would you date someone with tats/piercings if you have a more conservative demeanor?

[jefermelesyeux]

let's say you work in a corporate setting. your work attire has to consist of tucked-in button-downs, a tie, khakis, nice shoes, clean-cut face (no shaggy facial hair or noticeable piercings or tattoos). your colleagues are all suits and similarly conservative in appearance. because of this, your demeanor outside of work is the same as it within.

 

would you consider dating somebody who was pierced in multiple noticeable places and had ink? does that kind of thing matter to you despite your more conservative nature? do opposites really attract?

 

note: by 'pierced in multiple places' i mean maybe a lip ring, nose ring, some earrings. nothing too crazy. i myself have piercings and tattoos but i still think there are limits. just curious what you guys think. i was talking with a guy earlier today that i've known for a few years now, and asked why nothing ever came of us when we used to have an interest in each other. this was essentially his reasoning- that we are incredibly different in that i have a more alternative appearance and he is more straitlaced (though not excessively).

[Emilia]

It depends on how many tats/piercings and where. How much of it is a statement of some kind or whether it is a body art. The last guy I went out with had a great tattoo that he designed himself, nothing huge or distracting, just on his arm. I don't like sleeve tattoos though or anything that covers the torso too much. It takes away from the beauty of that person. When I'm in bed with someone I don't want to look at masses of ink, I'd like to see his skin.

 

Not big on piercings I have to say, mainly because often people have them around the mouth and that's the least hygenic thing I can imagine. Especially in the tongue, ewww. Imagine the food and bacteria that builds up. Kissing that... No thanks.

[PegNosePete]

You're offering up a very specific set of criteria here, and expecting a general consensus? The answer is obviously going to be, some people would like it, some people would not.

 

That doesn't really help you much, does it? Wouldn't it be better to ask for advice about your specific situation?

[pickflicker]

You're offering up a very specific set of criteria here, and expecting a general consensus? The answer is obviously going to be, some people would like it, some people would not.

 

That doesn't really help you much, does it? Wouldn't it be better to ask for advice about your specific situation?

 

Cheers, I thought I was the only one confused about the question.

 

Tatts and piercings are fine to me, but I work in television and have a nose piercing, so....

[melell]

I would date someone completely different to me in that regard. People change what they are into all the time, and maybe you will learn new things from them? Or find them fascinating?

 

If you like them as a person then go for it.

[the_entertainer1]

Personally, I wouldn't date anyone with tattoos or piercings. To me, they're not very attractive. I know that you shouldn't judge a person based solely on looks - but:

 

a) if they're trying to look alternative, perhaps their lifestyle/beliefs are more alternative

 

b) there needs to be a physical attraction. If I don't find tattoos/piercings attractive, then obviously the physical attraction won't be there.

 

I have relatives and friends with tattoos and piercings and know that they're kind, lovely people. That appearance is just not what I look for in someone I'd date.

[ltjg45]

The only piercings I am willing to see is on the ears. If there is metal on her tongue, lips, or nose, it is a deal breaker.

 

As for tattoos, I prefer a clean woman. Worse case scenario, she has, at the biggest, a medium sized one on her back and nowhere else.

[mammasita]

I work in a corporate setting. My outside of work demeanor is completely opposite of my work demeanor....therefore I so would.....and I would invite him to my work christmas party too.

 

Bottom line - it just depends on the person. Sounds like the guy you were talking to is a little too uppity

[kaylan]

It depends on how many tats/piercings and where. How much of it is a statement of some kind or whether it is a body art. The last guy I went out with had a great tattoo that he designed himself, nothing huge or distracting, just on his arm. I don't like sleeve tattoos though or anything that covers the torso too much. It takes away from the beauty of that person. When I'm in bed with someone I don't want to look at masses of ink, I'd like to see his skin.

 

Not big on piercings I have to say, mainly because often people have them around the mouth and that's the least hygenic thing I can imagine. Especially in the tongue, ewww. Imagine the food and bacteria that builds up. Kissing that... No thanks.

