msbettyb Posted January 15, 2005 Share Posted January 15, 2005 The crap hit the fan last week as you can see in my other post and now the mm I am seeing says he needs "time". Time to decide and sort out things I think he has a nerve. I feel like I'm left hanging while he avoids me because he knows I have questions about what his wife said,especially her telling me they have a 2 year old. I would think that he would of already have his story together if I found out but he did'nt. He is older than me and he seemed to always have it together but now that he is busted it's like he can't handle it. I told him that I deserve the truth, that I'm hurt and that we need to talk he agreed, and said give him a week. He never gave me one, when I needed time so I have talked to him here and there all week but he is not ready. I feel like he is making sure his w is okay after our talk, I did'nt admit to her that me and her h was lovers but now she has doubt. I guess I just don't know what to think, he doesn't want to end it with me, but how can he salvage it? How can you make such good love with a person, show and tell them you care, and when problems comeup you bail. It makes me wonder what is going thru his head and what does he think he going to say to straighten this out. Any tips? Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted January 16, 2005 Share Posted January 16, 2005 Originally posted by msbettyb How can you make such good love with a person, show and tell them you care, and when problems comeup you bail. It makes me wonder what is going thru his head and what does he think he going to say to straighten this out. Any tips? Thanks Good Question.. and I bet his Wife has the same thought.. I'm sorry for what you're going through here.. but honestly if you look at it from a different perspective in some ways wasn't he showing you the kind of person he is when he began an affair with you to begin with? Things maybe weren't so great in his marriage.. yet he continued to stay in it and I have no doubt made love to his wife, told her he loved and cared for her but when problems came up.. he bailed on the vow he took to forsake all others.. and although it sucks for you now that he is bailing again on you.. it isn't the first time he's shown who he is. I haven't read your other thread(s) regarding this.. but IMO what is going through his mind right now is "How am I going to save MY OWN a**" The only way someone really can leave you hanging is IF you allow it.. he is in trouble with his wife right now, and it's a place he never thought he would be in.. now he is trying to make things better for her and save his a**.. IMO the only way to "straighten this out" would be for him to be completely honest with his Wife and with you.. he either gets into the marriage and ends things with you completely OR he ends the marriage and you decide IF you want someone who may or may not bail on you AGAIN when things get to hard for him. Good Luck Link to post Share on other sites
songbird Posted January 17, 2005 Share Posted January 17, 2005 I too am one that is guilty of not reading your previous threads, are you saying that you are confused? not in those words, but you do have questions? Why do you have questions?, because it seems to me (by reading the one that I did read), you have the answers already. Look inside and think... the answers are there, you are just to afraid to come out with them. Stop using your heart which is full of emotion and use that gut instinct, ( that we are all blessed with). When we make decisions with our emotions we mess up every time. Use logic and think practical the out come will come in your favor. Songbird Link to post Share on other sites
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