Am I being paranoid or does my partner still want his ex back?

[Jessica2688]

Me and my partner have been together for 10months we recently split for 2 months as I found out he cheated on me on holiday in the first month of being together! My partner has 2 children With his ex, a couple of days ago his exs mom told me that while we were spilt he tried to get back with his ex. She was sorry to tell me but felt I had to know.

 

I called her up and asked if this was true and to know the details, she told me he was round her house all the time he told her everything that went on between us she knows every single detail of the break up and what he did to try and get me back, she then told me they were hugging in the car he grabbed her hand and kissed her, also told her he wants his little family back but she made it clear that she dosent want him back.

He used to tell me how much he hated her and she was nothing to him and would speak to her like muck when ever I was around, but when I wasn't around he would be lovley to her!

 

He told me the reason he went and confided in her was because he was in a bad place and he didn't know where his head was, but since we have got back together it's continued he has long conversations with her that he hides from me and when I ask him about it he says it's to speak to his kids, which I know isn't just the reason! He crys to me and tells me I'm the only one he wants and loves but I find this hard to believe. It's seems as when he knew it was over with me and him he went running back to her and grab every chance he could to win her back!

 

I need advice on what to do in this situation I find it hard to get in my head why someone who apparently had no feelings for his ex would go running to her for comfort and advice! Am I being a fool or just being paranoid. He also accuses me a lot thinking in cheating he gets angry really easily and screams in my face in front of his kids! I feel so vulnerable and scared I end up rebelling and smashing things up this is totally out of character for me I'm normaly a calm person, he's changing me into someone else! Please help!!! I'm driving myself mad overthinking this questioning if I'm overly paranoid

[Philosoraptor]

Yes, it sounds like he wants her back.

 

But the bigger question is why in the world would you stay with someone who cheated on you? Especially that early in the relationship.

 

Advice? Leave, find someone without drama that you can trust, and don't make the same mistakes in the future.

[TaraMaiden]

I'm sorry.

This man is clearly a flake, in that to be honest, he either doesn't really know what he wants, or he wants the best of both worlds.

 

His ex- won't have him back, and it seems for very good reason.

 

He lies to you, has cheated on you and goes behind your back.

These are not the qualities of a stable, reliable and dependable partner.

 

I hate to say it, but the best thing you can do for yourself to save yourself further confusion, heartbreak, mistrust and ignorance of what exactly is going on in his mind - is to cut loose from this guy and end this as soon as you can.