My lip ring never had bacteria issue. Stainless is cool like that. I brush twice a day and use mouthwash just like everyone else. Dont be so silly about piercings.

let's say you work in a corporate setting. your work attire has to consist of tucked-in button-downs, a tie, khakis, nice shoes, clean-cut face (no shaggy facial hair or noticeable piercings or tattoos). your colleagues are all suits and similarly conservative in appearance. because of this, your demeanor outside of work is the same as it within.

 

would you consider dating somebody who was pierced in multiple noticeable places and had ink? does that kind of thing matter to you despite your more conservative nature? do opposites really attract?

 

note: by 'pierced in multiple places' i mean maybe a lip ring, nose ring, some earrings. nothing too crazy. i myself have piercings and tattoos but i still think there are limits. just curious what you guys think. i was talking with a guy earlier today that i've known for a few years now, and asked why nothing ever came of us when we used to have an interest in each other. this was essentially his reasoning- that we are incredibly different in that i have a more alternative appearance and he is more straitlaced (though not excessively).

Why does it have to go between two extremes. I have a business degree and have worked in a corporate office.

 

If I didnt have medium length dreadlocks, Id look like every other shmuch in a suit. Youd have no idea about my in-progress sleeve tattoo, the small one on my chest, the barely visible eyebrow and lip ring holes where I rare (if ever) where piercings, and the fact that my ears are stretched to 2 gauge.

 

My skin tone does well to hide my piercing holes actually lol. Most people dont know they are there unless I point it out.

 

PS - I am by no means the only one like me. There are tons of educated people who dress up for work everyday yet have tats and piercings in their bodies. Heck I also play bass and can def rock out =P

Edited February 3, 2014 by kaylan

[mammasita]

My lip ring never had bacteria issue. Stainless is cool like that. I brush twice a day and use mouthwash just like everyone else. Dont be so silly about piercings.

Why does it have to go between two extremes. I have a business degree and have worked in a corporate office.

 

If I didnt have medium length dreadlocks, Id look like every other shmuch in a suit. Youd have no idea about my in-progress sleeve tattoo, the small one on my chest, the barely visible eyebrow and lip ring holes where I rare (if ever) where piercings, and the fact that my ears are stretched to 2 gauge.

 

My skin tone does well to hide my piercing holes actually lol. Most people dont know they are there unless I point it out.

 

PS - I am by no means the only one like me. There are tons of educated people who dress up for work everyday yet have tats and piercings in their bodies. Heck I also play bass and can def rock out =P

If I wasn't old enough to be your mother and didn't have a BF - I'd probably start stalking you now

[newmoon]

conservative vs. tats is not a case of opposites. opposites are when values are in conflict, not your taste in clothes, hair, etc. - although those might make you think the person will be vastly different. don't judge by appearance, judge by the person, tats or not. I would date anyone who had similar values and treated me right regardless of how they look/dress, or what tats and piercings they have. although tats on the face/neck and piercings in their face... just doesn't turn me on.

[Ninjainpajamas]

Tattoos for me are very subjective...some people I think they look appealing on, others I think they look abysmal. I'm not a big fan of tramp stamps (but tolerable of them) and less of a fan of the ankle/calf tat...especially if you've got cankles/huge legs.

 

Piercings...depends where and how much, I've dated women with a small nose stud or lip, or multiple studs in their ears...it looked good on them, I thought it was tasteful and eventually I didn't even notice it...belly button rings, tongue rings...whatever, I think the tongue ring can be a little dated and a belly button ring doesn't look great on flab either so you should keep that in check...I knew one girl you couldn't even see her tongue ring until she extended her whole tongue out...which she was attractive and it was surprising too.

 

I've dated women with who had several tats, one had a sleeve and peppered here and there with tats on most of her upper body...she was petite/cute bodied and slim, looked fine on her, she was sexy regardless...what mattered more was her personality and who she was at the end of the day, which she was a bit of a firecracker and short-tempered which is ultimately why I backed out of that one relationship wise, not her tats.

