mind.

 

First, the 'relationship' you and this other male seem to have is on the basis of looking-good. I see, from what you've said, no emotional attachment. The fact is he may be "gorgeous", but what type of a person is he? Chances are he would not suit you.

 

Take it into consideration, also, that you married your husband in high school; there must have been something there, correct? You love him, yet you are not physically attracted to him. Here, I find a great flaw in you so-called "love":

 

In true, unconditional love which -should- be the part of the basis of a marriage, looks do not dissapear nor diminish. What am I talking about? I find it coicidental that I too will be marrying my 'high school sweetheart'. We are both 17, but we've learned a lot about love, and we are planning on getting married. Since we have been seeing each other, I have two significant statements I must share with you.

 

One, the two of us were at a dance. She was standing directly in front of me, and I grabbed her and started spinning. All I could focus on, and see clearly, was her face and her body, and the rest was a blur. I told her that this is what its like to be in love; you do not see other people, all you focus on is the person in front of you. There are no interruptions, no changes, nothing.

 

Two, that no matter how large she may become, if she put on 400 pounds, I would find her even more attractive, and I was not lying. When something changes in your partner, as in they are burned in a fire, no matter how severe the burns were and how less-attractive they might think they are, true love will always prevail. If you truly loved your husband, as you say you do, then you should not have a problem with him gaining weight. It is certainly not unreasonable to ask him to get into shape, but I realized one thing: it seems your looking for an attractive male because you have, in a sense, lost one. Am I right, or a little bit close?

 

I have but one suggestion for you. No, I am not married, and yes, I am only 17, but listen please.

 

Do not sacrifice your husband or your family. And as they say, "you don't know what you had until its gone." It stands a true statement, one which to definetely consider.

 

This other man may be extremely attractive, but he should be a mere obstacle in your marriage, and not another path. Work on your marriage, tell your husband your needs, and make it a priority to get him to tell you the same.

 

Remember one thing: Physical beauty fades with time, true love doesn't. Do not put your husband through immature LUST like this. Yes, its lust. Its not love. How can you love a man you hardly know? It is simply impossible. You are infatuated with his looks, and that is all.

 

If you wish, dive in, but I guarantee you'll be diving head-first into a very, very, SHALLOW pool.

 

Hope this helps you.

[bootheelbabe]

Well, for someone 17, you sure do have a good insight on matters of the heart. Thanks for your input.

 

I still don't know what I'm going to do, I have a lot of things to sort out. But, just know, I wouldn't throw my marriage away based on looks alone. There's more to it than that. I'm not that SHALLOW!

 

I wish you and your girlfriend all the luck in the world, I can remember a time when I felt like you do now. I'm sorry to say, sometimes things change.

 

A combination of a few things come to mind.

 

First, the 'relationship' you and this other male seem to have is on the basis of looking-good. I see, from what you've said, no emotional attachment. The fact is he may be "gorgeous", but what type of a person is he? Chances are he would not suit you. Take it into consideration, also, that you married your husband in high school; there must have been something there, correct? You love him, yet you are not physically attracted to him. Here, I find a great flaw in you so-called "love":

 

In true, unconditional love which -should- be the part of the basis of a marriage, looks do not dissapear nor diminish. What am I talking about? I find it coicidental that I too will be marrying my 'high school sweetheart'. We are both 17, but we've learned a lot about love, and we are planning on getting married. Since we have been seeing each other, I have two significant statements I must share with you. One, the two of us were at a dance. She was standing directly in front of me, and I grabbed her and started spinning. All I could focus on, and see clearly, was her face and her body, and the rest was a blur. I told her that this is what its like to be in love; you do not see other people, all you focus on is the person in front of you. There are no interruptions, no changes, nothing.

 

Two, that no matter how large she may become, if she put on 400 pounds, I would find her even more attractive, and I was not lying. When something changes in your partner, as in they are burned in a fire, no matter how severe the burns were and how less-attractive they might think they are, true love will always prevail. If you truly loved your husband, as you say you do, then you should not have a problem with him gaining weight. It is certainly not unreasonable to ask him to get into shape, but I realized one thing: it seems your looking for an attractive male because you have, in a sense, lost one. Am I right, or a little bit close? I have but one suggestion for you. No, I am not married, and yes, I am only 17, but listen please. Do not sacrifice your husband or your family. And as they say, "you don't know what you had until its gone." It stands a true statement, one which to definetely consider. This other man may be extremely attractive, but he should be a mere obstacle in your marriage, and not another path. Work on your marriage, tell your husband your needs, and make it a priority to get him to tell you the same. Remember one thing: Physical beauty fades with time, true love doesn't. Do not put your husband through immature LUST like this. Yes, its lust. Its not love. How can you love a man you hardly know? It is simply impossible. You are infatuated with his looks, and that is all.

 

If you wish, dive in, but I guarantee you'll be diving head-first into a very, very, SHALLOW pool. Hope this helps you.