 

If I didn't find that woman attractive...tats/piercings included, then I wouldn't go for her regardless, those things themselves aren't going to sway me in either direction, no matter what I do for a living, that's a difference between business and pleasure...I wouldn't need like the model "wife" or "girlfriend" I'd instead be with the woman that made me the happiest, although I respect class I don't expect people to have to pretend to be plastic and cordial at all times, and it doesn't mean because you have tats or piercings you are a thug or misbehaved...so it as long as you handle yourself with respect then I don't really care what he/she looks like...business is strictly business to me, nothing more...and it's an attitude more than a dress-code, but you play that part at work in that environment...don't have to maintain that behavior or attitude in your personal life.

Edited February 3, 2014 by Ninjainpajamas

[Emilia]

My lip ring never had bacteria issue. Stainless is cool like that. I brush twice a day and use mouthwash just like everyone else. Dont be so silly about piercings.

Don't be so silly having them in the first place. Nobody forced you to.

 

If you make a statement about your body or face, that's fine. It's somewhat naive of you to expect that everyone will find it acceptable or attractive. A lot of people who don't have piercings around the mouth find the idea quite disgusting. I'm sorry but that's the case. If that bothers you, take them out. If not then accept the fact that not everyone will believe that 'stainless is cool like that'. Yuck.

[kaylan]

Don't be so silly having them in the first place. Nobody forced you to.

So having them is silly now? Lmao

If you make a statement about your body or face, that's fine. It's somewhat naive of you to expect that everyone will find it acceptable or attractive. A lot of people who don't have piercings around the mouth find the idea quite disgusting. I'm sorry but that's the case. If that bothers you, take them out. If not then accept the fact that not everyone will believe that 'stainless is cool like that'. Yuck.

Where did I say everyone must find it acceptable and attractive? I dont care that certain women dont find lip rings attractive. When I did where my lip ring (or a small stud), I didnt have problems finding ladies who enjoyed it.

 

Im pointing out that its silly and ignorant to think stainless steel would make someones mouth any more dirty than anyone elses. If someone cleans their mouth, stainless steel wont make it less clean.

 

Maybe do your homework?

[ExpatInItaly]

For me this is an easy question to answer. Not specifically because of the tattoos and piercings (which are fine, in my book) but because if I'm attracted to someone and I like him, I'd date him. Assumingly, if I found the tattoos and piercings unattractive, I would not be attracted to him so therefore I wouldn't date him.

 

The same goes for other physical features. Some people are not attracted to facial hair, or long hair on men, or shaved heads. I don't think it's about body art or having a conservative background, per se, but rather what each individual finds appealing or unappealing.

[GoreSP]

Don't be so silly having them in the first place. Nobody forced you to.

 

If you make a statement about your body or face, that's fine. It's somewhat naive of you to expect that everyone will find it acceptable or attractive. A lot of people who don't have piercings around the mouth find the idea quite disgusting. I'm sorry but that's the case. If that bothers you, take them out. If not then accept the fact that not everyone will believe that 'stainless is cool like that'. Yuck.

 

The point is that you said piercings in the mouth attract bacteria.

 

You may dislike the look of piercings, but it's no reason to attack the person's personal hygiene.

[Emilia]

The point is that you said piercings in the mouth attract bacteria.

 

You may dislike the look of piercings, but it's no reason to attack the person's personal hygiene.

They do attract bacteria and I do think that they have a serious misunderstanding of personal hygiene. You or others may not like to hear it but many of us - I've heard this several times from others, especially when it came to someone attractive with piercings as we would all go 'wwwwhhhhyyyyy'? - think that it's dirty. Food and bacteria will accumulate in places that aren't easy to clean. It stands to reason. If you have a piercing in your tongue or around your mouth, food stuff will fester and bacteria will grow.

[Emilia]

Dental News

 

This is just on tongue piercings but anything in the lips, etc can be similarly infected.

[KathyM]

I wouldn't mind ear piercings or a couple of tattoos, but a guy with nose rings, lip rings and a body covered with tattoos would not be appealing to me, unless the guy were a famous rock star or that look went along with his job in some way.

[mammasita]

Dental News

 

This is just on tongue piercings but anything in the lips, etc can be similarly infected.

I didn't even read that - but I just took my tongue ring out after 8 years....by choice.....not because I had bacteria or an infection.

[GoreSP]

They do attract bacteria and I do think that they have a serious misunderstanding of personal hygiene. You or others may not like to hear it but many of us - I've heard this several times from others, especially when it came to someone attractive with piercings as we would all go 'wwwwhhhhyyyyy'? - think that it's dirty. Food and bacteria will accumulate in places that aren't easy to clean. It stands to reason. If you have a piercing in your tongue or around your mouth, food stuff will fester and bacteria will grow.

 

If you don't clean it every day - sure. But that goes for everything.

 

The mouth just happens to have more bacteria to begin with. Imagine never cleaning under your nail.

[kaylan]

They do attract bacteria and I do think that they have a serious misunderstanding of personal hygiene. You or others may not like to hear it but many of us - I've heard this several times from others, especially when it came to someone attractive with piercings as we would all go 'wwwwhhhhyyyyy'? - think that it's dirty. Food and bacteria will accumulate in places that aren't easy to clean. It stands to reason. If you have a piercing in your tongue or around your mouth, food stuff will fester and bacteria will grow.

Ok, you seem to think we have a problem with whether ignorant people find piercings attractive. We dont. I care about women who find me attractive. Not ignorant females who assume I dont take care of my mouth. I have straight, clean, white teeth. My piercing wont change that my mouth is clean and fresh.

 

Food and bacteria accumulates ANYWHERE that you dont regularly clean. Why the hell do you think people brush their teeth? Nothing festers nor grows if you brush your teeth and use mouthwash. Stop spreading misinformation. And Ive had my lip piercing since I was 17 or 18. Never had issues.

Dental News

 

This is just on tongue piercings but anything in the lips, etc can be similarly infected.

ANYTHING AROUND THE MOUTH that you dont clean can become infected. Why do you think teeth become infected and rot? Well if you dont brush and clean them it happens. And that has NOTHING to do with piercings.

 

A clean mouth is a clean mouth. Stop being silly.

[Emilia]

If you don't clean it every day - sure. But that goes for everything.

I think you would have to clean them after every meal. Imagine kissing someone and food stuff dislodging from the tongue or lip piercing.

The mouth just happens to have more bacteria to begin with. Imagine never cleaning under your nail.

Have to say - and this is after watching four people on the train yesterday with facial piercings - people with piercings in more sensitive areas tend to be those that don't clean under their nails either. Not always I know! But a lot of people you see with stuff in their face that would set off a metal detector don't exactly have the cleanest looking hair or clothing. Essentially, when you date people you have to be able to assume that they are clean, if you care about that kind of thing.

 

I realise this isn't a nice thing to say but perception is everything and it's what I see around myself in a city day after day. I don't see immaculately kempt people with facial piercings.

[Emilia]

Ok, you seem to think we have a problem with whether ignorant people find piercings attractive. We dont. I care about women who find me attractive. Not ignorant females who assume I dont take care of my mouth. I have straight, clean, white teeth. My piercing wont change that my mouth is clean and fresh.

 

Food and bacteria accumulates ANYWHERE that you dont regularly clean. Why the hell do you think people brush their teeth? Nothing festers nor grows if you brush your teeth and use mouthwash. Stop spreading misinformation. And Ive had my lip piercing since I was 17 or 18. Never had issues.

 

ANYTHING AROUND THE MOUTH that you dont clean can become infected. Why do you think teeth become infected and rot? Well if you dont brush and clean them it happens. And that has NOTHING to do with piercings.

 

A clean mouth is a clean mouth. Stop being silly.

If you care about others' views, take out your piercings. If you don't, carry on. The OP asked for opinions and I have posted mine. This isn't your thread last time I checked?

 

Perhaps you should stop being silly by taking your piercings out?

[kaylan]

If you care about others' views, take out your piercings. If you don't, carry on. The OP asked for opinions and I have posted mine. This isn't your thread last time I checked?

 

Perhaps you should stop being silly by taking your piercings out?

I never gave a damn about others views. I just smile at the stupidity and ignorance of the misinformed.